its 2 am again...your not sure if your awake or asleep..somewhere in between, never quite satisfying, straddling the fence so to speak. Every cell of your body is screaming to get off the fence...be awake or sleep just make either one happen. Screammming...this is a reflection of the inability of the Dr's to address your bodies needs.....Toss...Turn Groan drifffffftttt.....toss repeat...this is where the proverbial "rubber meets the road".....Toss, Turn Groannnn..repeat...during the daylight we drag ourselves up mount everest a hundred times a day.....never quite enough air, never quite warm, never quite comfortable...Robin....Robin...this is when your mind turns to Robin....the last refuge of suffering...a refuge in your own mind slightly different for each of us....its ok to start thinking about Robin...its ok to save the last refuge of guaranteed peace close to you ....its the last move in the chessgame...play it close to your vest and only get it out when your done....Toss, Turn, Groan, repeat, then climb everest.....repeat....Hang tough 2 am'ers, till you cant, then embrace your personal Robin....the fence is not forever..it just feels like it.....your quiet but your here...your not alone.....its ok to be weary....its ok......
References: 1. Chocolat the book
2. chocolat the movie
3. Robin
Written by
beehive23
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I usually awaken around 2 AM, give or take. I transfer to my recliner and abide in Qigong meditation until dawn. I usually fall asleep for part of that time and that is okay too.
I’ve been awake since 2am. It’s killing me!! I can’t get anything done. Went out for coffee at 6am and was surprise to find so many people up and about despite the dark and the rain.
It’s nearly 2am here, in the USA, and I’m awake, as usual! I sure can relate to the tossing and turning, and trying to find a comfortable way to lie in bed! Half awake and half asleep this time of night, is like a la la land! Betwixt and between! Sometimes, the story of my life, with PD! We commiserate at 2 am, and beyond, and, somehow, gather the courage, to face another struggling day, living with advancing Parkinson’s! Sometimes, I wonder, will tomorrow be the day, that I can’t push myself to walk, much more, or, what new challenge awaits me? Will I be able to overcome, and, somehow, get through the day, without falling, losing my balance, or completely giving up, with no energy, and have to go lie down, drained of all energy!
If you can't sleep....why not read? Or learn a new language. Or if you have a home gym you can work out. Right I'm I'm struggling to do a pull-up. I used to do 50. Now I'd be happy doing one.
i work out in pulmonary critical care unit 2x a week, i cannot work out at night and i can no longer focus on reading even though i used to devour books....i meditate to get me through nights...but thanks for the ideas! hang tough!
I have PD and also Hashimotos, a bit of a double whammy, and insomnia is common with both. I had insomnia, waking at 2am no hope of getting back to sleep. Then I discovered histamine intolerance. Made a few changes to my diet and ‘bingo’. Still not perfect but so much better. Most night getting through to 5+am. I googled and found a lot written, a lot of which made sense, including that histamine is a wake-up substance, which the body starts producing at around 2-3 am,and also has the effect of blocking dopamine.I had been advised by various integrative Drs that the likelihood that I have gut issues, and this would be helped by eating live yoghurt, kefir, kimchi or sauerkraut. These are some of the biggest culprits (for me anyway) for people with histamine intolerance.
One of the best things about the change is that I go to bed now anticipating a reasonable night’s sleep, which I am certain helps.
I can totally relate to the tossing and turning and in my case stiff calf muscles and cramps and an over active mind that will not calm down and allow me to relax ...happy days and nights
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