Potty training tips for withholder

[Lion1982]

Hi all, my three year old daughter has been a poo withholder for about 18 months. About 8 months ago, we did disimpaction and then moved on to a maintenance dose of Movicol, which has kept her regularly pooing in her nappy ever since. However, her withholding behaviours - standing on tiptoes and going rigid - have never really changed, even though she has had very soft/runny poos for 8 months.

We have been supported by a child psychologist, and she suggested we could give potty training a go. We started a couple of weeks ago, and things have gone well with wees. However, my daughter has doubled down on her attempts to withhold her poo, and we have returned to the nightmare of lots of withholding and intermittent soiling - with only very occasional poos on the potty (which are more accidental than intentional).

ERIC have suggested reintroducing pull ups for poo only, and to encourage poos in pull ups in the bathroom/toilet only. Has anyone else done this successfully and, if so, are there any practical tips on how you got it to work? My daughter does not generally like to poo when others are around - she usually retreats to a corner or to the garden, and tells us to go away. And it can take a while until she actually poos. So I'm struggling to envisage her actually doing a poo in this environment. Do we take her to the bathroom and just hang out in there with her, for as long as it takes? I feel like we will have more success if she is left on her own to poo when she is ready - but I can't really leave her on her own in the bathroom for ages...

Thanks in advance!

[ERIC-Charity Partner]

Dear Lion1982 we may have already shared this with you, but it's well worth reading eric.org.uk/children-who-wi...

On our Stool Withholding page you'll find lots of helpful information, and there' s a list of resources at the bottom of the page, including this book: shop.eric.org.uk/products/s...

[Basicilly]

Had a similar case a few years back with our daughter. I spent a year sitting in the toilet with her at regular times playing games/rewards, talking etc It took a month or so before we got a poo in the toilet, slowly but surely she got the hang of it and looked forward to the rewards/celebrations when she did a poo. A few years on and she now poos no bother although we have a backup of movicol in case we notice any withholding. Each child is different but for us although going with her to the toilet did not work initially, after some time it worked wonders creating the routine that eventually removed her stress about it. Best of luck!!