Working and learning disability

[Sarah_Mencap]

It is the last day of our expert event all about work and employment. Have a look at the conversation so far, and make sure you get your question in as soon as possible.

healthunlocked.com/mencap/p...

Many thanks to Paul for being our expert and all his wonderful posts.

Sarah

[ulrichburke]

well, I didn't know anything about the event till right now (last day!) because nobody ever tells me anything, but there's sure stuff I'd love to know!

I'm 52 now. I have Cerebral Palsy, Hydrocephalus, Dyspraxia and Aspergers. For the last 20 years I've been volunteering for everything in sight - and being constantly and remorselessly turned down for every opportunity because I 'look odd' so I'm obviously just 'some weirdo' who nobody wants to be around. Proof - they've had to move me between 3 cities because I was being beaten up and robbed so often by the locals the police got tired of rescuing me, so they moved me on instead. I've had all my teeth kicked out, legs burned intentionally, head caved in by a large fist with chunky rings on and often, in the last town, come home to a totally empty flat because they kept burgling me.

I'd love to get to do voluntary work, though, which is where your expert comes in. You see, they keep wanting references. 2 people I've known for at least 2 years who can vouch for me. And I see where they're coming from on that - it's just I don't know anyone. I've never had any friends - try getting friends when you're disabled - or relationships - try getting THOSE when you're disabled! Never had much in the way of work because nobody wants to employ 'that weirdo'. And there's this glass ceiling. Above it, able-bodied being Nice Volunteers. Below it, disabled people being volunteered for. Nowhere do you see disabled people actually doing the volunteering. Proof - do you ever go into a charity shop and see people the charity's supposed to be helping amongst the staff? I'm betting 'no' or 'rarely'.

Please, can you ask your expert how the heck you get past the 'what can that spacmo do?' barrier? Y'see, when you're disabled you have to get things right first time. Able-bodied? It's a learning curve. Disabled? It's total proof you should never have been allowed to try anything out in the first place, it's not your fault, poor guy, you're obviously just too stoopid/brain-damaged/learning-challenged/(insert your own phrase here!) and you should never have been allowed to have a go in the first place. So of course you never learn, nobody gives you the chance to. So what do I love?

Don't laugh. Computers. Can program them (Visual Basic/Basic/Cobol, bit out of practice though but still remember all I've ever been taught and can use it) can do DTP/layout/design (again never had a shot at the most modern software but remember all I've been taught perfectly) and would love to learn web programming. Can't self-learn from videos, doesn't work for me. If anyone takes me through anything, I remember it. And can repair them, if someone helps with any soldering. Dyspraxia. Not great co-ordination, but know where everything goes.

Mainly, though, I've had 40-odd -VERY odd!! - years of being laughed at, beaten up, asking girls to marry me who laugh in my face and go off with my money (that's women for you, right!) worked over and mugged by people I thought were friends and never, ever being given a shot at doing stuff. Surely by now I deserve some kind of break that doesn't involve me losing all my disability benefits? Or not?

I'd also love to have friends/feel safe in groups/not be banned from everywhere because people don't like looking at 'that weirdo' - recent quick example. Was in a Wetherspoons near me. Guy comes up with a bouncer and says 'I've not come in here to look at Frankenstein all afternoon, either you bounce him or I will.' There was a rather interesting 5 minutes after that, but I ended up in the gutter outside with bouncer and bloke stamping on me and I've been banned ever since for 'causing trouble'. All I was doing was drinking coffee! Got a LOAD of similar examples I could give you. Love to learn how to associate with people too - life skills - Aspergers, y'know.

Yours respectfully, with hope

Chris.

[Paul_Mencap in reply to ulrichburke]

Hi Chris

Thanks so much for sending me your message sorry things seem tough for you but you seem to have such a good attitude which I’m sure serves you well. I hope things are going in the right direction for you.

Also discrimination should be challenged, please do get in touch with your local police station as there should be support and protection for you.

Have you ever had any support from social care? Under the care act changes everyone is entitled to an assessment for support so please I would suggest seeking this assessment so that you can get further support.

It’s difficult to know which direction to send you in without knowing where about in the UK you are. Is it further volunteering you were interested in or courses to develop your computer programming?

do-it.org/ is perfect site for finding volunteering

And you should be able to find locally it’s called - adult community learning. Which is excellent for adult courses (many of which are free if you are on the correct benefits)

Thanks

Paul