Due date approaching and no Bfp - Fertility Network UK

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Due date approaching and no Bfp

FrancyItaly profile image
28 Replies

I miscarried in September and the due date is approaching at the end of March. I really thought I would be pregnant by then but it doesn’t look like it! So sad and gutted 😔

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FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly
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28 Replies
RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat

Awh dear 😢😖😕😞

Such a hard road 😞 sending you hugs 🤗 I can only imagine what you are going through as I haven’t been through that myself , yet. But Ive walked beside several very good friends who have and it’s tough tough tough . Just so unfair .

Sending hugs your way ,

Always best being honest,

Hugs to your heart today,

Hoping you can find a way to lift your chin and breathe as you grieve for the ‘what could have been’ yet was lost.

Poor pet 😘

💐💖💐

Rhinocat x 💐

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to RhinoCat

Thank you for your lovely message x

RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat in reply to FrancyItaly

How are you today ? 💐

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to RhinoCat

Thank you for asking. I went out with my old team last night (I was their Manager) they cheered me up a bit! I didn’t want to have any alcohol and I ended up having a beer, g&t and a glass of wine! I slept like an angel and I’m very relaxed in bed now with my cat sleeping on my chest. So I’m doing well. I have an interview in 2 days too, I quit my job in October as I needed a break (had lots of children and parents around because I was managing a nursery school). I’m starting to feel a bit bored now and it might be good for me to get busy again soon, maybe just not in a school. Let’s see! Still struggling with pregnant friends around, but I hope I will soon join them!

I read now your are in your 2ww, how are you coping? Best of luck to you! I hope you get your bfp soon!

RhinoCat profile image
RhinoCat in reply to FrancyItaly

Sounds like you had the exact night that you needed 😍 I’d love a gin 🤣 you are defo right taking a break from that working situation , too close to the bone! 😖 hopefully applying for new things will give you the forward motion to keep your heart rising in the right direction 😘💖💖💖💖🙏🏻

Yep, I’m in my 2ww.... it’s so long and gets harder by the day. It’s been tough with my husband away but he gets back tomorrow 🎉 so I can take my hormonal rollercoaster 🎢 out on him 🤪

Planning on having another nice chilled day with a walk to get fresh air and out of the house .

Hope you have a restful day 💖💐

Rhinocat x

ttcemmie profile image
ttcemmie

Last week was my due date and I thought I would be fine except for the day itself, but I struggled the whole week up to it. I still think about my miscarriage and my lost baby every day. Sending you lots of love and wishes that you will be pregnant soon.

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to ttcemmie

Aw sorry to hear you struggled the whole week 😔 thank you for your well wishes, same to you! x

I’ve passed 3 due dates it was hard at the time but does get easier. Im not pregnant either my last pregnancy was over a year ago (I did have a chemical but it was one positive pregnancy test then period) so wasn’t the same. I’ve not given up but it’s not looking like it’s going to happen for us.

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to

Thank you for your message, sorry to hear that. I’ll never give up until I have at least one baby. All the best to you x

So sorry for your loss. I miscarried in june 2018 and would have been due boxing day 2018. It was a really upsetting period and even more so after TTC for 5 years. I also went through expecting to get pregnant straight away too, it puts a lot of stress on yourself. All of the milestones etc, try not to dwell too much. I can tell you that it does get easier but it will take time. I am in a positive place now.

Let yourself feel all of the emotions you go through, talking to friends helped me and being positive. I'm here if you need to talk/rant/ask questions xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to Florencenightingale

Thank you for your message, I’m sorry about your loss. It’s surely easier now compared to a couple of months ago, I’m just so impatient now and want to become a mum! Hope it will happen soon.

Florencenightingale profile image
Florencenightingale in reply to FrancyItaly

I was exactly the same, it's so infuriating. But the stress wont be helping. We are now starting IVF and hoping for our happy ever after. I hope you get yours xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to Florencenightingale

Thank you so much and I hope your IVF will be successful. It’s infuriating to know many of us for a reason or another are having this struggles! Although it helps me to feel less alone to know I can talk to someone. Hopefully soon we will all get to take our baby home and it will be extra special x

Florencenightingale profile image
Florencenightingale in reply to FrancyItaly

Thank you. We are being positive about it all, fingers crossed. It does help to know you arent the only one. It happened to a few of my friends and they have been great. I hope you've got some support. I'm here if you need anything xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to Florencenightingale

Thank you for being there. Luckily none of my friends experienced it and they are not able to fully understand and support me x

Florencenightingale profile image
Florencenightingale in reply to FrancyItaly

Well I'm always here if you need a rant or to ask questions you can inbox me if you need x

Shelleybean profile image
Shelleybean

I can completely relate to this.. felt so sad and broken when my due date came and went.. we’d had another ivf cycle in between which was unsuccessful (as was the next one) and that was a real blow as had kind of expected it to work as we’d come so close the first time. Baby would’ve been due on my sister’s bday and I will never forget them.. thankfully that little one helped me find the strength to keep going until got a bfp again.

Such a difficult time, if you think you could cope with it then I would definitely try to plan something nice for around/ just after the time.. a spa day or night away or something to give you something to look forward to. Sending lots of hopeful wishes that you don’t have to wait too long for your rainbow 🌈 💕 xx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to Shelleybean

Thank you for your message. I’m sorry for your loss, it’s so unfair! 😔 How long did you take to get a Bfp after your miscarriage? I’m becoming so impatient, the fact I don’t ovulate often makes me think it will take ages still for me

Shelleybean profile image
Shelleybean in reply to FrancyItaly

It was almost exactly a year and 3 more rounds of IVF later. Completely get the impatience and feelings of desperation which start to creep in. You’ve been through a tough time so go easy on yourself xx

kitscat profile image
kitscat

I am so sorry you feel like this! I know exactly how you feel. My good friend went through ivf the same time as me, she was successful I was not. Her due date is tomorrow. Exactly the same date as mine would have been as we had the same transfer date. If I hadn’t had my first ectopic in 2018, I would have a 1 year old now. It’s horrendous but I’m trying to move forward now. Keep busy, keep positive and our time will come.

I got quite drunk today with my mum then carried on drinking with my husband and had a great day!!. At the moment I’m trying to do lots of non pregnancy related things and prioritise what I need. Slowly I’m getting there. Thinking of you xxx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to kitscat

Thank you for your message. I was out with old colleagues last night, I didn’t want to drink but I ended up having a beer, g&t and a glass of white wine last night and I don’t regret it!

How are you doing? I thought you had a 7 week scan not long ago right?

kitscat profile image
kitscat in reply to FrancyItaly

Yeh that’s right. Unfortunately it was an ectopic. Incredibly rare as it was an abdominal one, but attached to my ovary, and my second ectopic!😡 So I’ve had to have more surgery. Much better physically now, just taking one day at a time, emotionally. Have follow up appts with my clinic planned, plus we are going to discuss things with another clinic. Plus holidays booked to help the time pass. Life is shit but I can’t change things and I am praying that either my frozen embryos work and/or another round of IVF is successful. We managed a hatching blastocyst, so I’m just hoping I haven’t had too much damage to my ovary from the surgery. The surgeon was confident and very reassuring but this IVF game is a cruel thing, so you just never know. 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🙏🙏🙏 xxxx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to kitscat

Ooooh no!!! I’m so sorry to hear that! As if it wasn’t already painful enough! Why is life so unfair sometimes! I remember reading your posts, I was also in the 2ww and you were saying you were having hot flushes, I had a bfn and my period turned up, but I was happy to read you got a bfp! I really hope you will have your baby very soon and it will be all worth the journey then!

kitscat profile image
kitscat in reply to FrancyItaly

Thank you. I hope you have a BFP soon too xxx

kitscat profile image
kitscat in reply to FrancyItaly

I think sometimes a drink is very good to let your hair down and relax. It was nice to live outside the fertility bubble. I’m trying to do that before my next cycle. I’m not going to waste the next 3 months by just waiting I’m going to have fun and do nice things as I deserve it! So do you! Everyone on this site does! 🥰

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to kitscat

You are right! I already have a trip back home to Italy, one to Valencia to visit my cousin and last night with my old colleagues we promise we’ll go to Amsterdam soon! All trips without my husband lol 🤣

The only time I got pregnant it was a week after I got drunk at a wedding in Greece, so we might as well do it!

Scarlett13 profile image
Scarlett13

I know how you feel. This journey can be so hard. So sad and lonely. But we are all here for you. Don’t give up, keep going, keep positive that your time will come. It took 8 embryos transferred to get pregnant, I’m 35 weeks, so just keep believing xxx

FrancyItaly profile image
FrancyItaly in reply to Scarlett13

Thank you for your messages, I’ve been reading your posts. It’s great you are 35 weeks now! 🥰 I believe it will happen but it seems so far for me and I’m so impatient! I think I would be more relaxed if I didn’t have to be around pregnant friends, that puts so much pressure on me, especially after my miscarriage! I just hope and pray my time will come soon.

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