What's Left of My Patience: Hey everyone... - My MSAA Community

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What's Left of My Patience

Taylorsmom
Taylorsmom
โ€ข59 Replies

Hey everyone, it's been quite some time since I've been here. I hope that everyone is well! I'm here with a question this afternoon. Has anyone had issues with their patience these days more than in the past? For me, it seems like just about anything sets me off and that is so unlike me. It used to take so much to get me angry and now, if the wind blows wrong I have thee worst attitude. It's kind of scary to me.

59 Replies
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Yes Taylorsmom, our emotions are out of wack, mine do tht too, I just take a very deep breath & Pray Please give me strenth & heal my self-control! When i wake up in the day, even before setting my feet down, I Pray Father give me the Holy Spirit's 9 Fruits today, Galatians 5:22-- Love, Joy, Peace, Kindness, Patience, goodness, gentleness, Faithfulness & Self-Control. & I do have a handle on it w/Their Help. Hope & Pray that helps! Many Blessings๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ’œโค๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’™๐Ÿ’›---Jazmine

Hi Jazzyinco ! Thank you so much for this, I feel a lot better. I have been thinking that I am losing my mind lately because of this. Unfortunately, I don't feel in control these days and as a result, I'm not in a consistently good place these days.

Yes, you are more tan welcome, give it to Father Creator in HIS Son's Powerful Name Yahshua Messiah!โคโค๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ’›๐Ÿ™Fully Rely on YHVH Father Creator. Many Prayers, Love & Prayers.๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿพ๐Ÿˆ๐Ÿ˜ธ๐Ÿ˜ป---Jazmine

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador

I think I can relate to what you are saying. My husband said recently that I have changed completely since MS and taking even just supplemental medications. I know I am short tempered. I just don't have time to put up with the pity instead of support from what I thought were friends. One gal, whom I was very close with the last 11 years, has only contacted me 3 times this year, twice when she need last minute map changes for our cycling group. Again when she somehow lost, one set of maps on her computer, then again when she wanted me to make alterations to her cycling jersey, By then, I just did it gave it to her, and said, "Just take it!" Didn't charge her the $40. it should of cost. No thank you's for any of it. Now I have cut those ties. My large circle of friends has dwindled to less than 15 and I'm glad my MS has sort out the real friends for me. Patience, I used to be the most patient person in the world, I'm not rude, but I do speak up more often when I disagree with something..

Hi CalfeeChick ! I speak up more now than I have ever and I don't think twice about it. I'm glad about that part at least because before things would just boil up in me. So I'm okay with speaking up for myself as long as I'm not being rude to people but this current attitude of mine has got to go lol. It's sad that MS has caused the loss of friends but I understand because I have lost friends as well and don't feel comfortable talking to some regarding my MS, symptoms, fears, etc.

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to Taylorsmom

We're not supposed to stress ourselves out, right? So I get it out and walk away. No stress, said and done. My whole life would of been much less stressful if I'd started that a long, long time ago. ๐Ÿ˜‰๐Ÿ˜‰

This used to be me but now I find myself doing the total opposite CalfeeChick . To see me angry, irritated, whatever used to be far few and in between but now my cousin says that I'm a b&$#@. *sad face*

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to Taylorsmom

I used to be the most patient person ever. My personal life required it and when I worked and others had a customer with a problem, they called upon me to help resolve the problem. My managers used to tell me not to do that until they realized I was actually helping my co-workers learn from me and eventually because of my patient skills of listening, then helping customers and co-workers, I was selected to help train others in a company learning center. Then helped developed a training system when we rolled out a new computer system. "Patience is a virtue" We just need to look for it sometimes!๐Ÿค—๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

Well look at you CalfeeChick , great job!!!!

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to Taylorsmom

Gotta remember, that's not how it is now, I snap most often at those I love the most, my hubby of 28 years, and my 2 favorite friends that are both going through tough marriage probs and job probs.. I hold my breath and "ask" them to listen to the voice of experience๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿคฏ๐Ÿคฏ It took me years to get out of very bad marriage that had only lasted less that 2 years.. I told my then future hubby, it would of taken less time in prison, if I would of just shot him..๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

Talk about it......

Amore55
Amore55
in reply to CalfeeChick

CalfeeChick. I cannot imagine having fifteen friends. When I was diagnosed I had about 50 people that I honestly would have called dear friends, but it was amazing to me how they virtually drifted into the walls of life when I got ms. I have my elderly group that I take care of when I can, havenโ€™t been able to lately. But that is about it, besides my dear friends here. It is sad, like people think they might โ€œcatchโ€ ms! Oh well, love ya! Kelly xx

Iona60
Iona60
in reply to Amore55

I think people move on without us because we can't keep up. I can relate more to people that are 15 to 20 years older because they have a more sedate lifestyle.

I don't think I've ever had 15 friends! Wow! To have so many! Not sure now if I have any. I don't get out...I work PT then go home and stay there. There are 3 people (including me) in the office so it's not like I'm exposed to a lot of people. I'm just a loaner...

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to Amore55

I was put on permanent Disb. at 50 because of my very aggressive OA. Most of my 120 co-workers faded away, now that they are retired, we've reconnected, but our lives will never be as close as they once were. Think they were afraid of the bosses.

greaterexp
greaterexpCommunityAmbassador

I'll bet nearly all of us can relate at least a little. I've never thought of myself as irritable, but since the MS has settled in, I do find myself feeling irritable at times and having to catch myself from letting the attitude get the better of me.

Our dear friend, Tutu, talks about putting herself in "timeout" when she needs to. She's a wise woman! I laugh about one of Charles Dickens' characters who, when he felt "the wind from the east," would put himself in his room, which he called "the growlery." I use that term all the time. My sewing room is my growlery!

I pray you find relief in prayer and timeout when needed!

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to greaterexp

I miss our dear friend Tutu very much. Her wisdom and faith have set an example for me and others here. I know she sometimes reads along..

greaterexp
greaterexpCommunityAmbassador
in reply to CalfeeChick

She's an amazing woman of great faith and strength. What wonderful wisdom she has shared here!

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to greaterexp

Still a blessing in our lives๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿงก๐Ÿงก๐Ÿงก

Amore55
Amore55
in reply to CalfeeChick

It is funny that you wrote that today. I just pmโ€™ed her today and apologized for not communicating for so long. We were very close. I donโ€™t know why I let life get in the way. I miss her quiet strength too. Kelly

Patience is a virtue long set sail!!!

I understand completely I'm a completely cantankerous old bag sometimes lol ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„.My boyfriend says I've changed and I can't stand a pity party and one of my friends is always near to tears when we see each other! Drives me insane and I'm not that bad apart from wonky walking and wonky balance not giving in to any of the MS crap! Sorry rant over and Taylorsmom I'm with u hun and don't give up and try not to worry hun xxxx

KC0808
KC0808
in reply to janetb1968

That was a really good "rant":)

janetb1968
janetb1968
in reply to KC0808

Thank u lol xxxx ๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

Hi janetb1968 ! I don't mind the rant at all, I come here for the rant lol! Thank you and I won't give up!

Hi All I wasnโ€™t going to post on this one because I didnโ€™t think any one wanted to hear me tell themwhat I really thought. Well here It go itโ€™s funny not haha funny but just interesting I was telling my husband how people always say I am going to come over and visit with you or take you out. Well that has not happened. You have to understand I have trouble walking but I am still a breathing functioning person. Well part of me doesnโ€™t care is that wrong of me. And do you want to know what some times Itโ€™s ok. I do get frustrated and sometimes I am alright with that. I donโ€™t understand how people I thought were friends and then they are not.

This same thing happened to my mom in 1980 when she was diagnosed with lymphoma cancers she had two good friends once they found out she had cancer they never called her again. She passed in 1992 now she was a fighter they gave her 6 months to live but , she lived for 12 years. So itโ€™s not only us ladies and gents. Well everyone I feel like I am your friend if you want to talk I am here.

Sandra

KC0808
KC0808
in reply to ssdw1958

Sandra you are a sweetie and would be a wonderful friend to have :)

KC

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to KC0808

Thanks I needed that ๐Ÿ˜Š

janetb1968
janetb1968
in reply to ssdw1958

Hugs honey xxxx โคโคโคโค๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š๐Ÿ˜Š

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to janetb1968

Thanks see I knew I could talk to all of you ๐Ÿ™‚

Amore55
Amore55
in reply to ssdw1958

Sandra I always love your posts and consider you my forum friend. I still hope that one day I can put together a central location where we could try to get as many of us as possible together. Wouldnโ€™t it be wonderful to meet each other in person? Love and hugs to you my friend, Kelly

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to Amore55

I am sorry I didnโ€™t get back to you sooner but sometimes I donโ€™t check my posts just because itโ€™s been one of those things if Iโ€™m not feeling good I donโ€™t look at them sorry ๐Ÿ˜ about that. But it would be a good thing to meet up with each other.

Sandra

CalfeeChick
CalfeeChickCommunityAmbassador
in reply to ssdw1958

Sandra, Blessings to both you and your Mom. Yes, it's amazing how serious disease does separate us from wanna be friends and true friends. Here on our forum, we are blessed with many friends. I consider you all my friends and friends I just haven't met yet and got to know yet. Funny, that's how my Dad thought about everyone, "Friends he just hadn't met yet!"

My Dad and your Dad might have been friends. I remember my mom had been passed away a couple of years and my Dad and I had gone shopping and he cashed out before me and then I went to cash out. This girl at the register said to me โ€œyou know what his name was Adolph and I looked at her and said I know heโ€™s my Dadโ€

I donโ€™t know why I said to you but it just goes to show you how rude people are to other people. My father is Italian and his name was Americanized his real name is Adolpho. people just donโ€™t know who they are talking too. Let me tell you that made me feel good to tell her off in a situation like that because

You never know who you are talking to.

Taylorsmom By three in the afternoon, my patience has vanished and irritable reared its cranky head. Impose on me then, make me stand listening to you blather on, and I will cut you short. For the remaining part of the day, I will feel embarrassed by my behavior though I realize that anyone insensitive enough to talk and talk about herself with never a pause for breath while I am leaning on the doorframe because I cannot stand motionless for long is probably not aware that I violated my code of good manners. At times like this the words of Vinegar Joe Stillwell come to mind: don't let the b*******s wear you down. So irritability, as new an emotion as it is to some of us, is probably more common than we knew.

Taylorsmom
Taylorsmom
in reply to goatgal

goatgal I totally get you!

Just another thought....drs have said to me that we canโ€™t assume everything we feel is due to MS (or not completely due to MS). Hormonal changes could play a role in these feelings? Depression? Another health problem? Perhaps your physician would have thoughts about how to proceed?

Jesmcd2
Jesmcd2CommunityAmbassador

Taylorsmom ... Xanax! ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ญ

Not so funny story?

I was cleaning my home, trying to get everything done, you know... Dust, vacuum, sweep the whole nine yards... I was sitting on the floor, exhausted!! And almost done! Except behind the couch... And needed the broom. I literally went off on my poor dog, because he would not get it for me. I was screaming and yelling. Omg it was bad... I called my doc and he put me on Xanax.

I thought I was losing it! ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ˜ญ

Hang in there! ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ’•

J๐ŸŒ 

Taylorsmom
Taylorsmom
in reply to Jesmcd2

Oh no Jesmcd2 , poor dog and you by the end. Unfortunately, I think that I go in a little too hard on my 6 year old. When it's over, I feel horrible and sad at how I treated my baby and I often times apologize to her because I can turn any mole hill situation into a mountain I have realized. I am so working on this now that I have realized that I've realized that about myself.

For me itโ€™s from lack of energy and surplus of bs that I have to deal with and seemingly no end in sight. However, itโ€™s actually rarely like that, but the bs seems monumental and endless when Iโ€™m fatigued, if that makes sense? A phone call could be the last straw and itโ€™s only 3pm. How I slept the night before may be what impacts it the most. Iโ€™ve been working on it for 3 years.

Taylorsmom
Taylorsmom
in reply to kdali

Hi kdali ! Yes, you absolutely make sense! My energy definitely plays a role as well. I can go to bed and get a good amount of sleep but I am such a jerk given the right situation because I just feel drained and I don't have it in me to deal. I am currently a work in progress lol.

kdali
kdali
in reply to Taylorsmom

Yes, thereโ€™s nothing left sometimes! Keep moving forward though ๐Ÿค—

Yes, I find it hits me late in the afternoon, as I am already getting physically worn out. I usually leave the room and try to find my happy place again, as I can't stand to be around me and sure don't want to infringe me on others.

I wish that I could find my happy place Texandyroe , I may not fly off of the handle as often as I do lol.

Look inside yourself. Your happy place can be where ever you want it to be.

Less patience when my body parts don't function properly like I expect them to in order to complete some easy task (ie. as well as they used to).

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to sashaming1

Oh understand this soooo much to bad others donโ€™t and I know you know what I mean just because we donโ€™t look sick it doesnโ€™t mean we arenโ€™t.

Mine temper gets short for very little reason. At that point, when I'm home, I either go to my bedroom by myself or, better yet, go to my art room and work because my art takes my mind off the crazies.

One ๐Ÿค” think one of my neurologist told me to do when people start there Attitude just let it roll off your back. Some times easier said than doing.

hairbrain4
hairbrain4
in reply to ssdw1958

I don't roll stuff off of my back cuz I might turn around and step in it again. Then get even madder! I try to hand it over to God & let Him take care of it, He has a lot more patience that I do. And it really works, it helps to let go of stuff you don't need to be carrying around.

A wise woman on this forum who shall remain anonymous, once asked me โ€œwould you want to live with yourself?โ€. I have never forgotten that, especially when I am struggling. Kelly

kdali
kdali
in reply to Amore55

Oh, no chance Iโ€™d live with me!

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to kdali

Probably not just donโ€™t let my husband find out hehe

Jesmcd2
Jesmcd2CommunityAmbassador
in reply to kdali

๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ˜‚ I don't want to live with me either!! Amore55 kdali and ssdw1958 ๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ’•

J๐ŸŒ 

ssdw1958
ssdw1958
in reply to Jesmcd2

Good thing my husband is a pretty good mellow person. He can handle my ups and downs.

hairbrain4
hairbrain4
in reply to Amore55

That's a good question! Makes you look at yourself.

You know we are closer to Mars than we have been in over 12 years. Think its gravitational pull might be affecting us? If the moon can move oceans, its hard telling what an other planet can do to us! MS can cause some serious depression issues which can rear it's ugly head with outbursts, crying, feeling irritable etc. As a matter of fact my Dr. put me on Lexapro when I was first diagnosed. I've had depression issue in the past & he was afraid the diagnosis of MS might send me into never never land. It was quite the opposite though. I was thankful that there was a reason why I was feeling the way I was.

CynthiaS
CynthiaS
in reply to hairbrain4

Ain't that the truth...so reasonable

Jesmcd2
Jesmcd2CommunityAmbassador
in reply to hairbrain4

I will go as far as looking for solar flares hairbrain4

๐Ÿ˜• To much disturbance is not a good thing!!! ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿคฃ

๐Ÿค—๐Ÿ’•

J๐ŸŒ 

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