A real oldie.....: A new sign in the... - Lung Conditions C...

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A real oldie.....

wowsa profile image
6 Replies

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

'Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.

Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful research, "MALE & FEMALE" procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender.'

*******************************

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

*******************************

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

(What is really funny is that most of this part is the truth!!!!)

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of check book.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided!

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Re-dial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

SEND THIS TO A MAN WHO NEEDS A LAUGH, AND TO THE LADIES who can handle it....

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wowsa
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6 Replies

Love that

joyce

I wrote this with difficulty. The cat keeps knudging my hand as I use the keys. Who would have a cat like Betsy. Yes, this is worth passing on. Anyone muttering about sexism, SSH!

Absolutely loved it,can just imagen it,even if sexist,ssh!! xxx

longlungs profile image
longlungs

lol sotrue the bag thing is so me :)

KingoftheCocktails profile image
KingoftheCocktails

The truth will always out!

KOTC

undine profile image
undine

oh yes ha ha very funny not - ok its true - except - I would have probably panicked on going back for card and backed my car into irate male behind - lol x

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