No Surrender

[Phil40]

I apologise to all for my absence here of late and also apologise that my post is sadly to report my Mum passing away last Thursday.

The Coroner had to conduct a post-mortem because although she had seen every other health professional, Mum had not actually seen one of that increasingly rare species (maybe Attenborough should do a program about them) a GP or doctor face to face for a few months. She was supposed to have seen her GP last Tuesday, but she let her fingers do the walking and phoned instead.

In fact I received a strange phone call from the GP last Friday sounding a bit anxious I feel, about Mum passing away. After she hadn’t bothered crossing the road to visit her in person may lead to questions I thought (the surgery is literally over the road from where Mum lived).

Anyway, I received a call from the Coroner yesterday who has said Mum died of Broncho pneumonia, acute purulent bronchitis and atherosclerosis and they are releasing Mum to me.

I am sorry to not have posted anything for ages and now return to report this but I know I always wonder what has happened to members when they disappear.

And more than that I want to say, what I want to be remembered is that everyone should actually take the positives from how long my frail, terribly ill Mum managed to keep on going with a positive attitude and trying so hard to adjust to her ever deteriorating health. I thought she was going to be lucky to live a few months when I persuaded her to move near me so I could care for her and that turned into FIVE years. She was very very ill for a very long time.

So please don’t let this spoil your day but take solace that she suffers no more and has had a wonderful few years she wouldn’t have had without everyone’s help and support.

Which includes this forum which has always been a friend and help with the wealth of information and knowledge and friendship and support, especially in the wee small hours when times were really hard.

So thank you everyone from me and my Mum and thanks for helping us through this struggle.

I hope, should I have to live with anything like COPD like Mum, I can be as strong and tenacious and remember: ‘No Surrender’.

[sassy59]

Don’t apologise for being absent Phil, you were caring for your dear mum. Sorry to hear of your sad loss but as you say mum is now at peace and no longer suffering,

Sad to think her doctor couldn’t cross the road to see her but I dare say she had her reasons.

Please take good care of yourself and know that you did all you could for mum.

Condolences to you. Xxxx

[TG58 in reply to sassy59]

Sorry to hear your sad news Phil, it's a terrible day when it happens, I remember when I lost my mum, the worst day of my life, but I cherish the times we had together and what a lovely woman she was, and I'm sure in time you will be able to do the same, particularly as you said those last 5 years you mentioned, time is a great healer, but it will also give you the lovely memories you had with your mum from childhood to adulthood, my sincere condolences to you and your family, take care and remember one day at a time 🙂

[skischool]

Condolences on the loss of your mum Phil,i know what it is like to be a carer for a loved one and i also know you will question your own actions and others in relation to their passing but belive me it is better in the long term to put that behind you,remember them with warmth and affection and just take one day at a time.

Best wishes Ski's and Scruff's

[Hacienda]

Thank you for sharing your heartfelt feelings, So Sorry at this sad time. She had a Good five years with you, being with her Son would have inspired her to do well, which she did.

I truly feel that Some GP's need to retrain for People Skills.

My Condolences to you Phil & Your Family. C. XXX

[Damon1864 Volunteer]

Please don't apologise your mum had to come first. I'm so sorry to hear about her passing but as you say she no longer has to suffer bad health. She certainly sounded like an amazing lady, and from what you have written you sound the same. Hold on to your wonderful memories and may your mum rest in peace. You try to have a good day and stay safe, and please remember we are all here for you. 😊 Bernadette xx xx 🌈

[peege]

Bless you for coming back to tell us and I'm so sorry about you mum. She must have been a lovely lady. Very best wishes to you and yours. Peege

[cofdrop-UK]

So very sorry Phil to hear of the passing of your dear Mum. Very sad and especially so in the difficult times we have at present. Having to have post mortems and inquests make a difficult sad situation even worse. We had this twice even though they were in hospital, on was my Mum. So I thank you so much for letting us know as it must have taken a lot of doing.

Please know Phil we are here for you. Heartfelt condolences to you and your family. Your Mum must have been very special to have such a caring son.

With love

Cx

[Pentreath Volunteer]

Very sorry to hear this news Phil. You are being very philosophical and I hope that will continue to help you. Your mother was blessed to have you so close for those last years of her life.

[watergazer]

Sorry to hear of your mum passing away. You looked after her well. Take good care of yourself and no need for apologies X Anita

[judes]

Sending love and hugs at this difficult time your mum will be at peace now. There is no need to apologise family comes first.

Love and hugs

J

[Rattle]

Sorry to hear about the sad loss of your mum. I hope knowing that she is no longer suffering and that you were able to spend the last years of her life caring for her and helping her to stay safe and as well as possible will be of some consolation in it all.

Take care

[Patsy164]

So sorry to hear about your Mum Phil such sad news. My condolences. I think the thought that she is suffering no more is a relief and you had some good years with her.

Even if you haven’t got a chest problem pop back in and let us know how your doing. X

[Caspiana]

Hi Phil,

I am very sorry to hear about your mum. You are a good son and I know she had the best care possible from you. She must be so proud of you. May you remember the love more than the loss and may she rest in peace.

Sending best wishes,

Cas xx 🌹

[knitter]

Sending condolences and thanks for your inspirational , thoughtful words .

[Dedalus]

Sounds as though she was such a great character - strong, wonderful lady, may she rest in peace. My sincerest condolences; she'll be sorely missed.

[Catnip]

Blessings, Phil. May your mum rest in peace.

Catnip

[HungryHufflepuff]

I'm very sorry for your loss.

[ninelives]

Thinking of you at this time.

[Ergendl]

What a sad time for you Phil40. Thanks for coming back to explain what has happened. May your dear Mother rest in peace. Her moving nearer to you may have given you both five more years together than she would otherwise have had.

[Izb1]

So sorry to hear of your loss Phil, my condolences to you. Thank you for coming back to let us know at such a hard time for you. You will get through this and as they say time is a great healer, which is very true. My mum was a great fighter and managed with such strength fighting a number of illness's. Your fond memories will see you through x