EOL Care for Mum Continued

[Daughter7250]

Hello, we finally got mum to have some bloods done at home and next thing we knew she was about to have a heart attack and ended up in A&E. Thankfully now and with lots of baby steps we’ve managed to keep her in hospital and she’s now being fast track released to do end of life at home. Consultant said she may have weeks or months. Amazing team at the hospital.

The most heart breaking thing is I don’t know if my mum is in denial or genuinely thinks she’s going home because she’s getting better. She’s started eating a little and drinking water again. She has been told but her personality and mood changes so it’s hard to gauge if she’s fully aware of the situation. She made a few escape attempts from the hospital but she’s so weak now I think she’s resigned to fact she actually does need some help.

I’m still scared about how her last moments will be and I don’t know how my dad is going to cope mentally with her at home but it’s what she wants and she always gave us everything we wanted, it’s time to return the favour, however hard that may be!

I didn’t realise how helpful but hard writing these posts would be! Sending love and thanks to all x

[redpoint72]

Hello daughter. I fully understand your mixed emotions, but remember it is what mum wants, that's the most important part.

I was my dads carer ,with him suffering with advanced parkinsons disease.....

It was such a hard thing to do in some ways,but I wouldn't have had it any otherway.

It really was a privilege to care for dad.....as you say the roles were reversed. You never think it will come to that but it does Unfortunately.

Unfortunately dad passed so quickly last year,in the end I didn't really get the chance to say what I wanted to.....

I don't really have many regrets, but that is one of them sadly.

Don't get upset about worrying about her last moments. Just being there is enough. Your mum will realise that.

But please say what you want to say to mum.

Although its positive that mum is eating a little, drinking.

Mum may well know what is going on,but won't show it for fear of upsetting yourself and dad,parents will always protect their children.

I'm sorry I've gone on to long.

I wish your mum well.

Don't forget yourself in this situation, its very easy to.

My best wishes. Chris

[Daughter7250 in reply to redpoint72]

Thanks so much for your message Chris. So sorry your dad is no longer with you, it’s so heartbreaking!

Mum has always expressed her wishes and I will carry them out and the family are all together on that.

It’s so hard to say goodbye isn’t it. I’m glad we have time with her to say all we need.

Best wishes to you too

[Dogbot]

Hi so sorry to hear your mum is ill , it’s hard to have relatives at home at the end both my mum and dad were so I know what you’re going through. Both the wife and I are sending our best thoughts 💕💕.

Good luck

Dogbot 🐶🌈

Stay safe All

[Daughter7250 in reply to Dogbot]

Thanks so much for your message, so sorry your parents have passed. It’s so hard to say goodbye. Thanks for your kind wishes, I really appreciate it! ❤️

[taar]

XX I know everyone is different, but from what I have experienced loved ones have just...slipped away. As others have said, if she is in denial-- or appears to be, surely there is no harm in that? XX

[Daughter7250 in reply to taar]

Yeah, we discussed that as a family. I’m happy to go along with the denial if that’s what she wants, thanks so much for your message. It’s just so hard saying goodbye! Xxx