Rant alert!

[Erin001]

Sorry to post this I just need to get the thoughts and stuff out my head!

I had an argument with mum this morning because we ran up the stairs to catch a train. Obviously when I got on I was a little out of breath (not wheezy thank god), she asked me to look something up. I said to her to shush. Just because I wanted to just catch my breath. She told me off for being rude and I explained later on that I was just telling you to shush while I caught my breath and she said why didn’t you say so? Well, when you are out of breath you say the least words as possible. I don’t think she got that into her head but we’ve been arguing since. This was this morning but it’s still going on.

I hate arguing with my mum because when I try to explain myself I just seem to make it worse. I feel like some days I should just give up speaking because if I don’t say anything then I can’t get in trouble for speaking!!

Sorry I know it’s not really asthma related but this is the only page I know will understand and one she can’t see.

Thanks a lot for letting me rant x

[MrsCMK]

This is definitely asthma related and I think a lot of us in here would have had moments like that.

Firstly, I hope you got your breath back and are ok?

Secondly, I completely understand and I feel your frustration. I find that sometimes I get momentarily snappy when I can’t catch my breath. I’m a calm person and generally really nice (if I may say so myself, haha) but in the midst of breathlessness I can’t help but snap sometimes. I used to apologise to people for it but now I don’t because what comes out of my mouth is never mean and people need to lighten up in my opinion 😂

[Erin001 in reply to MrsCMK]

Yes I’m okay it was just a short burst of breathlessness but when your asthmatic you can never tell what short burst of exercise will do to you

And even though I’m fairly controlled now it doesn’t mean I won’t get wheezy.

I didn’t but I just like to let my breathing settle so i know it’s fine.

I never mean to be rude or anything just short words are necessary until I can confirm my lungs are fine x

We are okay now just it annoyed me and I knew you lot would understand x

[Minushabens]

I can relate to this - I usually just say 'give me a minute' or 'just a tick'; something like that. Most people that know me understand these days, but people who don't get it tend to just assume I lack fitness until I recover enough to explain.

I'd just prepare your own little phrase that comes across as friendly but gets across that you can't breathe!

[Wheezycat]

Perhaps you could agree some kind of hand signal with your mum for those moments. Nothing complicated, nor a secret language, just tune her in what might be happening when you raise your hand. Though I am nothing like as bad as many on here, I still know those breathless moments when speaking just isn’t an option.

[EmmaF91 Community Ambassador in reply to Wheezycat]

I use this a lot tbh. I pretend to puff inhaler into my mouth and then signal 2/5 mins to whoever I’m with. When asked if I’m ok I then give thumbs up. They generally understand to give me a few mins to sort myself out...

[starveycat]

I just say can't breathe and hold my hand in the stop sign. Usually this works and people understand

[Junglechicken]

It is very hard for someone who has never experienced asthma to truly understand how you are feeling. I know members of my family see asthma as simply, you have an attack then your fine. It's really not as simple as that as we well know. Asthma has a very strong effect on the mind as well as the body. I've been very grumpy/anxious/stressed/afraid to the point I didn't want to get out of bed during this latest flare, which my usual medication wasn't controlling for the first time in my adult life. Sadly, I can make others feel the same way too because of it. My new medication is thankfully now working after 9 weeks and my PF is higher than it has been in years. I am more settled in my mind as a result. Don't be too hard on yourself, your human and feeling normal human emotions in a difficult situation.

[Emer1000]

I know where youee coming from. My kids are young they know when mammys asthma is bad as I put two fingers together up to my lips and press 2 /3 times or put my index finger and thumb in a C shape up at my mouth and move my index finger few times and they know I need my inhaler. I completely get the study thing. Other thing I've done in the past is clap my hands and my husband then helps as until I got my asthma under control last year this was a regular occurrence every chest infection I got I was house bound and could not walk far.