Friday ramble: Good morning and happy Friday... - Care Community

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Friday ramble

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Good morning and happy Friday everyone, (as happy as you can make it, anyway).

I'm happy because I've got to the end of this week having survived a dreaded last Monday, as explained then.

Like most people I'm going to be ducking a second calendar event, I don't like, one which this year occurs on Sunday.... Valentines Day.

I think its original sentiment was sweet as a means of declaring a romantic interest in someone else, but don't like its commerce driven incarnation now, and this year I can steer well clear of all of that.

I'll continue to love my husband as I do on any other day, and I'm sending love to each and every one of you too, with good wishes for an eventual release from lockdown and happier days ahead.

I've had several phone calls from my sister this week (the one who had the awful accident and cares for her husband with dementia). I've come to realise that lots of her calls are because she has an underlying worry about something, but she's such a brave, strong and determined character that she won't say anything. I have to tease it out of her.

She's done incredibly well since her accident. In our conversation this week she told me that she's given up with the carers she was using to help her and is going it alone. I then discovered that one of her reasons is that her husband has begun to become quite aggressive and especially towards them, possibly because he has limited eyesight too and they startle him when he doesn't recognise who they are.

I think she'll be OK because mercifully her daughters (my nieces) are far more involved since her accident and will be close by to deal with any difficulties which arise in future, but it is a worrying sign.

In her dementia journey my late sister was quite aggressive too, brought on by her paranoia, but we found ways to lessen that because her disease went in a very different direction to my brother-in-law's.

Do any of you have any tips for my sister in dealing with aggression?

Hopefully all of you who are in UK and in the freezing grip of the current weather are staying warm and cosy in any way possible. I've put on a couple of radiators which haven't been used since I moved into this apartment 10 years ago. So it has to be cold out there. (I don't know, I'm not venturing that far).

I hope all of you enjoy your weekend as best you can, and...... see you on Monday, all being well.

Take care😊🌈

11 Replies
sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Hello Callendersgal, happy Friday to you too.

We’ve had a good week and our daughter and family moved into their new home yesterday. It all went smoothly. Strange to know they’ve gone but they will be very happy I’m sure. We did go over with washing I’d done so spent a short time with them and got to see the bungalow. It’s great. Our youngest grandson wanted to go home though but he’ll get used to it I’m sure. Lol.

I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day either and we don’t celebrate it. It’s all very commercial.

I think your sister is wonderful but could probably do with help. It’s nice to have your nieces involved but an experienced carer could be good too. See how things go. Aggression is upsetting and strength needed to handle it. A firm tone of voice perhaps but gentleness too. It’s not easy.

We’re nice and warm indoors and Sunday onwards is supposed to be milder.

Have a great weekend all.

Lots of loves and hugs. Xx😊💖😀💕

in reply tosassy59

Hi sassy59, I'm so glad your daughter's move went so well. Getting used to change is horrible though, especially when it involves your closest loved ones. But you've remained so supportive of the move and it's the only sensible thing. Our kids have to live their lives. I often wonder how my own mum felt when I married a soldier and we went off to live all over the world, and they saw so little of the children as they grew up. How sweet that your youngest grandson wanted to 'go home'. Bless him! Yes, once everything's back in place he'll soon feel better. It's true that 'home is where the heart is', and his is still really with his family in his heart!😊I think you are absolutely right about my sister! She and her husband have always been 'careful' with money and I'm sure the decision she's made has a lot to do with the expense of it. And she could be a little bit firmer with him, I'm sure. She has always been a 'people pleaser' and sees the best in everything and everyone. But once in a while there are situations you need to get a grip with, and I feel this is one of them! Oh well, I hope it all works out OK!

Glad you are keeping warm, and I'm hoping that Sunday will send the temperature up a bit! Have a great weekend! 👍🌈🔆😃

sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Thank you for your supportive reply Callendersgal, it means a lot. Our daughter is very caring and has always been there for us but we haven’t seen much of her recently because of lock down. I suppose it’s just getting used to the family not being 5 minutes walk away. It is what it is and we’re really very happy for them. They’re not far away thank goodness. We still have our son nearby with our beautiful granddaughter so that’s good plus our son who lives with us of course. 🤔 lol....joking.

I do hope things work out well for your sister and brother in law. I’m sure they will.

I’m sure the temperature will rise on Sunday one way or another. 🤭🤫😂

Take care xxx👍💖

FredaE profile image
FredaE in reply tosassy59

even in Cornwall where we have not had enough snow to make a life sized snow flea let alone anything bigger the wind has been really vicious. The sun is shining now and it looks wonderful. but do not trust him gentle maiden.

No I have no time for Valentines. The original idea was a secret message from a secret admirer.. not peppering the universe with red hearts. and expensive cards. Better a loving deed than prepackaged sentiment.

Getting sour in my old age

sassy59 profile image
sassy59 in reply toFredaE

I agree with you Freda. I’m getting sour in my old age too. Xxx

in reply toFredaE

Valentines for us will be a walk out and our usual Sunday dinner making do with what's in the cupboard.

We think the commercialism of it is silly as well!

in reply toFredaE

That makes us three old lemons with sassy59 joining in too FredaE 👍😊

Even though we are married we don't go for the silly commercialism on valentines day!

One Valentine's day my sister in law received a valentines card off Baby the cat as a trick!

Our Valentine's lunch will be carrot and parsnip soup followed by jacket potatoes and chicken curry making use of what's in the store cupboard.

FredaE profile image
FredaE in reply to

yum

in reply to

I do think it's quite funny to do something like send one from the cat! That made me smile! I hope you enjoy your store-cupboard meal on the day. It's really good to do that once in a while!

thara9643 profile image
thara9643

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