Can anyone give me some advice I have had copd for several years but I know it is impacting on my 38 year marriage as when it comes to sex

I lose my breath and have to stop this has made me feel inadequate and now I am scared to try. I have spoke about it with my wife but she feels as though I don't even try.

this is worrying me more and that makes me feel even worse

9 Replies

  • Hi angling

    Must be very upsetting and no help to your relationship

    Call the blf help line... they will have some advice for both you and your wife ...... there are I am sure 'ways and means' ..... can't remember no so will get back to you


  • helpline no is 03000 030 555.... you can ask them anything, about anything

    help is there ... choose to use it ... all the best ..... Beth

  • Hi Angling

    I will be as blunt as I can without being crude, Put three straws in her mouth, tell her she can only breathe through the straws. Then put her on top. After two minutes tell her that is exactly how you feel but unfortunately you can't take straws out of your mouth to get your breath back. It will perhaps bring it home to her what we go through.

    Best wishes my friend from a fellow sufferer.


  • Hi,,Don't worry being breathless is a bugger I know,,but can be got around..Different positions can make breathing less of a struggle,try on your side from behind,for one example..TAKE your time,,its not a race,,Viagra can be a great help if req,, Also if your partner takes a more active role that will help..BEST OF LUCK..

  • Well! I think I would go along with raptor on this one, get your lady to do all the work while you lie back and enjoy! sometimes we just can't please other people all the time, please don't feel bad, a cuddle can be very satisfying too!wishing you well,huff xxxx

  • BLF page :

    Hope things work satisfactorily for both of you :)

  • Hi... there are lots of ways to please your lady without you getting out of breath ... could be an exciting time finding out ? xxx

  • I wish!


    Your daily tonic

  • Think in a creative way, you might surprise both of you, as already been said, there are many ways to give and receive pleasure, give relate a call, they have a really good sex therapy service and are very used to these sort of struggles, try not to worry too much, nothing puts a damperner on loving like worry x x x

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