My son has severe learning disability and at 32 I would like to teach him to read and write.Can anyone offer advice and if it is worthwhile?

[Charlie2750]

Thomas is mobile talks a lot and goes to a day care facility.He left school and college without the ability to read or write.He sight reads large ads on a sainsburys van or Asda van and sky programmes and I need to hold his hand to write his name.Teachers at school(it was a good school) but they helped him with lots of other skills and said they would help him to tie his shoe laces and help with money which did not work.He doesnt know the difference between a pound coin or 50 pence.and has to wear velcro shoes.Is what I am looking for really not the answer and should I just accept that he will not need to read and it does not matter if he cannot? I was thinking of trying the old booksJanet and John etc?

[49Twister]

My son like yours also has severe learning disabilities, talks a lot and he is 45 years old. He went to special school till he was 19 and left without being able to read and write. He has no concept of money or time, all the basic skills that we take for granted. He has a great memory and recognises everyday signs, shop names etc very much like your son. My thoughts about my son are that although he can’t read or write, he has found his own coping mechanisms to survive and along with my support is the best he can be. I believe the school realised this and focused on his other life skills. I understand how you feel, it does take time to come to terms with everything, and accept their disabilities as I think we do grieve for what we think they are missing out on. It really is a difficult journey but we can only hope they are as happy as they can be. Hope this helps.

[Charlie2750 Community friend in reply to 49Twister]

Hi 49 Twister you are so right. My son is so positive and sees nothing as a problem.

I am accepting of his learning disability however I see him improving in all his social skills but I wanted to spend more time with him learning. We watch all the Attenborough films but he has no concept of these issues and I sometimes can’t always stop my eyes from closing(elderly and tired and tablets as well as boring).

We are lucky and grateful for his positive attitude while so many bad things going on that he doesn’t understand.

He has a great social life,disco cricket (disabled cricket) training and outings with local Mencap . We enjoy our Peter Pan ❤️ Thankyou for your kind reply

[Beightoc]

Hi there. Your post resonated with me as I went through exactly the same process with my son. He can read a few words but can’t add up or comprehend money. We spent an hour every day going through coins or using flash cards to try to get him to learn. Some days we thought we were making progress but really it didn’t make any difference in the long term. We decided in the end that we would just accept him for what he could do and for all the other positive things he brought into our lives. I’m not saying don’t try to teach him to read and write, but in our experience if they haven’t managed it at school then there may not be much room for progress. Having a learning disability means having an IQ of below 70 so it could just mean that he just isn’t intellectually capable. Looking back we all got very frustrated trying this and in retrospect we wouldn’t do it again. However, my son has an iPad and can manage to find things on it by Siri (and by chance!) and never ceases to amaze me how he manages to whizz around it! Hard though it is, a learning disability is lifelong and he’s not going to suddenly change. By all means I’m not telling you not to try, just be realistic and perhaps focus on the positives. Good luck!

[Charlie2750 Community friend in reply to Beightoc]

Hi Beightoc thank you for your reply and yes my son can manage to find his way around the sky box so much so that when we watch neighbours and coronation street he has the controls and skips through the adds but on watching cricket on his own I wonder how he manages to watch 7 hours before he goes to the daycare 🙂!! We bought him a amazon fire kids for Christmas but his coordination is not good and he doesn’t use a knife and fork because it is a complicated skill. He can or did manage a computer mouse and navigated his way to Cbbees website and was good on the PlayStation 1 but since we got sky and also the games became more complex he only watches Tv

Thank you for your kind reply and I hope life is good for you

[SamCJ66]

My SEN son is 19 and can't read or write and we all tried to help him, but he doesn't have that ability. He can, however, recognise company logos etc, rather than reading them. From what I've heard etc many people who hid their inability to read often hid it, using exactly this method, of recognising the shapes/colours etc, rather than reading. However, if you think that your son will enjoy it and will make some progress, then it will be enriching for him. You could look at alternative methods of teaching him, to see if it makes a difference to him. Good luck.

[Hidden in reply to SamCJ66]

hi,

can your son look at screens like ipad etc etc ? reason being i went to a sen school too and i did power points to help the teachers because they found it hard to do thingss with me because i tried to do my best but they helped me by giving me ideas for them and i become a website called "priory woods" you put it into google and its a website for young people who find it hard to do things. hope this helps becky

[Hidden in reply to SamCJ66]

hello, i suggested priory woods have you tried it out?

[Maisymop]

I have a daughter, now aged 20, with severe learning difficulties, and she has a sight vocabulary (which means that she is able to read/recognise ) of over 1700 words, and this continues to increase as I introduce more words.

There is an ‘institute’ in the USA (don’t be put off by that word) called The institute for the achievement of human potential, an amazing place that focuses on the development of disabled children and adults as well as non-disabled children. We attended one of their courses many years back and then took our daughter a while later.

They do a range of fascinating books, which you can buy, the two that have worked incredible well for us are - ‘How to teach your baby to read’ and ‘How to teach your baby maths’ by Glenn Doman (whom founded the above ‘Institute’s), look for these books online, buy them, read through and then follow each stage. These books are really easy to follow. Don’t be put off my the fact that ‘baby’ is in the title, the process is the same for whatever aged person with a learning difficulty who is being taught using this system. Again with maths my daughter can work with any number up to 100, it’s truly fascinating to see how quickly she can work out the answer to any sum instantly. I read these books and put everything they said into practice, they are truly phenomenal. A fair amount of preparation from yourself need in making the material that your son will then learn, but for him the process is easy.

Please do come back ask me any questions as I have had great success from adopting this system of learning, I’m sure it will work for your son, It makes such sense when you see how quickly your son can learn to read, but it is a lot of work for you preparing the material, but well worth it for the results you will see.

[Hidden in reply to Maisymop]

hey,

well some books are not that helpful because as i got older i got ocr certificates saying i completed certain math questions and compelled and succeeded but if your daughter is that talented have you thought about a quiz show that you could do with her and have small prizes she would like as a reward? i know this may be sum what of a good idea, think about it and get back to me asap. many thanks becky

[Spujo]

Look up toe by toe, resource used to teach reading difficulties, taught my daughter who has a Mild ld x

[Yous1]

Hi my Youssef & I Work for

Royal Mencap Society

I Think you should speak with

LD Help Line!

On. 0808 808 1111 for any questions about learning disability”

[Hidden]

hi I'm becky, I have autism and I found it quite hard at school and I found a website that may help your son, If you go to google and write priory woods in it is a interactive lesson and songs to help those who find it hard to look at people in lessons i found it hard to stick to something and this website helped me hope this helps.

[Hidden]

hey things like this will get easier try going to google and search for websites for people who find it hard i am the one who suggested priory woods as i forgot my password for this website, plus you can put 50p 20p and 10p or 2x 5p in a pot and ask him where witch coin is can he touch? coins? can he feel? maybe go round a cup and put the coins in and ask for the 10p and see if this helps. good luck!

[Hidden]

I used google: phonics youtube and animal alphabet - any educational programme he was interested in and letter tracing which was taught very slowly through first tracing with finger the letter (books available) and colouring in anything he was interested in cartoons, Thomas the tank engine, Bertie the bus which developed his Gross Motor and Fine Motor skills which is also on youtube

[Hidden]

Hello, I’m 40 with severe learning disability and ADHD. My math is very low and doesn’t matter how hard I try, I can’t force my brain to do what it won’t do. I have learned to accept over time that things are the way they are and not to feel guilty. It’s great that you care about your son and want to help him. Don’t be so hard on yourself either. My son is 12 with Autism, intellectual disability and ADHD. He will always be behind for his age learning but we have to accept that they try the best they can and just praise them. I hope it helps a little coming from someone with disabilities:))

[scottneil]

hello my name is connor i live in letchworth herts i have learning disabilities also autistic i am 23 live in supported housing i find it a challenge to meet new people especially girls i have been on date sites but once find out i have disabilities they take the mick out of me are there any people out there that would like to chat and any girls out there that are intrested in finding male friend and posible more you can first contact me via my dads email [e-mail] you could leave contact details gave my dads as i need to feel safe you know how crue people can be hope everyone keeps safe respect to you all connor

[Lilly123456]

The first step is to learn the letter sounds. You can get a free chart on the Internet. Then when he knows the sounds we found the “Yes We Can Read” book from Gatehouse Publishing very easy to follow. It is intended for adults and for non teachers to use to help a person learn to read. gatehousebooks.co.uk/ Good luck!