New here and in desperate need of advice

[Squeal]

Hello,

I’ve only just joined this forum, I’m a 49 year old female and I have quite complex mental health problems, I also have a 46 year old brother with learning disabilities who lives with me, he is also dyslexic and has a stammer. I am his only support network, as over the last 6 years we lost our Mum, older brother and our Dad was diagnosed with dementia, so life’s been a bit tough for us. I adore my brother and am fiercely protective of him, I have always tried to make sure his life is no different to that of a person without his difficulties, taught him to use household appliances, cook basic meals, use a computer/tablet, and he can even drive a car. Yesterday we were woken up at 7am to the police who said they had a search warrant, and arrested my brother on suspicion of possessing and uploading indecent images of children, I was and am absolutely devastated, but I am also 100 percent certain that he has not done what he’s accused of, I acted as his appropriate adult, and we got a solicitor, and I know that he’s not mentally capable of what they’ve accused him of, they were talking about torrent sharing, encryption and various other things. I am in desperate need of somewhere to get some help to understand all of this, it is all based on our IP address, and they seized every device in the house capable of connecting to the internet, and we’ve been told it will be several months before we know what if anything they find. This is doubly hard for me, as I was a victim of child sexual abuse, so going through this with him is causing me severe problems. I’m terrified of what will happen next, I know my brother has no interest in children, in any way, but he’s very gullible and easily led, and I’m terrified someone has got him to do something, or he’s clicked on something without realising what it was.

The thought or fear of my brother going to prison is killing me, especially as I know he hasn’t knowingly done this. I would appreciate any help or advice as to wear to turn.

[49Twister]

What an awful situation to be in, so I hope someone on here is in a position to be able to advise you. I don’t know too much about computers but I believe you can block some sites from children accessing them, which in hindsight might have protected him from being in this position now. I really hope you both get the support you need.

[Sarah_Mencap]

Hello

Welcome. I am very sorry you are going through this, and you sound as if you need some support.

If you need to talk to someone you can always call the Samaritans at any time by calling 116 123. There will be someone there to support you and talk about how you are feeling.

They are available 24 hours a day.

samaritans.org/

You could also call Mencap's helpline. It is open from 9 to 3pm, Monday to Friday, on 0808 808 1111. It is free and confidential and there trained advisors who can take the time to talk you about this

mencap.org.uk/advice-and-su...

This is a lot of pressure for you, so also make sure your GP knows what you are going through so that they can support you.

Please let us know how you get on.

Sarah

[I_am_a_sibling Survey Community friend]

Hi Squeal it sounds like you and your brother have had a very hard few years, and what you're going through now must have shocked and scared you both. I echo what Sarah_Mencap has advised - do call samaritans if you need to and do make sure your GP knows about how your mental health is now. You need support for yourself during this time.

It must be incredibly painful to have to wait out the situation while the police investigate, and the fear that your brother may go to prison is very real. The police should do a very thorough investigation, and in doing so, they should find whatever it is he has clicked on that could have duped him into this, or the person that may have talked him into it. They should be able to work out that this isn't 'him'.

Many siblings are looking after a disabled brother or sister - if you need a listening ear, do get in touch with Sibs (charity for siblings of disabled people) - sibs.org.uk