The Silence Between Us

[jupiterjane]

I awake in a panic

with my heart

in my throat.

Gasping for air,

my mind searching

for answers.

I feel like I'm

moving in circles,

unable to stop

and getting nowhere.

The heavy door

that protects me from

all my worries

has burst wide open,

releasing

and overwhelming me

with all those things

I am afraid of.

I hate my pain

the physical and

the emotional.

It is an all consuming,

life altering waste

of precious time.

It steals away my life

and derails my future.

Every day I die a little.

I can't seem to clear out

these clouds of dread.

My family doesn't

understand why I can't

"shake it off"

and go on.

I can't explain it.

A silence grows

between us.

A growing disease of

"Lovedoneitus" and

the building intolerance

of chronic pain.

Another pill added

to an already full

medication ritual

just dulls my already

altered mind.

The anxiety returns.

My heart beats wildly

and theres a gnawing,

rolling sensation in the

pit of my stomach.

My mouth is dry,

and my words have

no voice.

It's all around me,

there's no place to run.

I curl up into a ball

and rock.

Silently I cry.

Jupiterjane

[Annie81963]

Wow! This sounds like me some days.

[DeParkiePoet]

Voice my screams

Speak my dreams

Let me live in the in-betweens

I have lost (it) seems

Now I'll have to run my schemes

I can't be on just any teams

I hear your words of desperation

and find I'm in the same situation

[grammieof3]

Wow guys wow you have turned something so ugly into poetry

[mccshe]

Amazingly expressive of true turmoil.....I know just how you feel!! Thankyou for sharing!!

[jupiterjane]

Thanks for all the kind words and expressive response poetry! What a great bunch of people we have here!

Jupiterjane