given up: my dad has been in hospital... - Multiple System A...

Multiple System Atrophy Trust

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given up

chester2107 profile image
18 Replies

my dad has been in hospital for nearly 3 weeks now , chest infections, trouble swallowing, had a call yesterday , dr said he doesn’t want any more treatment or feed.

he still knows his own mind, just has trouble talking

he has had enough , my mum is so confused and upset as am I and the rest of the family

luckily we can still visit the hospital, even though my mum shouldn’t go as she is high risk , but how can she not when they have been married for 61 years

i think it will be a case of keeping him comfortable , don’t want to lose him , but he says he has no quality of life

he still has a smile for us though

hate this disease

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chester2107 profile image
chester2107
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18 Replies
Yanno profile image
Yanno

Hello Elaine, I'm so sorry for you all. This dreadful condition is a beast at the best of times but in the current situation it seems even worse. I'm glad your dad has a smile for you, he will know how much you have cared for him and how much you love him, he is very lucky to have you and your mum to give him such affection and warmth.

Keep strong for your mum and I hope you both stay safe in the weeks ahead.

Thinking of you, Ian xx

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Yanno

thank you Ian , you stay safe as well xx

Hellebelle profile image
Hellebelle

Hi Chester I really understand your distress. We have been there with my dad. It's great that he still knows you are there for him. That is the most important thing at the moment, your love for him. I send all my love to you and your family. I also hate this disease with a passion.

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Hellebelle

thank you , yes it’s heartbreaking ❤️

xx

Tusker1953 profile image
Tusker1953

Hi Elaine I am so sorry to read your post. My husband is also in hospital at the moment with infections etc. It is such a worry. As Yanno and Hellebelle have said your dad knows he is loved and in life that is the most important thing.

Love and best wishes to you and your family

Jan

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Tusker1953

thank you , sorry to hear your husband is in hospital , such a worrying time

sending love to you and your family x

elaine xx

Pushpak_Roy profile image
Pushpak_Roy

Hi.. I know these are hard times.. But family stands together during hard times..even if your dad complains about his quality of life it is u and the family whose love brings a smile on his face..try to tell him some random jokes..i know it will be hard for you.. But just lookout to keep him happy which i sense u already do.. Ur mother is at high risk but they must see each other..whenever they can..kindly take as much precautions as you can to protect her.. U r the bridge of their love.. U r strong , faithful and intelligent..ur mind will work under any circumstance..rest lays in the hands of God.. God bless u..

I will always wish that God looks after u and your family.

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Pushpak_Roy

ahh thank you , ive always been very close to my dad , my brothers closer to my mum

but yes even in this awful time , we still have a little joke or laugh , usually at someone else’s expense ...

my mum won’t stop going over to see him

i don’t think she realises how serious the virus is, but what can we do , but support her

xxx

Derkie54 profile image
Derkie54

So very sad to read this post. You're Dad has been through so much by the sounds of it, and you and the family as well.

Our thoughts are with you......how nice that Dad gave you a smile even though you say he's had enough.

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Derkie54

i know love him so much ❤️❤️

Diane831 profile image
Diane831

Oh how difficult for you all. Balancing wanting to keep your dad with you all, as well as understanding how it feels from his position. Did you get round to having those kinds of conversation with him when he could still fully express his feelings?

My heart goes out to you and your Mum. God bless. Diane

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Diane831

i did chat to him when he was first diagnosed and told there was no cure , and he said , if it gets too much , he wouldn’t want to carry on 😢

he is 83 , only had it for 5 years , he doesn’t have much quality of life now really , even though we do our best xx

ChocolatePot profile image
ChocolatePot

thinking of you. Been there with my dad last year. Hospital put in feeding tube for 10 days but my dad had enough too and on day 8 ripped it out. He is at peace now and I am glad he does not have to be here for this virus. My mum is keeping safe and distance and just this week visited his grave telling him he is better off and can be glad he is not around to see the restrictions and madness. <<<hugs>>> to you and your family

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to ChocolatePot

my dad ripped his out, it was hurting and not really helping , it’s so hard losing them , but such a horrible illness

glad your dad is at peace now❤️xx

Arrh it’s so sad my dad is suffering with he’s Secretions he just can’t cough 😢he looks lost and all he does all day is try to cough it’s hard to watch em like this my mum struggles to come to terms with what’s happening still, my dad is my life like u and I don’t want to lose him it will brake me 💔 it’s also so hard to watch em suffer I try to stay happy even though I’m not it’s about them now smile when u can if he’s down try and smile which is the hardest I know sending u all the love from one daughter to another 💙💙💙

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Startreckersdaughter

ahh thank you my dad is my world as well , love him so much , so dreading it

sending you love 💔 xx

Startreckersdaughter profile image
Startreckersdaughter in reply to chester2107

Keep strong they need us now 😘 hugs 🤗

chester2107 profile image
chester2107 in reply to Startreckersdaughter

they do xx

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