Grading your return.: I'm sort of assembling a plan... - Headway

Headway

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Grading your return.

B_S_A profile image
22 Replies

I'm sort of assembling a plan for getting back to it, I've tried a few times, but these seizures have been keeping me in check. Since there's no arguing with them, I just have to work with them. That being said, I refuse to accept that they will ruin going back to university for me, so I'm heading back tomorrow.

My parents are driving me back tomorrow (it's a 3hr journey bless em), and my plan is to sleep over there, and get the train home. I used to stay a lot longer, but since then these seizures have gotten much worse.

The last time I went back, my parents took me up, I stayed over at my house at uni, and then they took me back the next day. So this plan isn't any different, except I'm coming back on the train, and I'm on more medication now. That is, by definition, progress, if only a little.

Now parents being parents (which I'm sure some of you are) obviously they want me to lock down until the end of time just be sure that I'm safe. I'm young, but I've thought this through, I hate having seizures, especially when I'm not home, so I'm only going for one night like last time, and I will be coming home on the train, which is an improvement, and that's exactly what I need; measurable improvement.

I'm sure a lot of you guys have families to take care of and such, and to you, I give a lot of praise. I struggle to watch my own back, never mind anyone else's.

Feels like I'm 13 again :D

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B_S_A profile image
B_S_A
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22 Replies
cat3 profile image
cat3

I think this is a good plan for someone as spirited as you. I've never suffered with seizures so forgive my ignorance, but do you carry any sort of i.d. to inform others of your condition in case of emergency ?

But remember that, so long as people carry mobiles, you are surrounded by help and support in the event of a seizure, and with that in mind, you can hopefully relax and enjoy your journey home...........and the sense of achievement it will bring. :-) xx

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to cat3

Trouble is, I never know if I'm doing the right thing, it's such trial and error. Thanks :)

I don't, but get an aura before each seizure that lasts about a minute or two, which is basically my body telling me I'm about to have one.

I don't think they're on board, and they are the providers, so I must make sure that they're all good before I do these kind of things.

cat3 profile image
cat3

It takes courage, relying on willpower and hope when you're facing uncertainty, and I applaud you for going ahead and testing out your plans for a return to uni.

Good luck Ben & 'see' you Tues.?

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to cat3

Myeh, I came home today, I think they would have gone mad for the night if I had stayed. Still, it's a win.

this is the brain injured and parent head speaking........like cat says carry some I.d.

You can write/type a small card (credit card size) and carry it in your wallet titled.....

In case of emergency, with your name, address, a contact number and a brief explanation.....it just saves time and confusion in the very unfortunate event anything happens.

I have to have someone with me when i go out, but I carry the headway brain injury card in all my purses for just such an event. ( ive not got loads of money, I'm just fussy and like to colour coordinate :) )

It also stops people jumping to the wrong conclusion/ assumption about you and gets you the right help as soon as poss. (back in the day, i would have assummed...I'm ashamed of that now...)

All that said....good luck on your journey and return to uni....be safe and takecare :)

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to

I made it back today, I'll consider the card, it's probably a good idea. Thanks for the concern anyway :)

Stubborn as always.

in reply to B_S_A

I WEAR A MEDICAL BRACELET SAYING I'VE HAD AN ABI & I'VE GOT EPILEPSY IN CASE I FIT IN THE STREET. IT'S QUITE SMALL AS I HAVE TINY GIRLY WRISTS. NOT PARTICULARLY ATTRACTIVE BUT PEOPLE WILL SEE IT STRAIGHT AWAY AS IT'S ON MY WRIST. ALSO HAS MY 'WHO TO CONTACT IN AN ERGENCY' DETAILS ENGRAVED ON THE BACK. THEY DO PENDANTS AS WELL MAY BE BETTER FOR MEN WHO DON'T LIKE BRACELETS. BEING FEMALE I WENT FOR WRIST.

Molly15 profile image
Molly15

Morning B_S_A.

Well done you, you give me such encouragement with your positive and determined attitude. These damned seizures are scary things, we are on edge constantly waiting for the next one, but you are definitely fighting back in the best way for you, and making sure your life is not spoilt by these awful things.

I applaud you, I can so feel for your parents, its bad enough having a husband with all these problems, I cant imagine what it must be like to have a son or daughter, who you have to let go and cope in the wide world.

All the very best, and I look forward to hearing about how everything goes.

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to Molly15

Ergh, it's all such a mess. We saw some good improvement before all this recent stuff.

Thanks for the love.

Kirk5w7 profile image
Kirk5w7

I am so lucky I don't have seizures and I know how hard it is to go out on your own anyway, well done, the first trip is always the worst I'm sure you will cope fine you have such determination to cope regardless, again well done love Janet x

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to Kirk5w7

It feels good to get on with stuff like that, but I've been dragged back to square one. In fact, worse than square one, I wasn't having so many seizures back then. Tis a cruel situation.

Thanks.

Kirk5w7 profile image
Kirk5w7 in reply to B_S_A

I hope this is only a minor setback for you x

cat3 profile image
cat3

Ben, what exactly has happened ? Did you have a seizure ? If not, why are you so disappointed.......?? :-( X

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to cat3

No seizures, but I used to stay at uni for a week at a time, and this time I only went for the night. Worried parents you see (I was worried too, but I wanted to stay over for the night). Feels like I'm going backwards, it's disappointing.

cat3 profile image
cat3 in reply to B_S_A

That certainly is not going backwards. Did you come back on the train ?

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A

Nope, parents took me there and back. It's fine, just a little disappointing.

cat3 profile image
cat3 in reply to B_S_A

OK so we're seeing some perspective now. Just a little disappointing is not going back to square one,,,,,,,it's a small step nearer to your goal, and since there was the small matter of a brain haemorrhage it's actually a significant step.

When there are concerns about possible adverse effects this is the best strategy........one small experimental step which can be built on. Maybe next time you can come back on the train the same day........then progress to an overnight stay..........whatever feels right (for both you and your parents). If you can compromise a little I'm sure their confidence will grow & they'll be able to let go more readily.

I'm going to sleep now & I suggest you do the same.........I'm seeing 1.30am

Night night Ben. x

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to cat3

Yeah I was up waaaay too late.

Thanks that makes me feel better :)

I completely agree, now just need to get the parents on board.

cat3 profile image
cat3 in reply to B_S_A

Glad you've lightened up a little.

You WILL get to do these things...........that's probably obvious to everyone but you.

Take care. ;-) x

B_S_A profile image
B_S_A in reply to cat3

Thanks Cat :)

Stardrop profile image
Stardrop

One of my daughters used to have fits, but she grew out of them in her teenage years (there weren't epileptic but were scary at the time. School didn't want her to swim but another parent who was a qualified life guard volunteered to be in the pool (she was never needed). I was always worried that she would be with someone who would panic.

Anyway both daughters joined St John and whilst at Uni signed up for a lot of duties, There are a lot of first aiders in halls of residence. It's a pity you couldn't be in a University house with trained first aiders in the same flat. Can you stay in University accommodation all through? Might give your parents peace of mind.

I would say do not drink as people see yet another student laid on the ground and step over or walk around. I once had a very bad migraine when I had just moved house, got to the train station couldn't remember what town I lived in, speech slurred and the audience was trying to make up it's mind I could hear old ladies saying 'she doesn't look like a drunk' and 'can't small drink on her'. I remembered where I lived and said the word 'migraine' and they put me on a train.

Hope it all goes well.

Nks425 profile image
Nks425

I think it's great:) I have two one is 21 and the other 17 going off to Uni in August. You have to try to keep living. I think "baby steps" is the way to go. That gives your parents time adjust as well. I think having some sort of ID is a great idea. I absolutely think it's marvelous! Prayers and hugs to you .

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