There was a king who was filled with joy because his daughter was to be wed.
So he sent out invitations by hand to all the lords and ladies of the kingdom.
Come to my daughter’s wedding, he said in his proclamation.
Share my joy that she is well married and her future guaranteed.
He called his stewards and ordered them to gather the best wines from across the region, and the juiciest fatlings, and the most agreeable fruits and cakes.
The night of the party, he had his orchestra play his favorite songs, including his very favorite, Tampico.
The hall was decked with every kind of lantern, bauble and wreath.
But no one came.
His daughter and her husband hung around for a while, then slunk away.
The king’s mood morphed from joy to anger.
He directed his sheriffs to visit the estates of the wedding guests and put them to the flame – their houses and barns, the crops in the fields, the cattle standing in the grass.
Also everyone was drawn and quartered.
Still angry, the king took to his chamber, weeping into the satin pillows.
In the middle of the night he awoke to see the Master standing before him.
Master, he said, you have come to celebrate my daughter’s marriage with me!
Not really, said the Master; I do not like the way you treated your subjects.
But I sent them all invitations to join me in my joy, and they ignored the invitations.
My daughter is heartbroken – believe me.
The Master narrowed his eyes, for he did not believe.
Tell me, he said, did you put the right date on the invitations?