Depression can hit everybody, not just those who are ill, I have faced it for various reasons in my life but for those of us with breathing problems it sort of sneaks up, pops up when we do not even feel that bad or poorly, the mind plays tricks on itself to, just when you think you are feeling great the mind gets a notion that it ain't going to last, then the spiral of depression starts, before long you are down in the dumps again, short and bad tempered and feeling like it's all over, what's the point I can not win, I can never be fit again.
Well it's a myth, it's in your head, they explain it by telling you that there is chemical unbalance and they dole out pills. I have taken various versions of anti-depressants and for long periods, in the end I binned the lot, I decided to fight.
If you have already read it, then you will know what I mean, the mind causes the depression, chemical or not, and the best way to beat it is to change your mind set !!!!!! Hard, no not really, it's a question of taking a step back and looking hard at what is wrong, then concentrating on ways to fix them. Nothing will happen over night, it takes more than a few days to get there but you have to !!
Those little goals you set your self each day, ( I mean little ) will build up, they will encourage you to try more, never stretch yourself to far, aim small then feel big when you get there. You will face setbacks, black days and nights when your mind tells you that it's all a waste of time, but it isn't !!
One the most important things we all need to learn how to do is control our minds and use the good side of it to tell the bad side of it to butt out, your a fighter, you will NEVER give in to depression, it makes everything else seem un-surmountable, beat the depression, then look to kicking the backside out of the other things.
It worked for me, it still is working, no pills, no therapists, just a lot of learning about mind over mind before mind over body, it's a real power in itself.
SSBD Peter.
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PeterK1
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The mind is a very powerful thing good and bad. I too have suffered depression started with post natel depression over 26 yrs ago and on and off since due to one thing and another. It is a very brave person Peter who can discuss in open as many people are unaware of how much it impacts upon day to day life . I do think modern life plays a huge part in mental well being due to stress and pressures illness as you say does not help. Take care x
You are absolutely right Peter. I have just put up a post regarding my Mum who was in tears tonight and who was given anti depressants last week. She doesn't want to speak, she doesn't want to do anything and her heart races when she thinks someone is coming to the door. I think you advice on setting yourself small goals each day is a great idea and I will be encouraging her to do this. Thank you for your post.
I only pass on my own personal life experiences in the hope that it will help, it's not gospel and I am not trying to preach nor am I saying to anybody that they should ignore their doctor, consultants and specialist.
What I am trying to get across here is that no matter how deep we think that black hole is, and no matter how hard it is to see that tiny spark in there, we have to look, look really hard sometimes but if you do look you will see that in all that darkness there is an occasional little thing that just might put the smallest of smiles back in to your life, smiling inside or outside, it's a start, what ever it was that made that happen, you take it, you build on it, you relight a small fire from that spark then you do your utmost to keep that fire going and make it in to a positive instead of a negative.
Bad days and nights, loneliness, not being able to achieve the same goals we had before all drag us down back in to the misery of depression, the secret for me is that I learnt from experience to get angry, not at the doctors, nurses, carers and family but really angry at myself, angry for letting myself sink so low, angry at my self for not realising just how much people care, even angrier at myself when I also realised just how much pain I was causing to those around me !! I used that anger,( I still do ), I direct it and channel it to do good. Good for those around me because they see a positive fighting back me, good for me because the fight back although hard is very rewarding to and helps me see that things can improve, you can improve them yourself but you have to try and keep trying, never give up altogether.
Take care and I hope things do get better for both of you soon.
SSBD Peter ( Stay Strong and Breath Deep)
Peter.
Peter I agree up to a point in what you say. But you have to be at a milder depressive level to even be able to think about what's wrong. if your depression is severe you can't even remember your own name let alone think about mind control. Everything is blank and black. Anti-depressants have a role to play in helping to reduce the depression to more manageable levels where it is possible for your mind to take control. I don't believe mind control alone can cure depression though I am not denying it has a part to play.
Morning coughalot1, I understand what you are saying and I have been there. As I said various versions of anti-depressants and I do not say they did not help, in fact at some of my lowest points they are probably why I am still here.
What I am trying to get across to people is that I did learn to see it coming, and how to stop it taking me so low that I couldn't help myself. I learnt to stop it and beat it without the tablets or therapists.
It did take time and it was a long learning curve and various knocks through life to get me to the point I am a now but I hope I am showing that it can be achieved, the day will come when you can live and be happy again, have a life without being dependant on the pills.
The road through my life with depression did not just start back in 1990 with my accident ! It started long before I fell from a ladder as a shepherd. I became a shepherd to get away, to be solitary and only have my own problems to deal with. When I was a younger man I married young, 18 in fact and at 19 years old my son was born, he was beautiful. I was in seventh heaven and over the moon, the happiest young bloke you would ever meet. It did not last, six and half weeks to be honest. That's the age of my son when he died from cot death syndrome. Next came the affair an the divorce, my ex-wife blamed me and an affair was how she coped.
Life moved on, I met another wonderful woman who had two daughters from her previous marriage, just over three years old and 4 months.Life seemed to be helping me get back up there on my feet, it did but only so it could kick me in the teeth again, at nine months and one week old cot death syndrome struck again, Catherine the youngest daughter and it just devastated me. In time we helped each other through, we got married and had two children of our own, I said three beautiful daughters in my little life story because there is no difference to me, my step-daughter is as much my daughter as the biological two are.
We wanted a life for us all that was better, no housing estates full of unemployed, we wanted to be free of society, independent in a way with a less stressful and cleaner life so I went from being a miner to being a shepherd. ( another long boring story getting there ).
So life got better again, all five us had a clean healthy life, we had everything we wanted, well more money would have been nice but agricultural wages never have been fantastic.
I hope coughalot1 that you can see from this that my life has some hard knocks along the way, and I speak from my own personal life experiences, not medically trained, certainly not claiming to be an expert either. I'm only trying to show people by sharing what has happened to me that you can bounce back, you can keep going and life is no bed of roses all the way, roses are full of thorns and they will stab you no matter how careful you are. It's a very very lucky person who can claim that they have gone through life with zero hardships of one way or another !
Now it's COPD, just another thing to fight, but I will fight, life has taught me that you have to.
There is help out there, you can choose which way to go, learn to build yourself up to be strong or stay where you are and rely on that help. My choice is my choice, that's not saying it's right for everybody !
I'm going now, writing all this is bringing back to many memories and they are pulling me down.
I have offered what i hope is good advice but that's up to you as an individual to decide !!!
Before I go away and hide again, I would just like to add, I did fall very low at times in my life, I did even become an alcoholic for a time ( another hard thing to beat but I did beat it, don't drink more than 2 pints of lager in a month these days )
And on a final note as a goodbye I would like to share a song with you all. Turn up the volume, stuff the neighbours, listen to the lyrics even if you do not like the band. hugs, love and lots of kisses to all of you and thanks for being there !!!
Peter.
Now play the song please:- (copy & paste the link in to your search bar if it doesn't work) youtube.com/watch?v=rYGLrJh...
hi peter, whilst i agree whole heartedly, with fight, fight and fight even more,,, but sorry to have to beg to differ on a few points you have made, firstly you say "i did even become an alcoholic for a time",,,, peter,,,once your an alcoholic ,your always an alcoholic, even although you "drink two pints of lager in a month",, if you were an alcoholic,, that would spell big danger,,,, eventually,,,,,believe me, i know, i "was that soldier" never having a drink for 14 years now,i dare not even take one drink. nothing against it,, but its just not for me,,
secondly depression comes in varying forms, i think coughalot explains this better than me, sometimes this type of depression needs medical intervention, especially when its clinical depression.
as far as hard knocks in life are concerned, im sure there are very many on here who could list plenty of very hard knocks, but i do admire your positive attitude, i dont wish to be impolite peter and agree with many things you say,, if it works for you then good,, but for others i would say,, be happy,,,,but be careful.,,,jimmy
Hi peter, you are a very strong positive person,you are very fortunate,I agree with you re your mind set,that it is case of the way we look at things,I think you can go so far down in life,then the only way is up,little steps mind,as jimmy said we all have a story to tell,it's how we deal with it that makes us who we are,I wish you all the best,xx
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