Chlamydia- has my husband cheated? : Hi I found out... - BASHH

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Chlamydia- has my husband cheated?

Sarah765
Sarah765

Hi I found out through a routine visit to the gp I have chlamydia. I didn’t really have any symptoms- some mid cycle bleeding but I put it down to stress. To be sure I got myself and my husband tested again and it came back positive for both of us. He doesn’t have any symptoms.

I did an sti check last year 6 months into our marriage and obviously 6plus months into us being sexually active and it came back negative.

My question is this:

Has he cheated on me in the space of the last year? He’s insisting that he hasn’t but I can’t seem to make sense of this otherwise

4 Replies
oldestnewest

As a married couple , your chance of having chlamydia is very low to begin with. I don't know your age which is also a factor. There are small false positive and false negative rates for the chlamydia test. The test was done because you have unscheduled bleeding. The difficulty now is with a positive result you are obliged to treat. If you are concerned , you could of course repeat the test prior to treatment and see if positive or negative. A second positive result would be very unlikely to be a false positive result . But even if the second test was negative, its still worth treatment, because of the chance of adverse outcomes if a true result.

Sarah765
Sarah765 in reply to Galen70

After getting my initial positive from gp I went and got another test done at clinic with husband before starting treatment and we both tested positive.

We are in our mid 30s.

Given that I tested negative a year ago having been with him ,obv not been with anyone else since and now I’ve tested positive with mild symptoms and he’s got no symptoms but positive what are the chances that of infidelity? I know all medical evidence is pointing towards him being unfaithful but I would just want to know if there is another possible reason before I make a decision about our marriage.

Galen70
Galen70 in reply to Sarah765

This is difficult. The chance of a second false positive is very low, and if he tested positive also , then that would have to be a third false positive result , again making these results extremely unlikely to be false positives.

What you may need to consider is that your test six months into being sexually active with him could have been a false negative. Did he test at the same time as you ? If he hadn't tested in this relationship, until you had a positive test , then it is possible he could have had the infection and at the six months mark, by sheer good luck , it had not been passed.

Ultimately it comes down to a question of trust, rather than the tests. If this has really been difficult for you , consider relationship counseling . This marriage is early days , and if everything else has been good , perhaps you need to draw a line over this issue and move forward, potentially with counseling support.

If you’re not ready to give up on the marriage, don’t. If he was unfaithful, as it seems is a possibility, is it likely that he would still insist to you that he wasn’t?

Were you together a long time before marriage?

Maybe find out if he views marriage and long term relationship as having different rules with regards to cheating.

Good luck.

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