Sudden death

[Bishop1]

Any advice for me to try and move onWonderful supportive children and grandchildren

I miss him so much

Thanks for listening

[bridgeit]

Hello Bishop.

May I offer my condolences for your loss. This is a painful time for you. This is normal and it's a hard road that must be travelled. Every step should get easier as time passes, but it's not easy for anyone in the throes of recent loss to accept this at first.

I am not a counsellor or medical, but I have felt loss.

The devastation will pass and you will begin to rebuild your life, but some good counselling from those best positioned to guide you might help. I have included in this post a reference to the BHF site and it's advice about bereavement. It holds references that you might like to investigate when you're feeling ready to do so.

bhf.org.uk/informationsuppo...

Meanwhile, allow yourself to feel your grief and loss. Take time and concentrate on every activity you do. This is being 'mindful'. Try to avoid auto-pilot. Think about everything you're doing as you're doing it, then move on to the next thing when you're ready. Even simple things like washing-up and making the bed. Don't try to fill your day with activity. Rest too. When grief overwhelms you, let it do so. This is not wallowing, it's natural and must be fully processed in order to get past it.

Consider some hobbies; perhaps things that you've never gotten round to investigating - anything from rambling to painting to learning how to play the piano or cards! Park your ideas for later exploration.

Keep a journal of day to day experiences and feelings. Write it down on paper/pad, don't type using a keyboard. The stimulus of writing by hand with a proper pen is important when journaling.

Time will heal pain, but it does take time. As the old saying goes: this too shall pass. It's true; it does.

Always be kind to yourself and go gently.

[Bishop1 in reply to bridgeit]

Thanks. Xxx

[meadfoot]

So sorry you have lost your dear husband. Such a shock for you and your family. The timeframe is so short little wonder you are in a state. Surprised you can even think let alone begin to cope. Be kind to yourself its extremely early days and as we all know grief takes some twists and turns along the way.

Try to eat and drink and do basic things, anything else can wait. Your mental and physical health is paramount to sustain you through this long and difficult journey. Dont expect too much of yourself, grief is a hard taskmaster. Go with it and take each second as it comes. Grief counselling may help at some point. Best wishes.

[Bishop1]

Thanks

[cappachina]

The suddenness of his death means you are in total shock. You will come to terns with this and may find comfort in the way he went having had a wonderful time rather than suffering a long illness as my husband did .You may feel very angry at him for daring to leave you then guilty bevpcause you know he had no choice. All this is normal of course you are struggling Give in to the bad days and grieve.Try to think of one thing that has brightened your day from watching a bird to speaking to your family and friends Talk about the good times you have had with him hear their favourite memories it all helps You will move on holding the love for him in your heart abd you will make new happy memories for yourself as he would want you to do .I am so sorry for your loss Your future life will be different but can still be good but it takes time