Hi everyone,
I was diagnosed with CLL about 6 years ago W&W. I am concerned about getting Covid. My husband does not wear a mask in public and was just at a weekend memorial celebration with friends - one who had Covid a month ago - no one wore masks My question is - should I stay at my folks for a few days until we can test to see if he is Covid free. My family thinks because I don’t “look sick” that my immune system is fine and I am being ridiculous.
Thank you,
Hi Poolgirl:
There aren’t any easy answers to your predicament. Each of us responds differently to the vaccines and the disease itself. The first thing I’d suggest is keeping up to date in your Covid vaccinations. The new Covid vaccine formulation will hopefully be released later this month. Make sure you get it when available. And as an aside, since you are pretreatment make sure all of your vaccinations are current as vaccinations are more effective pretreatment so use this time wisely.
I’m in the middle of my second treatment and I have two high school age children so I am exposed constantly but so far my vaccinations have protected me. If I come down with Covid symptoms I will promptly contact my GP to get Paxlovid. I think you should have a plan to do the same. I personally wouldn’t move to my parents if I was in your position but we are all different.
Best,
Mark
I just read through your prior posts and see that you went to Australia eight months ago. Reading this made me realize that we all view risk differently. I consider traveling to Australia as a high risk event as I’d be away from my medical support system, on long plane trips where exposure to Covid is high, etc. I assume you didn’t view travel to Australia as a high risk. Conversely, I wouldn’t hesitate to attend a wedding without a mask and I assume you wouldn’t consider this activity. I do try to minimize these events but I don’t avoid them if they are important. For instance, I have a nephew who is getting married next month and I will be there unmasked.
I was at an appointment at Dana Farber last week and I wore a mask as I have for the past several years. When my doctor came into the room he put on his mask and made the comment that about 50% of his patients wear masks and 50% don’t. I hadn’t even noticed before this point that some folks weren’t wearing masks in the hospital but I was surprised upon reflection that 50% of his CLL patients would go into a hospital setting without a mask. Again, how we view risk is different and I assume a reflection of past experiences like how many infections we have had, etc.
Best,
Mark
I do not think this situation warrants a stay with your parents.
Instead, I agree with Mark that you should keep your vax status up to date, make sure you have a path to get meds if you need them, and try to focus on continuing to live healthy for the next few days so you keep your immune system in the best shape to handle any stray germs he may have brought home.
I support you in being concerned.
If your family finds you ridiculous for being concerned, it might behoove you to leave. You can still love them, but why expose yourself to the distress of their disdain/ignorance? People get fixated on their own ideas and aren't always nice when our ideas differ and our needs inconvenience them.
Here is my suggestion:
If your family isn't keen on having you stay longer right now, you can safely return home but do sleep/stay in a different room and keep the windows open and wear a mask inside when you are near your husband. Use a separate bathroom if you can. Do not go back to business as usual until it is clear he is not infectious. Act as if you already have covid. It will only be a few days until it becomes clear whether or not he will get ill. And he can have a taste of what it is like with a sick person in the house, and why he might want to mask up to avoid living with that reality for several weeks in a row, plus having the added worry that ,once we get sick, the disease is not necessarily friendly to us.
I caught covid two weeks ago while traveling. It's a long process, recovering, paxlovid helps but you still have to be oh so careful and isolate for 3 weeks. Does your husband understand this? Does your family?
Thank you for your reply. I mask everywhere plane trips, shops etc. I had covid last year and received and monoclonal antibody. With that it only lasted 2 days with stuffy nose for 2 weeks. My fever soared on the 2nd day and then left...like everyone I just don't want to get it again. Thanks for your kind suggestions and support.
I understand your concerns. My husband recently tested positive 8/22 and two days later I also tested positive. I have been sick since 8/25 with an array of symptoms that seem to start to get better but then flair back up again. September 5th I was told I had Covid rebound. I have another doctor's appointment today because I'm still feeling pretty crappy. I'm hoping they do some blood work today. I'm glad that Paxlovid was available to me but wonder if I need something more to get me over the hump. Steroid shot on September 5th did absolutely nothing for symptoms. Everyone is affected differently by Covid. No one can tell you how you will be affected unfortunately. I tried everything to avoid exposure after husband tested positive to no avail. Worst part for me has been soar throat and horrendous cough!
Thank you for your reply. Sorry to hear that you are dealing with Covid and it's aftermath and hope you feel better soon. It seems like no one is masking and a lot of people are catching it. Our friends were at a wedding in August which turned out to be a super spreader. I just feel like the odd man out at times. Thanks again for your kind support.
It definitely does seem like that. Someone in this group recommended some really good masks. My husband doesn't like to wear them because he said it's hard to breathe. I ordered them and he says he's wearing them and claims they are much easier to breathe in for him. Let me know if you want the info for them. Your very welcome. Best of luck to you
Hi I would appreciate to have the information on the masks - thank you. An update to my first post - I went to stay at my folks before my husband came home yesterday. I was going to head home today but he tested positive for Covid this afternoon. I feel like I dogged one this time.
Best to you
They are 3M N95 9105 masks. I got the box of 50 had them overnighted. They make it much easier to breathe! Look them up on Google and you'll be able to see what they look like. Hope you like them!
Great! Thanks!
A kindred spirit! Thanks for sharing your experiences.
my husband also refused to mask anymore unless required. he got covid and didn't tell me he was sick he did get tested but he should have told me thne second he had a sore throat imho. he did not. i was furious. he reisisted masking but i told him he could either mask for 10 days (my doc;s instructions) camp in the backyard 100 degrees in the summer or go to a hotel. he reluctantly and incompletely masked. i wore my mask 24 - 7 except while takiung a meal in my bedroom as far from him as possible . our house is on the small side we do sleep separately anyway and doin't spend much time together so i managed to avoid getting sick or get covid as far as i know. i tested myself twice with the in home kits but never felt sick to get a pcr test. good luck!~ i would mask for 10 days and require him to do the same or go to a hotel for 10d days or the backyard!!
Sorry your husband was ill but pleased you managed to avoid it. I was lucky I decided to go to my parents before my husband came home testing positive for Covid the following morning.
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