Silver linings

[EmilyGolds]

Hello all you wonderful warriors 🙂

It has been a while since I have written, so just wanted to update you all.

I had ppp in 2014 after having my son & it was one of the most scary & traumatic things I have faced to date.

The last 4 years has been an amazing journey, full of twists & turns, tears & laughter. I am now in a place where I can hand on heart say that I am fully recovered from my ppp & the debilitating depression which followed in my recovery journey.

Life is good and my son is due to start school next September 😯!

I do remain watchful of my mental health & have to keep up my personal self care routine in order to stay well. This is something I have learned over the years & it is crucial for everyone, especially us ppp Mums.

Taking time to nurture myself has not come easy to me however, massages, receiving reiki, meditation, spending time in nature & eating healthy foods are all things I try to do to regulate mood.

I have recently celebrated my sons birthday and this has always been a double edged sword. Happiness for bringing him into this word & sadness & guilt for the traumatic illness which followed.

This year is different! This year I have found my silver lining. The future is bright and I recognise that ppp is just something I experienced, it is not part of me. Before now it has felt like I would never move past it fully & it would always be there, festering inside me like an unwanted visitor.

My family & I are about to embark on a new chapter! We have a preschooler in the house & I intend to embrace every moment & relish the present.

In the past few weeks I have started writing about my psychosis experience. The timing is right as I am far enough along my journey to remain healthy whilst writing, however, still close enough to retain some of the raw emotion needed to convey this experience.

I am employing the services of a counsellor whilst I undertake this process as I am aware of how many emotions this will throw up.

For anyone experiencing ppp at the moment, hang in there after the storm comes a rainbow 🌈 and you too will find your silver lining 🌥

Love & strength

Emily xxx

[Hannah_at_APP Administrator]

Lovely post Emily, thanks for sharing. Xx

[EmilyGolds in reply to Hannah_at_APP]

You are welcome Hannah. It’s important to recognise how far we have all come & to show others recovery is possible 😊

[Ellie_at_APP Partner]

Hi Emily, thanks so much for your lovely post - I know that it will give so many women on here hope when they read it... we know there are a lot of people who read posts on this forum and don't reply so you'll be making a big difference to people you may never know Like you say it's so important that we share our recovery stories, as things feel so hopeless when you are going through it...

Take care Emily, and thanks for all you contribute to this forum too.

Ellie X

[EmilyGolds in reply to Ellie_at_APP]

Hi Ellie,

You are welcome 😊.

I found this forum later on in my recovery so am happy to share my experience. It has been helpful talking to others here who have been through ppp.

The never ending tunnel feeling is still fresh in my mind & I would have benefited from knowing that It is possible to break though to the light in time & with support & professional guidance.

Well done APP for all that you do.

Xx

[Anna_10]

I love this. You have expressed pretty much how i feel too. There is light at the end of the tunnel for all going through this horrible journey. I still have a few moments every now and then. But I stop and think how far I've come since 2013! It's great to try to help others and even greater when you hear happy stories like yours. My daughter started school in September and is now reading, writing and coming on so well! I couldn't be more proud. Thank you so much for sharing. All the best. Anna x

[EmilyGolds]

Hi Anna,

I think those moments do remind us how remarkable our journeys have been. My creativity is returning once again and I felt inspired to share my insights. Thank you so much for your kind comment.

Huge congratulations on your daughter starting school :-). Such a proud moment for you.

Kind regards

Em x

[Hidden]

Hi Emily,

you are very eloquent with your words and I believe that whatever you are going to write it will be so inspirational, useful and helpful for not only mums, but family and friends.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts!!!

When I was still struggling so much my first contact was Elaine Hanzak. Her story and e-mails probably was a turning point that I was not lost as much as I thought. Desperate times often lead to some amazing people, but also beautiful literature.

There was a course on future learn run by Warwick Uni, where lecturers and some very well known people with mental health issues discussed hypothetically whether literature and poems help with mental health challenges...I am a great believer that words can heal as much as they can damage.

It is a great responsibility to write publicly, because there is a conduct with regards to sensitive issues, legal obligations and gate keepers...

However, be brave and connect with others for proof reading and content advise!

You are an amazing lady...Write, write, write - it is such a healing process...

Bye for now and wishing you all the best...health and happiness for you and your family and a merry Christmas.