So much perseverance : My husband was... - Cure Parkinson's

Cure Parkinson's

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So much perseverance

meadowlark6581 profile image
13 Replies

My husband was diagnosed with PD in 2011. He’s always been hardworking and determined, probably a Type A personality would describe him well. He is on disability now. One thing I’ve noticed is that he will repeatedly try to do things over and over. For example - zipping his jacket. He must have tried for 30 minutes the other night, practicing zipping his jacket until he was able to do it.

Please, this is NOT a complaint. I know he could have apathy and not even want to try! The curious part is he never gets frustrated. He just perseveres with his attempts. If it were me, I’d be through the roof with frustration.

My question is, do people with Parkinson’s have a higher tolerance for frustration? Is there some part of the disease progression that seemingly makes them unflappable? Again please don’t think I’m complaining, it’s more an observation I’m asking about. Thank you.

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meadowlark6581 profile image
meadowlark6581
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13 Replies
meadowlark6581 profile image
meadowlark6581

Also we have an agreement that I won’t jump in and help him unless he asks for me to do so. Even though it might be easier for me to do the task for him, I want to respect his dignity.

Juliegrace profile image
Juliegrace

My mom and I both have PD. I am relatively calm overall, although when I am off my meds I do not handle stressful situations very well, but I am accepting of my limitations. I am almost 58 and symptoms started 10 years ago. My mother, on the other hand, was diagnosed in her mid 60s and did quite well into her mid 70s, but now as she has become less able seethes with frustration. At 82 she still doesn't accept her limitations which creates all sorts of problems for everyone around her. So, my answer is no, not all PWP are unflappable.

park_bear profile image
park_bear

For normal people repetitive movements become programmed and can be executed with little conscious attention. Walking, for example. Parkinson's impairs this ability and we must devote conscious attention to movement. So the need for patience in performing motor activities is imposed upon us.

sleezy profile image
sleezy

No, not all people with Parkinson's are so calm about having to keep trying to accomplish things that used to be done in one try. Your husband has a good attitude.

meadowlark6581 profile image
meadowlark6581 in reply tosleezy

Definitely!

DEAT profile image
DEAT

I do the same. I tried for over 5 mins the other day to do up a bra. I was tempted to call my husband to do it but i wouldnt give in. Once i was trying on a dress and i couldnt get it off over my head. No one was home that day so it took me about 10 minutes of trying before i got it off. We all laugh about these things later. But i dont think im a patient person more stubborn or determined.

meadowlark6581 profile image
meadowlark6581 in reply toDEAT

I love what you wrote. Keeping a sense of humor is important, isn’t it!

Maltipom profile image
Maltipom in reply tomeadowlark6581

I agree keeping sense of humor is very important. My husband and I replaced a toilet in a small bathroom a few weeks ago. We were both lying on our backs on the floor reconnecting the waterline. Afterwards neither one of us could get up off the floor...me with parkinson's and him ten years older. We just laid on floor laughing before working our way back up onto our feet.

But, thenthere are days where l struggle with zipping jacket or taking off a pullover hoodie and I have to will myself not to have a tantrum.

LAJ12345 profile image
LAJ12345

The opposite apples to my husband. He doesn’t want to try anything hard due to apathy. I think you are lucky he is so persistent as I think it probably build new pathways in the brain keeping functionality. Once you stop doing something it is one less thing you can do. If you keep pushing against it you are at least holding your ground even if you are not improving.

meadowlark6581 profile image
meadowlark6581 in reply toLAJ12345

I’m sorry. Apathy is a true enemy. I AM lucky my husband tries so hard.

Johnboy46 profile image
Johnboy46

I was diagnosed 18 months ago. My tremor is in my dominant right hand, so most intricate things are harder. I used to make scale model cars, I don't do that anymore,not because it would take longer but because it wouldn't be up to my standard of finish. Yesterday I spent 30 minutes repairing a bracelet ( 2mm chain) for my wife, it took about 3 times longer to do ,but it wasn't going to beat me. I suppose having the patience to sit and think " I WILL DO THIS" and that PD isn't going to win just yet is the key.

LAJ12345 profile image
LAJ12345 in reply toJohnboy46

Good on you, I think that attitude makes a huge difference.

Icequeen10 profile image
Icequeen10

I was never this calm and accepting.. the disease did something to my thinking..it's like I just don't have the. ,,", strength". Literally & figuratively.. but when I get upset. it lasts a long time.

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