7 Days in: shocked and scared

[Faith4Faye]

Hi all, my young mum collapsed last week and was rushed to hospital and has since been diagnosed with pneumaccocol bacteria and severe sepsis. She is currently ventilated. The medical staff although very supportive offer no positives at this stage. I’m utterly devastated and the whole family is in shock, we’re finding it hard to talk and function. Visiting her is extremely limited due to COVID precautions so I find myself in a horrible limbo unsure what to do and scared of what will come.

Mum started to open her eyes and twitch yesterday which feels distressing to see as she looks so much in pain and I worry she is scared and feels alone. I don’t even know if she is aware I’m there when I can visit.

Are there any relatives out there that can offer advice for going through this time? And for any discharged ICU patients- did you know your loved ones were close? How can I help her?

From a broken daughter

[Sepsur]

Hi @Faith4Faye

I’m so sorry that your family & Mum are going through this awful ordeal. I hope you can take some comfort that your Mum will be being looked after extremely well & carefully.

I entered ICU with strep A, double pneumonia & sepsis moving into septic shock & multiple organ failure - whilst it didn’t look like I would survive - I did. You say your Mum is young which will be an asset.

Whilst coming out of an induced coma - I dreamt frequently about my family & friends - or those my family spoke about as they sat around my bedside.

We also hold a relatives zoom drop-in every Tuesday evening if you are ever interested - please message me. This is a meeting exclusively for relatives.

[Copse77]

Please don’t despair. Remain hopeful is the best advice we were given when my brother was critically ill with sepsis. As Sepsur says your Mum is in the best place and will be receiving great care. I sent you a few private messages with more information if you click in at the chat function speech bubble at the top of the page.

[FamilyHistorian]

Just to support what Sepsur said. Your mum has age on her side I’m 72 and pulled through after 6-8 ventilated and sedated. My wife visits the relatives group which is tonight and benefitted / benefits greatly. Once your mum is home she may want to join our exercise groups on zoom and visit the joint meeting. What is important is that you look after yourself the hospital are looking after your mum.

I am sorry to say that once she comes round it is likely that you both will go through difficult times but it does get better.

[BabyRhino]

Hi Faith 4Faye, I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I remember well the shock of those first days & weeks when my husband was in ICU. It felt like agony that no one seemed to be able to offer me any positives. I now realise that the staff have to stick to the facts of each & every moment when talking with relatives. Ethically they cannot offer any more hope beyond what comes from their expertise and dedication. I echo the others in saying, try and trust that your Mum is in the best hands possible. And take the best care possible of yourself and each other as a family.

[DrARDS]

I do feel for you! It’s a very challenging period. We went through something similar and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone else...days and weeks of emotional torment.

Stay strong and keep Praying is all I can say! Sending you and your mum Positive vibes to overcome this challenge.

Ps

Please don’t go through it all alone! Get as much and support as you can from your friends and fam.