Supported living and parent finding work

[LymeBay]

Hi. I wonder if anyone can help or has been in this situation. We are in the process of my son going into supported living. This is not something I'm really ready for (and will never be ready for!) but my partner, his dad, thinks that we need to start planning for the future, neither of us are getting younger and all that. We also don't want a crisis situation placement if one of us was to become seriously ill or die.

Now my worry is about what is next for me. Partner has always worked. I had to give up work due to son's high needs. He has severe physical and learning disabilities and Lennox Gastaut epilepsy. We have fitty days where he can't attend daycentre and remains at home. We have had numerous life threatening 999s over the years.

When he moves I will need to go back to some kind of employment pretty much immediately. However I know I am going to receive numerous calls about the epilepsy particularly in the beginning. I need to be there for my son and to guide carers. I of course also need to be at the hospital for life threatening situations. We will also have unnecessary 999s as we have done from respite or daycentre. It will take them a while to understand his epilepsy which is complex and ever evolving.

How on earth can I work and be able to drop everything at a moment's notice? I simply cannot be reliable. Yet I need to earn, we cannot manage without it.

Not only am I worried sick about him moving out I am worried sick about this issue. I just want to boil my head really.

Any thoughts? Anybody been in a similar situation? Thankyou.

[Everypasswordistaken]

How about jobs working from home? Perhaps the job centre will be able to help. Good luck

[LymeBay in reply to Everypasswordistaken]

Thankyou for your response. Yes I know the obvious solution is working from home of which there are many opportunities these days. The issue is if I have to be at my desk for so many hours during the day (as my neighbour does, she works for Universal credit). If it was flexible enough to allow me to drop everything and go as long as I catch up and complete my hours. I just don't know if such jobs exist. I am definitely going to speak to a couple of local employment agencies to ask their advice.

[Steve__]

Good luck!

Tough when you're in the middle of it, but from the outside it seems there are some things that might become more obvious and clear over time.

My brother's care home (a very good one, at last!) is more self sufficient than I expected in terms of dealing with seizures, etc. Good to offer your expertise, but it may be the case that in a few months you might not be needed very often. Sadly, many service users have no parental supporters at all, and the care home carers (ideally!) just take over. Maybe you don't need to decide on a forever career plan until a few weeks have settled in and you know how the carers have taken over?

There's also the type of work you're after. Different jobs need different levels of be-at-desk time. Charities and councils etc tend to have understanding employment policies... I've known some be happy with good work done in non standard styles.

Good luck.

[LymeBay in reply to Steve__]

Thankyou for your positive response, I appreciate this. Good to hear that your brother is in a good home.

[Balamorym]

Employers do have a legal duty to offer greater flexibility to carers and unpaid leave if you need it. Some employers will be better at this than others. Try googling disability friendly employers in your area. Good luck!

[LymeBay in reply to Balamorym]

Thankyou