I quit drinking last September and haven’t had even one sip since. I was very sick and could have died. I let it get that far. I was past the point of no return. Now I am still around the stuff all the time. I am in a liquor store buying wine once week because my boss has me buying him two boxes of wine. He started drinking heavily after he had been sick in the hospital for other reasons. I suppose he is depressed seeing his wife whom I take care of has had dementia for years now and can no longer communicate with him. I find it immensely embarrassing just being in the store. Kind of ironic when I once was buying alcohol for myself on a daily basis. The thought of life without alcohol scared the hell out of me. I was so utterly dependent on it. First thing I did before I stopped cold turkey was Drink. I’d drink when I awoke in the A.M.drank at work, drank when I came home, drank before bed. Drank if I got up to use the bathroom. I didn’t go anywhere without alcohol in my purse!! I used to hide it everywhere and anywhere! Looking back now….I was disgusting
Last night all of my siblings and family member including my mothers new boyfriend were gathered for Christmas Eve. They were making blended cocktails and fancy drinks, ones that if I did drink I would have loved 🥰. But , I Dont ❣️We played Janga and hung out around the table till Midnight. I didn’t know how I was going to feel about being around a bunch of slightly intoxicated people. Being on a different level I have found in the past to be a bit of a nuisance. I’m happy to say I HAD A BLAST! I drank alongside them. I sipped hot chocolate with whip cream and felt very much involved. Just comes to show me that I’m not missing out on any fun. I definitely didn’t miss the hangover this morning while we were opening presents. At one point I felt so incredibly blessed that for once in my long lived career of drinking I was able to stop and smell the roses and really appreciate my family. where as once before I couldn’t and wouldn’t have anything else on my mind then how I would be getting my next drink without anyone noticing. I was able to actually appreciate the moment. I was outside having a cigarette. Which is the next thing on my list. My New Years Reso is to quit… wish me luck🍀. So here I was all alone outside and I started tearing up. Not because I was sad. Those tears were tears of happiness because I knew in my heart that I had made it. And if I could quit alcohol and feel this way then it will be a no brainer quitting smoking. Because I am strong and I can do anything when I make up my mind to do so. So for any of those just starting out on a new chapter in their life, Just know. You are strong and you can do anything!! Good luck everyone and Merry Christmas 🎄❣️🎄❤️