Up again. Been missing in action

Up again. Been missing in action

I just spent 5 full days unable to go into sunlight. When I am truly fatigued and ill, I cannot bare light, just the shade of my room with curtains closed. I became so ill this time, I really wanted to die. Dying is not easy but I wanted it. I could not eat or drink much. I had to hold onto things along the route to my bathroom about 7 steps. I did not get mentally confused just deeply forlorn then deeply depressed. I managed to be driven about the island yesterday afternoon. Stopped here to make a rest spot on the picnic table. I am happier today even. But it will return, that gnarly fatigue. I slept almost entirely and certainly remained in bed all day then all night for 5 days and nights. They called off all treatments for me. There will be no transplant. This routine is now my new life. But I know I will cycle again. I just need a bit more rest. Aloha Catfishjumpin

16 Replies

  • Hey great to see you, you look so well considering keep your chin up thinking of you always....Maria x❤

  • Hey!. Keep up the dreams and will power and all the cycle rides will be yours. Unfortunately fatigue is with us all. As for the bike! I cheated and brought an electric one ( please don't tell my consultant ). You can get there . I just take several rest during the day... Take care.

  • Sending strength and wellness from New Zealand....;)

  • Aloha Catfishjumpin so glad to see you out in the sun, thinking about you xxx

  • Alpha Mis Daisey ✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

  • Love to you from the borders of England and Wales. xx No sun here today, just beautiful autumn colours and fallen apples! xx

  • Take care and continue to enjoy the delights of nature. Maybe feel some wind through your hair today courtesy of Angus the storm !

    Jim and Lucy

  • indomitable spirit! love the photograph. I've been wondering and thinking about you...hope you will go cycling in the sun very soon. sending you a good strong breeze for underneath your wheelsxxxxxxxx

  • Please do not leave. You're such a big motivation here for so many!xxxx

  • When your energy level permits, any contact with kindred spirits is nourishing, so tap away here on this site, the good vibrations will over throw the not so good. Please stay with us if you can kia kaha, (New Zealand Maori means stay strong) x Soooze

  • 💕💕💕

  • Maybe I can make this my mantra to recite before I sleep. The Maori are some of the strongest people on the planet. 🙏🙏🙏

  • Oh Catfish it truely pains me to see you as bad as you are. It must be amplified with you so fatigued, especially with you being such an energetic person. I wish I could inject you with a massive dose of energy which I know you must crave. I send you all my best wishes and waves of good thoughts and prayers that you can get back into that saddle. All my love and wishes Ianx

  • Not being able to cycle is truly breaking my heart. Thank you very very much for understanding. ❤️

  • Not been on the forum for a few days and just catching up on your posts. Your spirit is so strong and I love this picture with the wind blowing through your hair. I can feel this breeze. Keep strong as you always seem to be x😀

  • 👍🏻😉

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