Poz and Content

[Chamako]

Do others have a problem with being sexual active because of their status and feel insecure about getting a bad reation from the other person? I avoid meeting new people bacause I have had a few reactions that didn't go to well. I felt so incredibly awful for these guys becauae they were so ignorant and misinformed. Haven't met anyone in awhile.

[dvvb]

same here! i was diagnosed last year 25 february and haven't met anyone after the diagnosis. definitely brought my self esteem down.

[Chamako in reply to dvvb]

I've veen poz for 15 yrs and it still effects mt self esteem.

[bemine2016 in reply to dvvb]

dont feel down ever, its your life and keep it health and happy as you can .....good friends and parents always there for us ....

[Danoherbaculture]

I have met people that seem ok...... But to avoid rejection I say up front on dating sites (+U) Poz undetectable. I think it puts many people off. Also I live rurally and there aren't many folk to choose from on mobile apps. Saves faffing about.

However Many people are informed and also willing to learn. They go away and look it up online and come back saying "didnt realise how much better it is that I thought". Remember People, if you have been through a diagnosis you have had to experience and therefore have an admirable quality of strength. Many people out there are looking for someone they can trust (disclosure), be admiring of and you natural sexiness and charm will bowl them over anyway...... It allows your partners to have their own health issues like diabetes cause at least you will maybe understand them.

I hear the self esteem bit. It can help to know that if you know you status you have an advantage that you can share the responsibility and have crazy wild sex that puts no one at risk.

[SJ65]

Hi, yes there are ignorant and uneducated . There are also those who want to be educated .

i am always up front with every one , any conversation goes along the lines of ..

20 plus years positive , on meds , viral load undetectable and in perfect health ( my GP says I'm healthier than most who are not in my situation ) i will always explain further the situation and facts , i actualy bombard some people.

its like when on these Apps they look for " clean and disease free".....my answer is always " i bathe daily and never wear clothes more than once without washing them ( my personal standard of always looking my best ) . yes i am disease free , but i do carry a Virus which if not monitored can lead to other things etc "

There are people out in the world who are informed and educated , those that aren't are just waiting to be educated .

Don't give up.

[Chamako in reply to SJ65]

I don't get the ddf thing myself anyway. Those are usually the ones that don't play safe in the first place. I always thought of myself as clean too. Just have a small virus that won't go away.

[247sweet]

I've had a few horrible responses to my status overt heydays. But most guys my age understood. Like other people have said, I found it easier to be up front with my status. Iv been happily married now for 7 years now so I did something right.

Good luck

[Chamako in reply to 247sweet]

I've always been up front about. I just don't have any luck meeting someone that is willing to work with it. Glad you found someone to share your life with.

[codyodie]

You are always going to have a few that get scared away because of your status. When I was single, I put it up front in my profile, so there was no awkward Q&A about status. In my experience, they were more accepting of my status because it was one of the first things they read about. Don't be shy, you're going to have rejections. Get used to it, it is part of being HIV positive. Just like any other disease.

[Dorsetguy01]

Yes I feel exactly the same, and avoid any potential hookups. Was in London few weeks ago, went to guys place didn't tell him my status, but after getting down to it he turned abusive physically and verbally and I couldn't stop him as the more I said no the worse it made him so practically gave in so as not too get hurt. I now have to wait for few weeks for a health screen to check for infections.

This has put me off even more now and I'm still bruised 3 weeks later.

[Chamako in reply to Dorsetguy01]

You should do something about this. If not for yourself for the next victim.

[pauldecle Partner ForumLink]

Did you report any of this to the Police?

[Dorsetguy01 in reply to pauldecle]

No, just wanted to get out of there, plus having to tell someone like police, told few friends but didn't go into great detail..put down to bad experience, shit happens!!!