Not coping

[Outdoors]

I'm feeling really upset again

[stone-UK]

Hi

Have you any family members you can chat to about how you feel.

[Outdoors in reply to stone-UK]

They keep telling me my husband will be OK he's not bad. The nurse said his copd is mild and his oxygen levels are 97% he says he doesn't get out of breath that much and a lot of people on here have said not to worry people live a long life. So I feel positive but then I panic and start getting upset because I love him and I want him to be OK

[stone-UK in reply to Outdoors]

Hi

What you need to do, take a step back and speak to GP about your anxiety, I see you have a lot to cope with but don’t be afraid to ask for help. You husband will be fine the condition is chronic not terminal.

Speaking to some of my ex work colleagues, they reckon I will live longer then they will. And you can be assured he we have long and fruitful life.

[Outdoors in reply to stone-UK]

I've just seen you have it bad I'm sorry

[stone-UK in reply to Outdoors]

Hi

As you say I have it bad, not that it stops me! Still go out every day driving, shopping.

I just do things a bit slower.

You husband is doing all the right things, he’s going no where for a long time.

[Outdoors in reply to stone-UK]

Thank you can I ask how long have you had copd for when was you diagnosed. Its good that you can still do things

[stone-UK in reply to Outdoors]

Hi

I was diagnosed late stage 3, 34% lung function, that was about ten years ago, must have had it longer, like most smokers called it smokers cough.

[Outdoors in reply to stone-UK]

Oh my husband smoked before I met him wasn't a heavy smoker then when I met him I ask him if he would stop that was in 2008. Was diagnosed last year but no cough not persistent.

[Hidden]

Sorry to hear that Outdoors..wise words from Stone,family can help definitely but then again maybe they can be to close to the situation,may I ask is it your health that's getting you down but please only answer if your comfortable to do so.Ger

[Outdoors in reply to Hidden]

No I worry about my husband

[Hidden in reply to Outdoors]

Sorry Outdoors I should have known that from yesterday maybe if you and your husband have same Dr maybe you could talk to him/her just relay your feelings but your decision Outdoors

[Darceydoo in reply to Outdoors]

I’ve got lung disease, Sometimes the person that is closest can be affected emotionally too.

[Outdoors in reply to Darceydoo]

When was you diagnosed how long have you had it for

[sassy59]

Hi outdoors, our stone is brilliant and gets on with his life as he’s explained. Often though, being a carer is hard because you’re watching the person you love trying to do things and maybe struggling.

Your hubby is doing well though and that’s such good news. Try and chat to your GP if you want to abs we’re here for you too.

Pete was diagnosed with sarcoidosis in 1991 and COPD in 2010. He’s doing well and enjoying life, so am I.

Take care xxxx

[Outdoors in reply to sassy59]

How long as he had copd for ?

[sassy59 in reply to Outdoors]

Diagnosed in 2010 so 8 years now. Xxx

[Bella395]

Outdoors - I am a carer too so I have some insight into how you are feeling. My OH is very poorly with asthma/bronchiectasis and other issues.

You have to accept the illness and tackle it the best way you can but constantly wishing he was well isn’t going to help. You need to be positive for him and for you. Concentrate on learning about the disease and about keeping him as well as possible.

With or without lung disease, any one of us could die at any time so do not dwell on the future and what might or might not happen. Live one day at a time and treasure the time you have together. If your anxiety is getting the better of you then ask at your GP surgery if you can see a counsellor.

[HungryHufflepuff]

Watching someone you love get ill is just about the hardest thing to deal with. It’s easy for us to say be strong, make the most of your time together, because when it’s happening to you it feels like your world has fallen apart and wrenched your heart out. But, it is also true that none of us know what time we have on this planet or what fates will befall us, and we have to make the most of our time with the ones we love, be strong for the person who’s ill. It’s easy to say, not easy to do. The fear of losing someone you love is unbearable. Try to not think of that but about what you have. None of us know what will happen tomorrow, life can change in an instant, therefore you can’t dwell on what might be, because life rarely goes how you think. Live in the now and love what you have. Easy for me to say, when you’re the one that has to do it. Cry for your loved one when he’s not looking but be there for him when he is. It’s so hard though. Thinking of you.

[Outdoors in reply to HungryHufflepuff]

Thank you

[Sjf129903]

When you get upset it's just going to upset him and that could do him harm as well you6need to be the one in control for him

[Catnip]

Greetings

My husband deals with me by sticking his head so far into the sand that I can hardly see his bum. Maybe that's not your choice of coping, but it's one way. If it's any consolation, your husband's condition really _isn't_ that bad. My initial diagnosis was way back in 1983. Your man needs to look after himself and you need to be fighting fit to make sure he does all the right things. Go and see your GP; tell him (her) how you feel and find a way to improve your outlook. You know what men are like: they really need us to keep them on the straight and narrow.

PM me if you'd like a chat.

Cheers

Catnip

[Outdoors in reply to Catnip]

Thank you

[Nicholatracy]

Exercise, watch your diet, accept the condition is not going away but can be managed and both of you live your lives