Not strong at the moment.
Not there yet: Not strong at the moment. - Mental Health Sup...
Not there yet
16 Replies
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I read some of your other post. You sound strong, but those hurtful feelings get to you after awhile. It's as if you can only fight it for a certain amount of time and then you can't stand anymore. I imagine those periods of strength will last longer and longer as time goes on. Living for your girls is a wonderful thing, you won't regret it. Do not blame yourself for this, it takes two, and any way blame is useless. Pam
in reply to
Hi Vintage-me
Thanks for your reply, under normal circumstances I'm amazingly strong I keep everyone and everything together but I never in a million years expected for it all to be gone in an instant with no action plan, no contact, no willing to work through the difficulties. That is the hardest part is the shock, the loss, the loneliness. From here on I'm going to not accept full blame as you quite rightly state it does take two, so when I start feeling like I'm too blame I will question myself and think,,, hang on what about when I asked for a little support and didn't feel that or get that.
Enjoy your day Hun x
in reply to
I've been married 51 yrs and found out my husband has been seeing a younger woman. The old fool. I'm not to big on men just now. You just do your best and be kind to yourself. Pam
Wow, 51 years I feel for you that must have been a real blow for you, it was 23 years for me. How long if you don't mind asking since it happened to you Hun x
in reply to
About a month since I found out, going on about 4 mo. He gave himself away because he was acting so smug so I went through his desk and found some notes which I confronted him with. It was ugly. We're working on things, but I will never be able to let my guard down. He's taken that away from me Pam
in reply to
Aw Pam
That's so sad, but hopefully you can work something out without having to drop your guard. And I really hope that you can rekindle your happy moments together. Sending love and wishes for you Hun 💖
Know the feeling so well ❤️
in reply to
Afternoon silv98
Keep strong Hun I'm sure our situations will improve, the roller coaster hopefully will stop and let us all off. I'm experiencing every emotion there is, sadness guilt loss anger to name a few. The rawness is awful one minute you have it all the next day it's gone, over, done no contact. My killer is knowing our love is there but we are not.
Keep strong xx
in reply to
You couldn't of explained any better, you took the words right right out of my mouth 😢
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Anytime you need to let it all out silv98 you do so Hun, it's hard I know only to well but there isn't one single ace up my sleeve that I could use to change my situation for the moment and suicide is becoming less of an option we just have to ride the storm. That sounds awful I know but if I keep going over wanting to rewind till just before my loss and know I can't rewind what happened and actually it makes me feel so much worse coz I'm needing what I haven't or can't have. I got so desperate last night I had half a tablet (diazepam) but felt it was much needed after lying in bed and still thinking till it was getting light. I started to think oh hell another day how will I get through it, then next thing I remember was waking this afternoon at 2pm. I do feel slightly better and think having some sleep helped. I'm trying to motivate soon and go out for a drive, a long drive with my girls. I'll possibly blog again later on my return.
Keep strong Hun and I'm sure we'll look back on our sad situations one day and think oh I won't be going there again and it will make us wiser for our future paths.
😀
Thank you x
Feel I can't breathe this morning want run away from life right now but don't have no where to go
in reply to
Hi sliv98
Everyday I have them awful feelings, coupled with guilt, anxiety, death and sadness. Luckily I have three girls who are helping massively but I still get them beneath my surface. I've also been emailing Samaritans too and those emails are helping too. Please try to find some strength in your difficult times you are not alone. I read over many posts throughout the day and I see we are by no means alone. It is hard very very hard and I sometimes see no ending to these awful feelings, but I try to get by even though I'm breaking apart inside. Keep strong Hun and you can always private message someone if you feel you'd rather be discreet about your worries. I seen my doctor which helped to release slightly my awful inner feelings. And tomorrow is my first counselling meeting but it won't be my last as I feel the need to express my inner hurt to repair me as a whole person.
Keep posting Hun people are here for you x
in reply to
I've had that feeling and it's so hard to calm yourself doew. I used to carry a bottle of water with me and when I couldn't breath, I would drink. I figured there was airin thr water and I would get it that way. Also the very act of drinking would calm me. It was a little crutch I used and it helped.
in reply to
Hi Vintage
I got up with similar feelings today and funny you mentioning water as I promised to take the girls to the craft shop but didn't want to. However I did manage to go but I waited near the entrance and remained in the car with that very bottle of water I take everywhere with me. I swish it round my mouth no end of times but like you say water have been my saviour too. Trying today to grapple with the reality side of life being money and those financial worries. Also told my dear pappa whose 85 years and lives with me about the relationship breakup and he's absolute devastated bless. I think it shook him slightly as he was away for the week when it happened.
Feel I can't go on the hurt is so much right now want to run away hate feeling like this.
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