Needs Assessment Results confirm how I feel. In 2005, my Mom died....someone who lovingly cared for all was abused and neglected in Nursing Homes. She went in for 3 weeks rehabilitation and fell trying to climb into a raised bed on her own while the staff who left her in a chair for hours were talking about their Christmas Holiday and gifts......and it gets worse as she broke her hip, bed sores etc. She fought to live because with Alzheimer's she thought her five children were little and needed her. My brother Donald living in Spain lost his partner of 49 yrs three weeks before. He was moving near me in NYC but died. I buried him in Malaga with his partner. When I returned home, my sister told me her cancer returned and spread. She died the following year and suffered great pain. Five months later I received a call that my kid brother, age 49, was killed in an accident. That's when I felt a black hole in my chest. My guess is SVT started then.
My social life, traveling, kayaking, hiking, dancing with Appalachian Mountain Club were on hold. I retired almost 4 years after my kid brother Kenny died to do the activities I love. Now I rest. My energy is low. I'm sad but stopped the Buproprion recently. My mood improved a bit. Still. I don't know how to be an only child. I have friends but can't do what we did together. I booked 2 weekends with the club on Fire Island as I did last year but didn't go...can't carry a backpack and hike through sand to get there. Plan to rent sheets,take a small pack with leggings, tops. Hope springs eternal. I am sleeping less eating better. Great muscle loss, hair grew back, skin n bones but gained ten of thirty pounds back. I miss my siblings. I'm happy I told you my story. I'm crying. Thank God for this community. Peace, health, happiness to all.