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Light hearted in the garden.......Hee HEE....KOTC...your daily humour show

KingoftheCocktails profile image
7 Replies

.......................Light hearted in the gtarden

A little boy goes up to an old gardener and says''what do you put on your rhubarb?'' ''well usually rotted horse manure''replies the gardener.''we have custard on ours '' says the boy.

Did you hear about the successful bonsai tree grower?

He ended up looking for a house with a smaller garden,

How do you stop moles digging in your garden? Hide their shovels.

A small boy is helping his dad dig up potatoes''what I want to know'' he say''why you buried the darn things in the first place.''

What sort of animal is a slug? A snail with a housing problem.

Gardener to a friend''do you know where I could get some slug pellets/'' he says '' have you tried Boots?'' ''I want to poison them,not kick them to death!''

Two slugs are are slithering along the pavement.They go round a corner and get stuck behind two snails''oh no''says one ''caravans''

Man to neighbour ''can I borrow your lawnmower?'' neighbour ''No she's not home yet''.

What do you call a stolen yam?

A hot potato.

My wifes a water sign,I'm an earth sign.

Together we make mud.

Why did the bull rush?

Because he saw the cow slip

How do you hide an elephant in a cherry tree?

Paint his toe nails red.

Why did the radish blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing

My mothers menu consisted of two choices

Take it or leave it

God made rainy days so gardeners could get the housework done.

Why are husbands like lawn mowers?

They are difficult to get started,emit foul smells and don't work half the time

Richard

KOTC

Your daily humour

BREATHE EASY = FRIENDSHIP

Take yourself to your local Breathe Easy.ENJOY

Join by attending or phone BLF Helpline for information 03000 030 555 Mon-Fri 10am 6pm

Take a look at the British Lung Foundation Website for interesting facts

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KingoftheCocktails profile image
KingoftheCocktails
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7 Replies
chellshock profile image
chellshock

Very good made me laugh :)

scrobbitty profile image
scrobbitty

Hah! I'm the one who hid the moles' shovels - little pixies can use their flippin' hands :)

hufferpuffer profile image
hufferpuffer

Brilliant KOTC! I loved them,I'm off to sleep now with a happy smile on my face thank you! xxx

Lovely one, I could just imagine it!!!! xxx

Great one it saves me thinking up my jokes. well done

Another roaring or do I mean coughing laugh to wake up too. It is only 8am and I am already exhausted from laughing. Thanks Kingy. xxxx

undine profile image
undine

Very good - thank you x

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