Another day

Well been busy most of the morning carrying on from last night clearing the house , got to go to the cemetery to pay the grave diggers . Been bagging clothes up when a song came on my MP3 player I didn't know I had and I must have replayed the track about ten times it reflected just how I have been feeling for some time so I found the lyrics online . It may be morbid .

[Damon1864 Volunteer]

Hi Dave it must be terrible for you, I think that song is quite appropriate in some ways thank you for sharing it with us. Where in Greece are you, sorry for asking but I love the country. Have a good day and take care 😊 Bernadette and Jack 🐕 xxxxxx 🌻🌻

[Hidden in reply to Damon1864]

Rhodes . Going to have a chat with the father today after I've dealt with the grave diggers . He's asked for a sit down chat about emotions and stuff but yet again this is Greek culture

[Stratos20 in reply to Hidden]

Accept any help you can get Davey.

[Hidden in reply to Stratos20]

I will

[sassy59]

Lots of things to do to keep you busy but lots of thinking time too. Another song found it’s way inside your head, sad but a reflection of how you’re feeling. Who’s it by? Play something cheerful Dave. Music gets me through lots of difficult times, it’s my go to tonic.

Take care xxx.

[Hidden in reply to sassy59]

I have around three thousand songs on my MP3 player 😂 a real mixture lots of music from the 70s 80s some 50s lots of relaxation type music even classical music. Music played a huge part in my life.

[sassy59 in reply to Hidden]

👍🤗💜

[Kristicats]

I’m hoping you can find a buddy to share some happier times with? Dave

[Hidden in reply to Kristicats]

Not going to happen 😃 I keep myself away from folks .

[SORRELHIPPO]

I have done that house clearance twice now, never gets any easier, hated throwing away other peoples memories. I know I worked on autopilot until after the funeral was over, Then I found I could think. Take care of your mind, all the best.

[Hidden in reply to SORRELHIPPO]

I know you are right done it once before but this time I'm dealing with both my mum's stuff and stepfather's. But my stepfather landlord just want the house cleared

[SORRELHIPPO in reply to Hidden]

Some people are just inhumane.

[Hidden in reply to SORRELHIPPO]

Yes I agree but he said the house was for my mother and stepfather now both gone he wants to renovate and re-let totally heartless and controlled by money

[B0xermad]

Hi davey you are right it is a morbid song ,I would delete it if it was me.please have that chat with the father and get those feelings out as it may help you vent .it must be horrible for you carrying all those thoughts and you have a life to live as you are still young enough to enjoy your views and surrounding yourself with positivity and people. Look after you x

[Hidden in reply to B0xermad]

Problem is my condition is terminal and expectancy is not a long one , all I wanted was to feel wanted someone to love and feel it returned but it was not meant to be . I'm alone isolated with beauty around me but no-one to share with . 😞

[B0xermad in reply to Hidden]

Oh davey such a situation to be in ,on here we can be available for a chat anytime for you but it doesn't remedy the issue of being with a friend who can share your day to day in person I really hope you find that x

[Hidden in reply to B0xermad]

I can't see it happening to be honest. Had one true love and lost it. Can't and won't try to replace that person . I take each day as it comes. 👍🏼😃

[B0xermad in reply to Hidden]

Good for you davey👍❤️

[Walkwalkwalk]

Davey, This is such a difficult time for you. I hope that you can explain all of these feelings to the father. He may know of someone in the community who can help yet still keep you safe.

You say that your condition is terminal and if I remember correctly, your doctor speaks English. Perhaps you, the father and she could work together and have a plan for your care.

I do hope so and meanwhile my best wishes for Monday and the house clearing.

Grace

[Hidden in reply to Walkwalkwalk]

All the father did was talk about God heaven and how my stepfather is in a better place . And his English was very little broken English. Regards to care I get nine unless I pay 700 euros a month for it 😂😂😂

[Walkwalkwalk in reply to Hidden]

It may be too early for you to do more than deal with your grief and I agree with Izb1 to avoid negative thoughts as much as possible. I know that is not easy for you and that you have a lot to contend with.

Look out your more relaxing music for that Jack Daniels time under your stars. Or even some dance music as it sounds like you have a wide selection on your MP3..

My very best wishes.

Grace

[Hidden in reply to Walkwalkwalk]

My music collection covers a multitude of music but mainly 80s happier times. 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼

[Walkwalkwalk in reply to Hidden]

That’s so good to hear. We all need to remember those happy times and listening may help you feel better. Best wishes

Grace

[Hidden in reply to Walkwalkwalk]

👍🏼

[Izb1]

Please dont dwell on this song Dave, negativity isnt good for your mental health. Nobody in life escapes hard times and at the moment you need to grieve, deal with these thoughts later when perhaps you can look at life in a different light and hopefully bring a bit of joy to your day x

[Hidden in reply to Izb1]

Can barely focus on getting my shoes on and off at the moment 😂

[Izb1 in reply to Hidden]

I know but that will pass x

[Hidden in reply to Izb1]

I know , it's very inconvenient though 😂

[watergazer]

Take care. Try to look on positives to help you through this sad time. 🤗

[Hidden in reply to watergazer]

Just got to find some positive 😂👍🏼 have not seen any positives since before Christmas just gone . 😃

[JJ_7]

Hi Daveyboy1963. I know that dark place you are in. It did pass for me and life took on more meaning. Sometimes just getting up and getting your shoes on is a success. Please look to the small things....perhaps your beautiful surroundings? Wishing you happier days and thinking of you. x

[Hidden in reply to JJ_7]

I know what you mean , it's just hard to focus a lot of the time. But I will deal with it

[JJ_7 in reply to Hidden]

Yes it is hard to focus at these times. Oppressive thoughts just cover you in a dark blanket and it seems there is no way out. But there is a way forward and hope you take that hard road. Have you considered requesting a short treatment of anti depressants.....it can take the edge off. Good luck daveyboy x

[Hidden in reply to JJ_7]

I've been on anti depressants for a while now , and I weaned myself off them they didn't do anything . I was in a dark place first time I was on here , I originally came here to pay my respects to my mum and got stranded long ass complicated issue , but something changed and drew me out the dark but unfortunately the dark place I'm back in is a damn site darker and recent changes in my health for the worst have got to the point of I'm tired and had enough of fighting. But I keep ticking.

[Firefly25]

Davey - one thing I've noticed from your posts is that you have a talent for noticing the beauty all around you, being in the moment and appreciating moments of peace. That's a great gift that not everyone has. I hope it will help you to get through the difficulty of the next few weeks. Taking things day by day, minute by minute as you allow yourself to grieve. Take care x

[Hidden in reply to Firefly25]

My gran always told me if you open your eyes and stop shut everything out you will see beauty all around you open your senses and use them , living with my gran was like living with a sage 😂😂 thing is she was right . I just have to want to move forward when all I want to do is give in , the problem is I have literally given up on everything . My health is the main reason but also some personal stuff .

[Firefly25]

Your gran was right! Keep noticing the beauty and you will gradually find that strength to move forwards. It takes time though, but it does happen. Sending positive thoughts and strength. x

[Hidden in reply to Firefly25]

Thank you ☺️

[Hidden in reply to Firefly25]

I know what I really need but I don't think I'm going to get there. And it's something I found after a lifetime of looking but lost . Something that only comes along once in a lifetime. And that's me being honest and realistic.x

[Patk1 in reply to Hidden]

💕x

[dunnellon]

I'm so sorry you're facing such a dark time. There's nothing magical to pull you out of it but as Firefly said, you have a knack for appreciating the beauty of your surroundings I don't know if you still have that cafe nearby, but I remember you being happy to be there and the photos you post on this site are much appreciated. As for depressing songs - pitch them to the trash! Music can really influence a mood. Play Van Halen's 'Jump' instead!😊 Thinking of you and sending peaceful, supportive vibes.

[Hidden in reply to dunnellon]

Believe it or not but I do have some soft rock on my MP3 player I just play it from the start through my blue tooth speaker system and the songs are random. Don't go down to the cafe I go to one close by and very early in morning.

[dunnellon]

Three thousand songs is very impressive Davey! I'm a hard and soft rock fan, 70's, 80's & 90's. Blast in the car alone, softly at home with hubs! Good to hear you have variety. There are some songs from the past that resurrect bad karma and I don't listen to them. There's a lot we can't control, but we can control our music preferences. Rock on!

[Hidden in reply to dunnellon]

🤘🤘

[dunnellon]

👍😀

[Hidden in reply to dunnellon]

People seem to forget music soothes the soul on a personal note I really do like Michael Bolton and alot of American gospel music

[dunnellon]

I like a lot of the folksy music too like Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young 'Our House' and some old Peter, Paul & Mary still rings a bell. Paul Butterfield Blues Band and Vanilla Fudge - now THAT dates me! Not an opera fan and Rap (music?) irritates the hell out of me. No wonder young people listening to that stuff are so cranky and hot tempered and disconnected. They need more Michael Bolton!

[Hidden in reply to dunnellon]

I hate rap with a passion . Give me time love and tenderness all day long 😂😂 must say though I do love UB40 Jimmy Hendrix and for quiet time Mike Oldfield and enigma

[dunnellon]

Not familiar with Oldfield and Enigma - I'll need to look them up. Always happy to look into something different. Thanks for the direction!

[Hidden in reply to dunnellon]

Can't believe not heard of Mike Oldfield tubular bells 😂 enigma are brilliant to chill out to .

[Patk1]

Davey, will u still have yr home? I do hope so x

[Alice70]

Please Davey don't listen to that song ,you sound so down ,go and see your doctor tell her or him how you are feeling ,she can give your something to help ,please don't suffer when there is medical help there,I've edited my post as I've just read you have been on antidepressants before ,and didn't do much good ,well Davey ,there are lots of different antidepressants, maybe your doctor will give you a different type ,tell her the others didn't do much good

[Aingeful]

Music often gets me through bad times too.I come from an Irish background and am a massive fan of the Dubliners. This song speaks to me when I feel sad. youtu.be/niKazIh4tCc(Not working as expected?)