My husban has complex PTSD as well as his ABi (which was the result of a heart attack 18 months ago). I have been trying to give him and us the 3 years the specialists said it would take for his personality and being to stabilize, and I thought I could get there. But 3 days ago he was made redundant (he has been back at work full time for 9 months) and within 12 hours of getting the money he went a bought a motor bike iwthout even telling me - he just left the receipt on the kitchen bench the night before he picked up the bike. We needed that money to try and survive until/if he can get another job, but he did not care about that. When I tried to talk to him about it he turned it on my (as he always does) and left (again as he always does - leaving me with no idea of when he will be home or even if he will be home). Unfortunately that has been the final straw for me. I cannot take the complete disregard for me, the complete disrespect for the family and the lack of care about anything outside him. I know he loves me and I love him so much. But I have told him that if there is any chance at all of our relationship surviving he needs to move out and we need to start dating again so see if we can get to know each other again and build a new us. He has the redundancy money (although I believe he will blow through it in about a month as his ptsd and abi leave him with no ability to manage money - which he will not acknowledge). I am at a point where I feel he needs to learn to stand on his own feet again - living by himself and looking after himself rather than relying on my to do everything shopping,cooking, cleaning etc... if he could hold down a full time job he can look after himself! I know that once he moves out we are over - there will not be any dating - he will not commit hiimself to it. I still have not stopped crying - this is all so far from what I hoped for. But he is so wound up in 'finding himself' he has admitted he has no space for me or us and will not create such a space as it is not important to him at the moment and he cannot tell me when he may be at a stage where he can or wants to. I know in my head this is the right thing to be doing (I have no iea how to explain it to my 2 boys - his step sons who love him soooo much) but my heart is breaking.
Sorry for the long post but this seems to one of the very few safe places fo rme to tell it how it is for me - thank you fo reading, Keg90