How to get my parents to lossen up on me

[Michele1982]

Since I was 7 months old I had real bad seizures all my life I been on medications and had a lot of tests done nothing has worked, until technology got better in 2015 I had one year of big testing done, in 2016 I had brain surgery and a deep Electro test, my last seizure was the night before my surgery since then I have been seizure-free for 2 years and the purpose of that was to be able to live a normal life again, and my mother always said when I'm well then I will be able to do that, butfor some reason she cannot overcome that fear , and nothing seems to help either one of them she won't accept it my doctor has even tried to get some help for the both of them and she denies it, so I'm not sure what to do to get them to give me more Freedom now that I'm well and to relax a bit more, the way they behave sometimes I wonder why did I go through all this trouble all these years and getting better when I'm going to continue to live the same kind of life as before what's not even worth doing, but many people that are going through the same, but when you are doing so good you have less reason to be that way and so controlling I was just curious how everyone else manages to do that, or if somebody can give me some advice what to do

[Lj08]

Its a hard one you know how you feel and as much as you tell your mum how well your feeling I doubt she will ever believe you, your parents have seen you have fits for many years and to see you well may be too good to be true and they could be waiting for the worst not that they want it to happen, all you can do is carry on looking after yourself and don’t worry about about them loosening up or giving you a break, it really is a parent child thing, let them see how well your doing instead of telling them or even arguing with I’m not saying that is what you do, just let them see it, it is so annoying believe me I know my dad watches me if I’m ill or if I drop something more than once, he thinks I’m having a fit but I ignore him and carry on and slowly he calms down and relaxes and thinks of me of his daughter instead of his daughter the epileptic.

[Michele1982 in reply to Lj08]

It is and I think they know it and even when mainly my mother has always said all that she wanted was for me to get better and be able to do what I wanted to, but like you said I think it has happened too fast for them, that now they have a hard time accepting it and do not know how to let go, every once in awhile I have tried to talk to them but now I don't because like you said it doesn't do any good no matter how you do it, so I really do not tell him anything what's bad though is if you were even to go outside or somewhere with a friend for the day if they did not want to they will not even let you go, and that's what's bad if they don't start somewhere they're always going to have that fear, and sometimes you are in a spot you do not even know what to do like you say do not argue with them because it does get a lot worse but there are sometimes you are with them you hear everything they are saying but like my mother if you do not answer her she will tell you right away don't you ignore me, but with a very ugly attitude, so if you answer her she will get real upset but if you don't answer you get in trouble for not answering lol so you are stuck, my doctor had to even tell her you need to start letting go of her little at a time and it is time for you stop sleeping with her as well that might start to help you get used to that, that's the only thing she has done so far, and no I also doubt either one of them will ever believe me because if not by now they would have or also changed a little bit but if after 36 years neither one of them believe me yet I doubt they ever will either they are way too old for that, and I put up with it for too long I don't want to keep on living this way like you said it is very frustrating and after so long you get tired of it too, and she herself says it whether she is upset or not if I want to treat you like a little kid I will do that, just think if she even says it herself, so sometimes I'm not even sure why do I keep on trying because as long as I'm here there is no hope like I said you are stuck in a very bad spot you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't, and like you said let them see it , but it could also take them another 30 years the way they are going by that time why do I care anymore , I am hoping I do not even have to be here that long anymore

[Michele1982 in reply to Lj08]

Ok thanks yes most of the time now that's all I do I agree with them with everything even when I know it's not true and hoping that they will see it soon because the bad thing is if they don't and I think they already know that themselves they just won't accept it because my surgery was 2 years ago since then I have done very good I have not gotten sick since my surgery and I think I recovered too fast for them but in the meantime they will not let me do anything with my life not cut me any slack and like you say they watch you like a hawk she will not let me out of her sight apparently they have to let you move on in life but the way they are and they are going I'm not sure they're ever going to let me do that I'll keep the bucket before that day ever happens lol

[wul004]

Hi bit of a Bummer there Pal!??....I think a very Good First step for you (where ever you reside on this green & Lovely Planet?...Would be;- 24 year old bottle of Glenfiddich Malt Whiskey!!!.....

it has no set medicinal value....--cure's no desease .But!!….you will have NONE Hangover's!!

BUT..!!! You WILL! Feel GREAT!!...RELAXED....and Give out an aura of 'Goodness' to all things/people around...That your parents will relax./Chill out./.and Enjoy Life once again!??!!..achieving this effect through Spiritual Osmosis!!!..He.he.he.

Love..Kisses..+Long Life...Wully Gimix!!

[Michele1982 in reply to wul004]

Thanks I hope so I will give it a try hopefilly it will work I think they are pretty much just set in their ways mayne that's why I don't see much of a difference and why they don't chance but I hope something will but I will keep you imformed 😀hugs and kisses Michele

[wul004]

Hi Hope your life is a wee bit Looser??..Sorry for this Huge late comment but am just back home after a wee 9 day stint in my Local i.c.u.(Brand New!!),Following emergency admittance after a HUGE! MAD! Monky Seizure,(really scare me now!!),I had a small?? thought of your parents!!;--Maybe they are just attention seeking??

[Michele1982 in reply to wul004]

Oh okay don't worry about it thank you very much though I'm sorry to hear that I hope everything is going very well and when my parents know they are still the same that's what I was saying that I don't think they will ever change many other people have said the same thing I was for two days with a friend because we went to her son's graduation party and she said the same thing they cannot understand why they are behaving that way and they don't think they will change either that they are just in denial and now we're having a hard time letting go, so I am not sure but in a few months our friends that I was with for 3 days they might be moving in the next few months and her son is going to college now her husband is out of town a lot with work so I might just move with her if they are not going to at least try and change because they also know how I am doing in my situation and we get along just fine and help each other but can also live a normal life as well so soon I'm going to have to make some decision for myself if things don't get better