Only Now: "Only Now" * the past is done... - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer

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Only Now

greatjohn profile image

"Only Now" *

the past is done,

the future pre-ordained....

Now is where we must

seek God.

Now is where we must

accept Joy.

Now is realitiy.

gJohn 9/16/21

*written after a day in the hospital and having driven myself home last evening in time to make dinner, snuggle my puppy and my husband....and go to bed early. I had spent the last 24+ hours in an emergency room/hospital room being told I needed surgery, being catheterized, bleeding from my urethra....and then being released when I explained to the doctor what they were seeing in the cat scan....some scar tissue from a past surgery. I peed outside when I arrived home...a boisterous and joyful and steady stream of clear white urine. I did this because I knew Sparky was going to take 20 minutes to give me enough kisses to let me go to the bathroom.

After eating "the best turkey burger ever" as I called it....I went to sleep early at 10 pm.

I awoke at 7 am and went to the bathroom. I feel back into deep sleep. The phone rang at 8:19 am....a friend...apologizing for waking me. I assured him that I was thrilled he could "join me"....chatted for a moment and then took leave and went back into this deep sleep. I finally awoke at 8:30 am....and the words (almost exactly) that you read above came into my head. I had been in a place that was the future. Upon awakening, I was in the present and I was able to feel the beauty of the present. I had seen the future (it was already in the Akashic record, the "Book of Life"...,the "Great Book"). My past I had not brought with me....I was in the now. I was present and it was beautiful.

To my expression "Life is Beautiful"...I know must add "Now"

"Life is Beautiful Now"

gJohn

62 Replies

Love it!!

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to CRK2

Have a great day and a great moment!

CRK2 profile image
CRK2 in reply to greatjohn

I am having a fabulous day!!! I follow you pretty closely…you have a great attitude and express it well. Thank you for all the positive waves!!!

Thanks, John - you are truly great - I think of you daily, and I send what energy across the states to you.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to spinosa

I am humbled and filled with joy by your words. "Life IS beautiful NOW"

Beautiful. You had "awakening" in two senses of the word this morning! We should all be so lucky. (Well, we ARE so lucky... it's just that most the time we can't know it because our minds are stuck IN time, either past or future.)

"I was in the present and I was able to feel the beauty of the present." If there is a better example of what is called "God's Grace" I don't know it.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to noahware

The breeze (now) is Beautiful as I sit in my red chair on the front porch as the gardeners have completed their work in the neighborhood.

I say this with assurance: by the end of the day, your post will have made my entire day.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Bethpage

Now your words have brought tears of joy to my happy eyes.

siouxbee19 profile image
siouxbee19 in reply to Bethpage

My same exact thoughts as this is the first thing I've read today out of my inbox! Bless you, greatjohn & thank you from the bottom of my heart! 🕊️🙏❤️🕯️🐕

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to siouxbee19

Your words are my blessing!

siouxbee19 profile image
siouxbee19 in reply to greatjohn

🤗🕊️🙏❤️🕯️🐕

You always find the angle that lets the light shine. Thank you for being who you are and sharing.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Lousab

My prayer is that a lot of light breaks through into your life today and in the future.

Thank you for reminding me! It's NOW and its BEAUTIFUL

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Anomalous

I am just back from the Optometrist who told me I have a slight start of Cataracts in both of my eyes. They made an appointment for me for one year from now for follow up. I told the girls in the office if I make this appointment girlfriends , we’re having a big party!

Welcome to the light buddy … I’m so happy for you. Few here will be this fortunate . I can’t think of a more deserving nice guy. Congratulations.

🌸🌻🌈🦋❤️❤️❤️❤️

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Kaliber

As Saul became Paul, transformations are a miraculous effect of the Light. Peace be with you.

Kaliber profile image
Kaliber in reply to greatjohn

❤️❤️❤️❤️

I’m obsess daily over “What ifs”. Thanks for this.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Jmr11820

We are here now. Life is beautiful now. Lots of love and blessings your way.

Your words always inspire me. And your food pictures always make me hungry. You are truly "great" greatjohn!

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Yadifan

Your devotion to helping your husband in his time of need is so beautiful, you inspire me to try to be a better person. I’m here brother

Ironically, There are no words to show the depth of appreciation for your words 🙏

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to 5to0

I am speechless by your kindness.

Words can touch just as much as a firm hand or soft lips razor blades

or fingertips

words for some the shield from which they hide

some the key to whats inside

words to some can make them smile

Make the old feel like a child

Some use words to caress

A loved one they 'll never undress

Or to their god

Their lifes to bless

My words may cause

You some uneasiness

Morbid at times

Others full of happiness

But such is my life

So the words confess

Take them with a grain of salt

Or less........i take your words to heart john because i know the journey from wich they are spoken.....b.w.

How beautiful.

Being in the now is what life is all about

🙏

Thank you for your words. It's important to keep our heads lifted up and love in our hearts as we go through these difficult times. Your words serve as a much appreciated reminder. Thank you!

Loads of love and Respect Always positive

"Death" flies out of the window making your "Now" with everything around you "The most beautiful ever" ! You have offered such beautiful flowers to us that we can smell their fragrance and feel the softness to forget all our pains. Your amazing attitudes and outlook take life to a different level beyond imagination. You are breathing for us dear... 💗🙏.

God is our healer and food is our medicine. I suspect much of what we are told by the prostate gurus is nonsense. Quality of life is more important than length of life. We will all pass our sell by date eventually.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Masirah

Closer to the truth !

Masirah profile image
Masirah in reply to Sisira

I've been reading the book, The Great Prostate Hoax, by Richard ABLIN PhD. He is the doctor who discovered prostate specific antigen. Also the book called Over-diagnosed by Dr H Gilbert WELCH. Both are endorsed by numerous specialists in the medical profession. They explain how many of the treatments are to do with making money and not helping the patients. How many amongst us have experienced the side effects of ADT, surgery, radiation treatment and chemotherapy? Many of these are reducing the quality of lives, so I am opting for a different route. Of course, I may be totally wrong, time will tell. The problem is I had an oncologist saying one thing and a urologist saying something else, when it came to treatment. Also the urologist refuted he had told me the size of my prostate was 26cc (The accepted size is 15cc to 30 cc). This was highlighted in a letter, so I had it in black and white. Yet verbally he told me my prostate was 32cc in size. I have got to the point where I no longer trust much of the medical profession. Indeed my niece, a medical doctor, has explained that prostate cancer is not the problem everyone believes it to be. I wish everyone on 'HealthUnlocked' the very best outcome for their individual problems, but implore everyone to research the subject thoroughly and to have an open mind.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Masirah

Thank you Masirah for your honest views. Absence of human compassion and the greed for money are at the bottom of this issue when it comes to medical experts and the advanced treatments ☹. It is more difficult to fight with them than to fight with the Cancer! There is no Cure for Cancer because they want to keep it for ever as a cash cow. God cures and we pay the doctors !

Masirah profile image
Masirah in reply to Sisira

There may or may not be a cure for cancer, but we can fight it in other ways. Diet, physical exercise, good sleep and a positive attitude help. I have just been reading about how estrogen is a major contributory factor in PCa. Yet the Prostate gurus prescribe androgen deprivation therapy medication, which reduces our testosterone. For goodness sake, I am 70 years of age, so I'd have thought my testosterone was declining naturally. With declined testosterone, comes increased estrogen, which makes things even worse. It makes our bones weaker and reduces physical energy, making quality of life far less than it was. They say ginger and curcumin slow down the progression of cancer growth, as does walking, reducing sugar and refined carbohydrates. That's the route I aim to take, not the course which the medical profession would have us believe works. I imagine many have died early sticking to the contemporary medical treatments. Each to their own.

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to Masirah

This thread/discussion is here due to a beautiful post by Great John.

Possibly you could/should create a new post to share your views and open up for comments but not in the middle of this thread. Thanks in advance.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to CAMPSOUPS

Any conversation that is filled with people trying to understand each other and help each other is a good thing.🥰

CAMPSOUPS profile image
CAMPSOUPS in reply to greatjohn

So true. You are very generous, forgiving. Better words are at the tip of my tongue but that's what I quickly have for now.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Masirah

Well and good Masirah 🙂. Do your own research with an unbiased mind without trusting too much on anecdotal evidence. Outstanding claims need equally outstanding evidence. Read as much as possible on this subject including Prostate Cancer Cell Biology and the various Gene Mutations. It is a really difficult task to fight with an aggressive advanced prostate cancer. The cancer cells are much smarter than the researchers, medical specialists and the treatments used against them. I can't understand where the cancer cells have their brilliant brains ! Anyway we cannot stop and rest in this journey once we start. Use all the resources available. Make your own decisions, but the right decisions at the right time without compromising on your purpose. It is your precious life and it is in your own hands. At least it should be!

Most sincerely I wish you absolute success in your journey. Please keep in touch with us at HU.

Masirah profile image
Masirah in reply to Sisira

Have you looked at the Cancer Active Charity, run by Chris Woollams? Also read up on a Frenchman named Guy Tannenbaum who managed to survive State 4 Prostate Cancer.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Masirah

Prostate Cancer for each individual is unique and different. It is something like your finger print not matching exactly with anyone else's. Mainly because it is a Genetic disease and there can be thousands of gene errors ( mutations ) leading to the formation and progression of the cancer. Even in the same individual these mutations vary from time to time advancing to different stages. There are some rare types of mutations which are lethal right from the beginning such as the Neuroendocrine ( small cell type ) which do not express any PSA. When it comes to treatments, conventional or otherwise, with the same treatment one may survive for 25 years or his life may be as short as 2 years. Deviating from a strong research and evidence based approach and believing in isolated and anecdotal cases of success as claimed by those proponents have proved to be misleading in many instances for those who are affected by this insidious disease. If you are trying to manage a Stage 4 Prostate Cancer every step you take is critical and has direct and immediate impact on your precious life and survival. I don't see the pathology of your PCa in your profile given to HU. You can see mine if you tap on my name. I hope you are reading the questions and answers pouring into the HU site on a daily basis. It is a priceless source of information, learning and sharing of experiences and opinions whilst you can maintain the freedom of your choice. BTW I am still in stable remission with undetectable PSA ( 0.008ng/ml ) since my diagnosis and initial treatment in 2015 March for a most aggressive PCa of Gleason 9. Hope you will have a good plan to manage your case most effectively and successfully.May you have peace and happiness throughout your journey !

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Sisira

Sorry, to your exact questions - I have not.

Masirah profile image
Masirah in reply to Sisira

Have you read the books the Great Prostate Hoax by Dr. Richard Albin and Over-diagnosed by Dr. H Gilbert Welch? They give some explanation why I am taking the route I have chosen. I also wish you well on life's journey. Stay safe.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Masirah

Thanks 🙂. Please let us know your progress and success with what you do in managing your condition, when you have time. Best of luck to you!

Great post John. Knowing your name is written in the Book of Life makes the now so much easier. You know the future and it gives you hope. Thanks for your words as always.

No words...🙏🏽

Life is great if you don’t weaken 😄. Keep up the battle there warrior 🙏🙏

My daughter was born 30 years ago, a beautiful baby with bright big brown eyes and a contagious laugh. She was diagnosed with a rare brain damage that would leave her unable to walk or talk physically. I always wondered what she would look like and one morning between waking and sleeping I saw her, it didn't look like her but I knew it was her because I felt her spirit. It stayed in my mind for a moment then I fully awoke. It taught me my life lesson that it doesn't matter how we change physically our spirit remains the same. Im always talking about my book of life I may have even mentioned I felt you were in it, now there is no doubt

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to Vindog29

what a beautiful story....what (two) beautiful souls. Your's and your daughter's.

Sisira profile image
Sisira in reply to Vindog29

My honour to a great father 🙏.

Keep up the fight, now.

Wonderful!

Wonderful post GJohn. Thank you for bringing me joy today.

greatjohn profile image
greatjohn in reply to MateoBeach

Thank you for bringing me joy. Visualizing a bright future for you.

I am hearing it over and over so I know you are a messenger. Thank You!

🙏🏻🥰

He is right, though I would quarrel with the fore-ordained part. Good to read of persistence and resistance.

Great picture as usual. Even the cucumbers look tasty. That is an artist at work. I also sometimes wonder about the great questions of life, like why is a ham burger not called a cow burger or a beef burger. Why does j-o-h-n put hyphens in his name? That's a big one. I know you are struggling with huge issues now. Will the next treatment work? Will I be ok? Will Richard and Sparky be ok? I too try to live a life of only now. A great poem. Of course tomorrow will be today which means tomorrow is also now. (I have studied TA well.) I wish you all the best GREATJOHN. Monte

"clear white urine"? You're a pint low on the yellow.......

Good Luck, Good Health and Good Humor.

j-o-h-n Friday 09/17/2021 6:07 PM DST

I know from where you speak and live. Every now is forever. My husband died after living with advanced prostate cancer for 6 1/2 years. I am blessed to have shared any moment with you on this site. As I often say on a game I play with my dear Alliance friends, Huzzah!

Wonderful…I’m so sorry for your loss.

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