Dating sites

[spideyman]

There a well known computer dating site whos advert says "If you don't like your imperfection.........." I cant help but finish off this advert "No other bugger will"

[razyheath43]

LOL no one is perfect anyway!

[angelite]

This did make me laugh !

Sorry if things are not going well for you on this front but at least you can add GSOH to your profile ! : )

Take care,

Angela x

[angelite in reply to angelite]

PS. What dating sites do you go on ? Is it just the mainstream or disability sites ? Do you go to Headway or similar meetings where you could meet a range of people also with BI ?

[RogerCMerriman in reply to angelite]

I personally have always prefured face to face, but I'm quite a expansive talker. As I've got older women are more likely to start up conversations though that's more because I present "safe" rather than lustworthy!

[angelite in reply to RogerCMerriman]

It's funny you should say that, Roger. I used to be very shy , especially around the opposite sex but find I am far more comfortable having a conversation now , since the visible disability. I suppose I feel safer, with the obvious disability, that I will be viewed more as down to earth rather than potential flirting material ! ( Not that I ever was lol ! )

I also like to challenge people's perceptions of disability - so many people often see the physical effects and assume my mind is equally disabled ! Or think that I am more limited in my activities. Some of the surprised faces when I get up to have a dance with my stick : ))

I won't be boxed or contained these days - my outlook has certainly changed and I intend to enjoy myself : ) I have had to learn to get over any embarrassment I had about the way I move, since I am no longer able to quietly blend in and likely to attract attention anyway ! It has really been quite liberating ! : ) x

[RogerCMerriman in reply to angelite]

Should point out I'm married and have a very visa bl wedding ring, I work with young women, so have settled into being "work dad"

Which further adds into "safe"

[angelite in reply to RogerCMerriman]

We never married, I think because he was 43 when we got together and had been twice married with grown up children, we felt it was inappropriate somehow. Have been together ( quick calculation of son's age ! ) 23 years and still devoted : )

Maybe if we wore rings it would help to announce our status but sometimes depending on the morals/ dogged persistence of some I have run in to on a night out rings may not make a difference !

I feel that people view me as safe too, now that I am older and with external problems. Somehow my experience has given me greater insight, confidence has had to grow to deal with it and I am more relaxed and comfortable in conversation now.

It is a good place to be : ) x

[spideyman in reply to angelite]

No matter which dating sites you go on, they are all the same people.

You can join 1 dating site and suddenly you find you are on other sites.

I had a woman once quiz why I was on a single parents dating site despite not having any kids.

My info had been passed on to other sites.

Theres also pseudo profiles on sites so if your subscription is about to run out then a fake profile will show interest and youll sign up for another month.

I know most of the tricks used.

[angelite in reply to spideyman]

Oh, I see. I had no idea about this but glad you are clued up.

Do they still have the friendship columns in newspapers ? My neighbours met and got married this way. x

[spideyman in reply to angelite]

Newspaper dating columns are the worst as everyone lies on them and you pay about £5 a minute on the phone to have some moron READ their add to you that you have anyway

[headchild]

Dating sites can be hurtful places to visit.

So many people who are not genuine.

My daughter has used them but many time wasters on them she gets disheartened

[sospan]

One of the things they say about a head injury is that it is a "very lonely injury" only we know what it is truly like. Friends and family tend to keep their distance sometimes their choice, sometimes ours. Our symptoms quite often prevent us going to places where we used to because we don't like the crowds, the noise or the bright lights or it is simply too draining.

Inevitably a lot of us draw inwards and become more and more isolated. Without companionship let alone someone special in must be very difficult.

Finding friendship one of the dating sites with their fixation on looks would be hard enough at the best of times with the demands our injures give would be even more so.

I don't know what the answer is, but the only way I guess is to be out in the real world and hope the path with someone special crosses

best of luck