Advice please re: 9 year old boy

[QuickstepMagic]

My son is 9 and regularly soils his pants- he doesn’t seem to be aware that he’s done it. He needs reminding to go to the toilet- I can sense he needs to go for a wee from the dancing and a poo because he’s holding on. Neither are painful when he goes. On other occasions he will go as he knows he needs to. There doesn’t seem to be a pattern. He also wets the bed- this we solved lockdown 1 with an alarm and was dry up until Christmas. I felt all this would sort itself out over time - he was a late talker/Walker/potty trained/bike rider/reader but once he wanted to do these things he did straight away! Any advice?? Where do I start? He’s adamant he doesn’t want to see a doctor.

[Yaleamanda]

He is probably so backed up he has lost the sensation of when he needs to go. you need to clear him out with both osmotic and stimulant laxatives. You need to build in regular toilet sits. The night time wetting will continue until you resolve the bowel issues as it is most likely the bowel putting pressure on the bladder hence the accidents.