A little afraid, my husband just diagnosed. I have m.s. and don't know how I can help him. He comes home from hospital this weekend.

[Cassie59]

My husband was in hospital as they thought he had burnout syndrome, now confirmed Parkinson's. I have m.s since 1994 and I know my hubby has enough to do helping and worrying about me. I am very insecure about our future together. Does his care and worry about me aggravate his situation?

[TaniaV]

I have to be honest stress is a huge factor with Parkinson's however he has cared for you since 94... this isn't like he had PD 1st and then you got sick.. he is already aware of how to handle your illness. My boyfriend has epilepsy and when we 1st got together I would get really stressed when he have one since I didn't know what to do or how to handle it .. but now I don't ... it comes second nature to me... so it doesn't make my PD go into high gear... I have to say that being with someone who has a incurable disease its nice because you both will have such a better understanding of what the other is going thru .. a kind of like unspoken knowledge between you two. Me and my boyfriend think it makes us even stronger! Even our friends call us the POWER COUPLE ha ha

Good luck!

[CJ49]

I'm so sorry to hear you and your husband are going through difficult times.

If your husband gets stressed that will agitate the PD symptoms.

My husband "also" takes care of me as best as he can....he has "issues" with his health too...(Arthritis, and pre-diabetese are the main ones.)...He's always been a very "hyperactive" ....I finally figured out that's part of his personality.

You know that line in the wedding vows that goes...."for better or worse; in sickness and in health".....well this is exactly what it means.....My husband and I have learned that a good sense of "humor" goes a "long way", when it comes to handling life.......Many people would call it a "sick" sense of humor, but you know what?...........I'd much rather laugh than cry....Don't get me wrong, I do my share of crying too, but.....Working on life "together" is much better than working on it "alone."

I feel that you and your husband love each other enough to "handle" this time in you lives "together"......It'll be "challenging" at times, but I read a quote from someone on this site, it goes something like....."Life is not supposed to be this way.....but "that's the way it is.......and it's "how you handle it, that makes the difference."

[Cassie59]

Thank you, when my husband comes home I will show him the comments, as I am certain he is also making his thoughts about us both. Hope we can follow your example, a power pair. Wishing you all the best.

[Carrigan in reply to Cassie59]

Good luck to you both, I have no advise but remember why you love each other and try your best

[ronn]

I was in my second year w/ PD when my wife fell and badly smashed her shoulder. The role reversal caused additional stress which did increase the severity of my symptoms temporarily but, as we both learned to dwell less on our own hurts, the problems grew less. My daughter also introduced me to this site which has been wonderful therapy, allowing active participation or passive observation with others having similar problems. It has been a great stress reducer for me and even greater, I am sure, for my wife who no longer has to listen to my Parkie complaints. Perhaps your husband will find it beneficial also.

Wishing you the best.

[JAYNIE]

I envy all of you, as you have a spouse (mate) to help when needed. be thankful

for the support you have. Relax and know it will work out for the best you will see....

and,,,,,,,,,,,,,enjoy each day !!

[Jupeter]

So sorry to hear of your situation - you really have drawn the short straw.

As far as the Parkinson's is concerned, it will move as it wishes - it could be a slow development. I have been diagnosed for 11 years and I still drive OK at the age of 76.

Your husband should know that the medication will make a big difference.

You should not worry about him - he is more likely to be worrying about you!

My wife (69) has Nocturnal Epilepsy, brought on by stress. She worries about me (though I tell her not to) and worries about her 90 year old mother who has developing dementia. Her medication causes her to have falls due to balance problems. The stress causes fits. Worrying about me and her mum only makes things worse.

So, I guess what I am saying is, it isn't easy but try not to worry, it is likely to affect your condition and won't improve his. As pointed out by TaniaV, your husband knows how to care for you and the medication should ensure that he can continue with that care for a long time.

Best wishes

[Cassie59 in reply to Jupeter]

I am overwhelmed by the caring remarks from you all, and hope that my husband will also draw some help from this page. Once again thank you.

[shasha]

i tpo am so sorry to hear about your kind and caring husbands diagnosis - i am sure thuogh that with help from meds and family ? you will be abke to care for one another - God bless you both

[RoDias]

I am sorry to hear that in addition to helping you with your MS battle that your husband will also be battling PD. Fortunately, I am in good health and I'm able to help my husband with his PD. I do know that no matter what comes our way that my religious belief helps me. Look to your Higher Power and you will find the strength you need to help both of you through this. Hope I'm not over stepping by saying that my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your husband.

[PatV]

Don't blame yourself but now you are both caregivers. Caregivers need to take care of themselves and get support so you can support each other. I live alone and have to depend on friends and family.