My last (long) post on here was a brief explanation about my mTBI and post concussion syndrome, its impact on my life, and the wretched combination of living with cognitive deficits and a drug-induced movement disorder (tardive dyskinesia).
I saw an earlier post that someone has put a day ago about feeling suicidal and thinking of death, and I know this is an extreme reaction to (seemingly) solvable problems, but occasionally it does seem appealing.
I couldn't ever go through with it, as I'm too scared and have too much to live for - my daughter and family would be devastated forever - but if I could just relieve my suffering for even a day, and go back to the old me, it would make me feel happy. I know this is an unrealistic attitude, and that practicing mindfulness and acceptance, a healthy lifestyle etc is far more useful and positive, but I do honestly get days when it is all too much and I seriously hate... my... brain.
Please give me some strategies on how to move on from the 'woe is me' victim mentality, and appreciate all the things I still have... life is still amazing, I just can't see it at the moment.
As well as mTBi/PCS, I have pre-existing depression, so I know how you're feeling. Some stategies I've learnt about, though admittedly not great at doing myself yet, are:
-keeping a positive log of things that have gone well, good things people say etc.
-Keeping a gratitude diary - write one thing a day you are thankful for.
-Mindfulness/meditation
- go for a short walk, do a spot of gardening, something else that gets you out of the house, in nature, even if it's for ten minutes.
Hope you feel better about yourself and life soon.