Hello, Not sure this is the right place to post this, but I spotted other posts questioning Asbestos and have no where else to turn to. Long story short, I am 37, bought this 1960's home with my wife and have been renovating it for the past 5 years. I have done eveythign myself, from chisilling walls to sanding old paint and plaster, and drilling walls, including removing old vinyl tiles that I have now since disocvered coudl be asbestos!
How was I so silly. I did not realise the dangers of an old home and what lurks behind. So I cant sleep now, and been like this for a week. I wake up thinking, oh, I drilled that wall in this room, and never wore a mask. The only time I wore a mask was when sanding the walls to smooth out plaster.
From what I gather plaster walls do not contain asbestos, (I hope) as there was a lot of dust and rubble that my wife and I cleaned up, and cant remeber if wore a mask at this time! ahhhh.
I feel so silly, also guilty for potentially putting my wife and children at risk. THey were not in the house when I did any DIY tasks, but they did come in from time to time to look around, but thankfully not when there was dust in the air.
I have called the doctor, for two reasons, to explain teh asbestos exposure, and also the anxiety. She said it would be short exposure, but I worry, I did not remember to tell her everythign at the time, as its all starting to come back to me. So 5 years of drilling and sanding, and to top it off a few years ago, I had some recycled hardcore delivered, (recyclyed smashed up rubble in small pieces) to form a base fo rthe driveway. I worry some of the material could have contained asbestos from old smashed buildings. I didnt wear a mask! and i recall dust in the air at the time when I was using a machine to smooth it out.
I am so so worried, its keeping me up all night. Worried I have sent myself to an early grave. Thanks for listening.
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Danieluk37
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You poor thing Daniel, you sound as if you’re at your wits’ end.
A few things occur to me. Firstly, asbestosis is a very rare condition and, as your GP says, you’d need to be exposed to it for quite long periods. You sound more like a weekend diyer.
Another point is, a 1960s house doesn’t count as “old”. Many of us here, including me, were brought up in houses from that era, with loads of diy going on around us, but very very few people ever have problems caused by asbestos. So try to get this in perspective.
Show me a workman who wears a mask! I’ve had builders in so many times & despite my nagging them, they never do. Including plasterers. So, that’s you & every other tradesman & diy-er, yet how often do you hear of asbestosis?
Health & safety regs around asbestos are relatively recent - well, 20yrs or so? Until then, people were really blasé about working with it, although of course once it was found to be a factor in certain lung conditions, strict precautions were brought in. But I believe it’s still incredibly rare, yet think of the millions of people who worked with it, or lived in houses containing it, before that time.
Why don’t you give the BLF helpline a call and talk over your worries? They’re really helpful. The no. is 03000 030 555, Mon-Fri 9-5.
I think this covid thing is getting to us all. I’ve been getting morbid thoughts too, you’re not the only one. Don’t just lie awake worrying, talk to your wife, and then phone the helpline. Or talk to us, anytime. And get some help with the anxiety. Your GP might suggest anti-depressants as they can really help you “see the wood for the trees”. I hope you have a better night.
Hello Hanne62. Thank you so much for the reply. It really has helped me reading above. Reading it does make me think more rationally about. I seem to focus on the doom and gloom that Dr google seems to always seems to divert me to.
I keep reading conflicting information, such as one fibre can kill etc , but then it takes extended exposure to be at risk, which i personally think would be more the case like you said, as many many people have completed diy tasks like myself (not a builder. - weekend DIYer like you said)
Okay. Thinking more straight now. I have purchased some nytol tablets in the hope I get sleep. I worry it affecting my home life at present and I am not giving my family the love and time they deserve as I am obsessing over the “what if” and then the guilt of why was I so stupid, and not educate myself about the dangers, and now will my children not see their dad during their teenage and early adulthood lives.
I will call that’s number. Thank you. I have no one else to talk to. I now don’t burden my wife with this topic as she is fed up hearing about it, but I understand her point of view as I have not stopped for almost a week now. It’s affecting my work too.
Thank you once again for listening and replying. It really helped. Daniel
You’re more than welcome. I do understand how your wife feels. My husband’s had acute episodes of anxiety too, as indeed have I.
You absolutely mustn’t google tho. Stay away from all websites except really reputable ones. Only listen to people who know what they’re talking about eg your GP. The trouble with anxiety is, it feeds itself. Someone can be explaining to you why your worries are baseless, but you’re so obsessed you just think “yes, but what if...?
Thing is, you don’t even know for sure those tiles contained asbestos. Or the hardcore. And presumably your work with the hardcore was mostly outside?
A very wise woman once pointed out to me that we could spend our whole lives worrying about something which never happens. Then, when we’re really old & look back, we realise how many happy times we spoiled with needless worry. It’s human nature, but you can see what a total waste of time it is.
One tip someone gave me was to write my main concerns (and the reason why they shouldn’t be worrying me) on postcards. One worry, and the rational answer to it, per card. Keep them safe where you can look at them whenever you feel that panicky feeling coming on. Remind yourself why you shouldn’t be worrying, then do something else! That simple device has helped me a lot.
So yes, give yourself & your family a break from this. Tell your wife you’re taking steps to deal with the anxiety. Enjoy your lovely children & your newly renovated house! Night night Daniel. Hope the Nytol helps. Let us know how you go on 😉
Hello Hanne. Thanks again for the reply. I am going to try hard to take the advice, and not be tempted to google. That I think fuels my anxiety. I slept a bit better last night, but frustratingly awoke at around 3:30am and struggled to get back to sleep. Guess what woke me up. The fear of what was in that rubble / hardcore that I spent a whole day breathing in. The other day I found websites saying how some rubble can be contaminated with asbestos from home demolitions. This might sound obsessive, but I decided to call the recycle rubble company asking if they check the rubble, and they said once a month with a test. That keeps running through my mind. I did however think about what you posted, and what I had read on other sites. It normally requires high exposure over years. I calmed a bit, but then my brain thought, 10-20 years before I know. How can I live with that worry. Do you think i am over reacting? I wonder if I am, and understand why my wife is frustrated.
I have taken steps to help get this sorted and called an NHS Anxiety line called time to talk who have booked me in for monday. I hope they can also help.
maybe I will try your idea of writing things down. Also, do you think the support line you gave will help?
You and the others are very kind for giving me the time. Thanks, Daniel.
I do feel for you, asbestos was used a lot at one time ....my old ironing board for instance which flaked everywhere, the inside of my old airing cupboard door, floor tiles, and more recently in the soffits in my roof which were replaced. My first house was built in the 1960s .....when it was new...it was still under 10 year guarantee when we bought it.
To put you at ease a bit the ironing board incident happened 47 years ago, and I am still here.
I must admit, when the dangers came into public knowledge I had many a sleepless night, especially about the ironing board....my father had sawn the asbestos sheet with my help and replaced it before it flaked .
I know you have spoken to your gp, could you contact her again....have any therapies been suggested to help with your anxiety, CBT for instance. Are you anxious about other things ?
Meditation and mindfulness have helped me with anxiety, but yours seem quite specific so talking would help, and meditation with a specialist at first.
Ring the BLF helpline, No Panic have a website too.
don’t let worry overwhelm you.
One point I just remembered, my late father in law used to lag boilers with asbestos in his youth.....lived to be 100.
Take care, keep in touch and contact your GP again , as well as helplines .
Hello Knitter. Thanks for taking the time to reply. You are very kind. You have help put my mind at ease with the story of your exposure and your father in law. Maybe its not quite as "severe" as made out on the web. I know its dangerous, but perhaps due to people wanting to take advantage with court cases, its become more public? okay, this is helping, thank you. I have arranged to speak to a counselor on Monday. Daniel.
Hi again Daniel, I am glad you are getting some professional help, I know when the dangers of asbestos were first made public, it was the blue asbestos that was seen as the problem...then it was extended to the white.
I can tell you I had many a sleepless night...and worried for my children .
I also saw the spoil heaps from asbestos mines in S Africa .
I feel for the people who worked with the stuff for their living though and can’t get compensation .
Hi Daniel. As Hanne62 has pointed out asbestosis is a very rare condition. I am almost 70 years now. In my 20's I was working in the engine room on board a very old oil tanker built in the 30's. It was an 84 hour week for 3 years.
Down in that the engine room was the original huge boiler that stood 20 foot tall, left in there because it was too big to remove. It was lagged with the original brown asbestos, old and crumbling. The engine also had a lot of asbestos lagging on it too. Whilst underway, the whole engine room was shaking and vibrating, the ventilation was very poor. I am sure that there must have been asbestos fibers floating in the air from the lagging on that old boiler.
It takes many years before asbestosis develops. My Oncologist agrees that "I had a not insignificant exposure to asbestos" and I am monitored closely for asbestosis, as part of my regular CT Scans, over Non Small Cell Lung Cancer that is all to do with having been a long time heavy smoker in the past.
Your exposure was really very minimal in comparison to mine and I have not developed Asbsetosis. I really do advise you to stop worrying about the "what if", you only have an extremely small chance of developing Asbestosis, that is of course if you actually did breathe in some of the dust. After all think of it this way, "what if" you waste your life obsessed over it for nothing.
Hello 2 Greys. Thanks for the above. That is reassuring to read. I am glad you are okay after working many years in that environment. Its interesting speaking to real people here, with some having exposure to asbestos and able to tell their story, as it does seem all of google homes in on the "just one fiber" line, which scares me so much. I am not myself in the day, and not sleeping through worry. I need to try and think straight, and talking to you all is helping. I have a call with a counselor on monday, and hope this will help my anxiety, and plan to call the BLF line today. Appreciate the time given here. THanks, Daniel.
You are welcome, it is the reason why we are here, to help.
There is a real problem with Google, it is in respect of the fact that websites can pay Google to increase their ranking, to appear at the top of their search results. In doing so, the real information that you are looking for gets pushed much lower down in the results.
Hi, yes you are so right, when I searched Asbestosis the other day (Being good now and avoiding searching........its so hard......) I do recall the first 3-4 were compensation sites and claims etc. !!
I need to tell my brain, its normally people with high exposure who are affected, and also with your back story of actually being around it, you help ease my fears. I know I have a problem, and I am trying to get fixed,. Shall I call the BLF line? I dont want to waste their time as I dont have any "real" issues with my lungs, and all in my head. I dont want to use time they could give to somebody else who needs it more?
My Husband pulled many things apart which were asbestos. He was a builder. He had a lung condition but not caused by asbestos. We never knew at the time that it was bad for you. He dismantled a whole garage and broke it up for disposal. It is a nasty thing to work with but I think you would need to get a lot more exposure to it for you to be affected. Please don’t worry about something that hasn’t happened and probably won’t.
Call the BLF helpline, if only to quell your overwhelming fears, I am sure they will tell you same. To be honest even a consultant with CT Scans will not be able to tell whether you have been affected or not, it does take many years for asbestosis to start to show up. You may possibly need help with your anxiety though, if it is offered then do take it up.
It sounds like you’ve done a good job and have now got a lovely home. Try not to think of things that could be and concentrate on your lovely family. Unfortunately I lost my husband just over six years ago to Idiopathic Pulmonary Disease which was not caused by asbestos. My Children are all married and have got their own homes. I would give anything to have all my family back to when they were young. I had four boys so it was hard work but well worth it. So enjoy what you have and don’t think about tomorrow.
Hi Mavary, thanks. Sorry to hear about your loss. I have four young children, all under 13, and I think the fear is missing them grow up. Like many said, i am probably worrying over nothing, so need to try and get my anxiety looked at, so I can enjoy them growing up without the constant worry. Appreciate your support.
You can get your home assessed for asbestos, ideally before any work is carried out but to put your mind at rest why not contact the professionals now to discuss and arrange inspection of your home.
Keeping fingers crossed things are not as bad as feared.
Thanks Bkin. I do think about getting an inspection, but I now fear the worse, almost like burying my head in the sand! I am thinking I need to get my anxiety fixed, and maybe I will be able to deal with the results if they come back positive. Appreciate the support.
Hello. Update for you. I spoke to a counsellor today. They were very helpful. What is unbelievable, is the person was an ex builder, so had knowledge of the industry. I am sure they were telling the truth and hope would not say that just to appease me, but they helped put my mind at ease, discussing the things I had done, and the minimal risk of exposure.
I also have some strategies to follow. One of which is to absolutely avoid google! Which I know you all kindly said earlier. I am listening to this. I find google was the biggest cause for my raised anxiety.
You have all been so helpful here. Hopefully I can try to work this asbestos fear out of me by following this course plan.
Hi 23Septemeber. Absolutely agree. I followed everyone’s advice on here and the Dr, of avoiding searching. After doing this, I started to feel better. I noticed each time I would search google, my heart rate rising and my anxiety increasing.
I was getting very anxious just li ke you. I still fifer from very bad anxiety. Today I have given ne for a long walk after neglecting it for a whole week. Felt better. Hope I get to see a consultant soon to get a proper diagnosis. Take care
Hi, glad you are feeling better. I am finding going out each day for a walk, run or cycle helps my anxiety. Also tires me out! Good luck with the consultant. Hope it is soon.
You would be an old man before you would get any reactions from any asbestos. Not that I think what you’ve done would affect you. If you’re worried about dust and so forth when you’re doing things, why don’t you get a mask from B&Q. Then you would have no more worries.
Thanks Mavary. Thanks for the message. I now have purchased one. Definitely going to wear fit any future projects. I was careless and didn’t use before, as I didn’t realise the dangers.
I was thinking about you today Daniel, wondering how you’re getting on? I’ve hardly been on the forum recently, family problems. I hope you’re getting your anxiety sorted out and sleeping better. Do you think the large part of your problem IS simply anxiety, & the realisation that tiles & rubble MIGHT contain asbestos provided the catalyst for a full blown attack? If you’ve been working, and refurbishing a house in your free time, you’re probably quite strained & overtired, esp with a young family. And these are such strange & difficult times, a certain level of anxiety is inevitable.
Thanks 2Greys and Hanne62. You both helped me when I really needed it. Talking it through with my counsellor, I can see now that this was Probably the trigger to something that has always been there. Health anxiety. I’m still not 100 percent and so think about “what if” many time through the day, but I don’t let it affect the time and love my family deserve. Initially I was very down, worried and upset. Again you all helped so thank you. I think I have now accepted the possibility of asbestos is low to zero and I am overthinking it.
I have my next session on Tuesday, and hoping this will fix me for any future health scares. Appreciate you all being there for me. Thanks you. Daniel.
That’s great to hear Daniel. You seem to be doing well. Health anxiety must be horrible, and unfortunately many gps are unsympathetic. You seem to be taking control of it though, which is so important. Feeling you’re a victim of something is scary, & I know with some people it gets serious before they get any therapy, by which time it’s harder to control.
This counsellor sounds like a good fit for you. It’s lucky you’ve found someone who understands & with whom you have a rapport. Maybe you should have an occasional regular appointment, just to keep a lid on the anxiety & be reminded of your coping tactics? Don’t forget the postcards, that worked brilliantly for me.
What about the sleeping, is that any better? I sleep very badly but it’s mainly the effect of drugs I have to take. I don’t worry about it these days, but when I was still working it was a major problem.
Hello Hanne62. Thank you again for listening. Yes. I felt so guilty for not being myself around my family. I had to do something. I still have not cleared the anxiety, but the past 2 nights have slept better, in that when I wake up, I don’t sit thinking about it for hours like have been doing, and I tell my brain to think about a past holiday, or something I have done with the children. This works. Also, you’re too with the cards. I have screenshots of positive comments and sites which give me facts such as repeated exposure to asbestos over many years is a major factor etc etc. To remind myself, that is not me, plus comments from the likes of yourself and the other kind people.
I feel I am on the mend, but slowly. I wish I could just delete the worry of asbestos exposure from my mind. Sorry to hear that you are not sleeping. A couple things I tried that the counsellor advised was, some form of exercise, so I did some running today, and the other days an hour walk.
That seemed to help me, but still not enough for a complete sleep through. I was prescribed some medication from the doctor and took a dose, but felt so drowsy and not too good, I had to stop.
I will come back periodically to update you on how I am getting on.
Keep the sleeping meds though. If in future you have a couple of bad nights, just knowing you have something you could take if you wanted to, which will guarantee you some sleep, is enough. I have a kindle which I use a lot at night. It's backlit so doesn't disturb my husband. I've always read a lot and escaping into a novel for half an hour, eg if I wake at 3 or 4am, is enough to re-set my mind. I keep expecting this tactic to stop working, but so far so good! I'm sure you'll be ok over time but if you do have a setback another of my mantras is "I was feeling better than this, so I know it's possible, so I can feel better again." Screenshot please
Yes, let us know how you get on but meanwhile just enjoy life. 4 kids under 13 - respect!
I’m naughty! If I find I can’t sleep I get up and make a cup of my lemon and ginger tea and eat a chocolate biscuit with it. It doesn’t take me long to go off after. If I really can’t sleep despite my tea and biscuit I read my book. The trouble is I don’t want to put it down if it’s a really good one.
I had pneumonia two years ago and since then have slept quite well. So not many biscuits are getting eaten now at night. Just the odd ones. I usually find if I’m anxious I don’t sleep. Usually if somebody upsets me. When I go to bed I mull things over and get cross at the person. I’ve had to learn to speak up if I know someone’s in the wrong otherwise it eats at me.
Hi. Sorry to hear about the pneumonia. Glad you are okay. Yes. Anxiety always seems to creep in at night. So frustrating. I’m still not 100 percent. But I know I’m getting better. Speaking out helps. Just like the counselling. Talking it out has made a difference.
Hi Hanne62. How are you? Been 3 weeks now and wanted to let you know I have now had 4 counselling sessions and feeling much better than I did a month ago. Sleeping well, and chest pains slowly going so al positive. Just need to shake this last bit of worry, but thankfully it is not affecting during the day or night.
Crikey, such a coincidence, I haven’t been on the forum in a while & the day I pop in here you are too 😊 I’m SO pleased things have improved for you. You now know you can control anxiety, which is a valuable life skill. It’s true what they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Maybe that little residual worry will gradually fade to nothing, & one day you’ll realise you haven’t given it a thought in ages
Hello. Lovely to hear from you. That is spooky with the timing I’m getting there. Keep getting moments of worry but sleeping thank goodness. How are you doing?
Hi. Sorry to hear this. Like the song reference it’s really kind you find the time and effort to help others such as myself. Thank you, and I do hope you find a way to get back to some form of normal and sleep.
Thank you! 😀 Have done a screenshot! Pleased the kindle is working for you. I should have something lined up ready just incase. I have kept the pills ready in the cupboard “just in case”.
As for 4 children. Yes, you would expect me to be absolutely shattered each day, but that annoying Anxiety, still finds its way to wake me up!
Right, going to try and sleep now. Thanks again for all the time given.
Hi Daniel, I am suffering from really bad anxiety since March when I first started feeling a bit sob and I was paranoid thinking about the cause. 4 days ago I was officially diagnosed with mild emphysema. Now I’m struggling just to accept this new situation so this morning I started CBT to treat health anxiety. Indeed, talking for two hours to my counsellor already made a big difference.. All the best with the fight !
Pleased to hear the 2 hour talk helped. I find that helps me too. It has not yet cleared the anxiety, but talking seems to calm me down. Are finding you wake up at night too? Sorry to hear you are down. Keep talking to us here. I found it does help. My biggest tip is too really try not to google unless it’s NHS or factual reliable sites such as BHF. I found random googling made my anxiety worse.
Breathing exercises are great for anxiety. No more Dr Google either. Anxiety level went up. Been referred by GP for CBT. Did not cope well with recent diagnosis. 🙄😳🙄
Hi, shall head to YouTube and research. Sorry to hear about your recent diagnosis. Do come on here and chat to us all. I found it helped to speak to others. Also, well done resisting google. Try to remain strong and not go for a quick search as each time I would do this, I found my heat racing and my anxiety increasing.
If you just look online, then head straight to the government based Sites. NHS, WHO etc.
Keep up with the daily walks. This really helped me a lot. Fresh air and out the house.
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