Mr Moriarty Came To Call... - Lung Conditions C...

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Mr Moriarty Came To Call...

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A man came yesterday...an efficient sort of a man according to Himself...I didn't see him actually because I was still in a state of undress and it was almost lunchtime...not that it matters, but I hadn't put my teeth in either.

He works with Brian doing up old houses...and he's the man who is going to do our roof! And take the chimney down.

Now this isn't the main chimney of course...this is another chimney which is in the kitchen...when we first moved in there wasn't one...a chimney in the kitchen that is...for the life of us we cannot remember when or how it was built...

Wouldn't you think we'd recall The Stoner hacking his way through the wall and then making good afterwards...but we can't. I do remember him building the actual chimney pot...which I swear is only hanging on with a wing and prayer, mainly because he buggered off and left it unfinished, surrounded by scaffolding for weeks until Himself threatened to sell the scaffolding to the next van load of Travellers who happened past...he came out the next day and took it down.

It was The Stoner who brought the most hideous range ever made and installed it in the kitchen without so much as a by your leave...when I saw it I was quite aghast...take it away I said...it's feckin' awful.

He was a bit cross...said he was sure it'd work perfectly...so he loaded it up with turf and lit it...the blessed thing spewed out vast amounts of thick smoke...it'll be alright when it's warmed up he said...it wasn't. The following day I told him to take it away...didn't care where or how. He dumped it outside the back door where it stayed until it fell to bits...then Himself took the bits to the town re-cycling place.

Mr Moriarty...for that is the name of the roofing man who came yesterday...Himself couldn't remember his first name...thought it might be John...he says he'll take the chimney pot off and drop the stones into the chimney...that interior wall is going to be dry-lined anyway.

I don't mind in the very slightest living a simple enough life...that was our aim from the start...but I have to confess that I really can't wait for the kitchen to be fixed once and for all...

To remember the chimney being built would just be a bonus...

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8 Replies
stone-UK profile image
stone-UK

Hi

Unless you want years of damp, I would suggest he removes all debris of site, and install a air brick at base of chimney in kitchen.

Or remove chimney from top to bottom.

redted profile image
redted

Really looking forward to hearing about the chimney removal,and the new roof,knowing you there are going to be stories to be told,cant wait,Lol

Jessy11 profile image
Jessy11

Hi Vashti, sounds like you'll be in a mess for a while! A new roof & a new kitchen!

Can't wait to hear the tales to be told about the progress of each! 😂😂

Keep well & keep writing 🌺

Twoose profile image
Twoose

Gosh I can't make up my mind if Moriarty has come down in the world from master criminal to master builder. Stupid me , he's gone up in the world all the way to the roof.

Good luck with all the work

I hope you aren't going to be left in a muddle, but I suspect there will be some great stories to follow on from you very shortly. Sensible advice from stone too.

hufferpuffer profile image
hufferpuffer

Moriarty..Moriarty I adore you! Somehow I have that song Mona Lisa...Mona Lisa..in my head...perhaps I need to go back to bed.😁 Oh I hope he does a grand job Vashti and you will be very pleased!😃 xxxxx huff 💛💚💛

bayleyray-uk profile image
bayleyray-uk

Oh Vashti we are truly blessed on this site you thoughts and stories brighten our days. I can understand the odd song title and the era it was made but a whole chimney and a stone one at that. Did himself come in one day and say did you know somebody's built a chimney on the side of the cottage I wonder why.

Good luck with the renovations and as Moriarty is doing the work, perhaps Mr S. Holmes Esq. and Dr. Watson will appear if they do they may be able to take on the case of The Strange Appearance of the Chimney.

Keep well

Sue

Dragonmum profile image
Dragonmum

The teeth and state of undress situation is very familiar to me - happened with postie this morning - 3 parcels to sign for and none of them for me. Cannot tell you how I'm looking forward to the Chimney Saga (you have my sympathy of course, in advance) I know you'll make a better fist of Moriarty than CD did - he'll be more fleshed out and believable and profane possibly? Make sure he de-rubbles and air-bricks as stone suggested; saves a lot of trouble down the line. Our first builder half filled the cavity wall with muck, even down to a chisel!

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