Sad news: My father ended up in so much... - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer
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Sad news


My father ended up in so much pain the cancer was pushing on a nerve on his spine and he then lost use of legs and pain in neck/arm, he went to a hospice and they controlled the pain, he finally gave in his fight on 11th Feb, he was in peace and no longer in pain. He had a good quality of life right up until the last few weeks.

64 Replies

I am sorry to hear the news. I read your posts and it seems that you were right there with him. How long was he diagnosed with advanced PCa?

in reply to BarronS

2 years. He tried hormone therapy and some other treatment but didn’t want Chemotherapy as he was 80.

Karmj, Sincere condolences on your loss. Hospice is an invaluable service to the terminally ill and their families, as they skillfully provide compassionate care at the very time we need it most. From your post it sounds like you and your father got exactly that from your hospice staff.

Having been beside at the death of four family members from cancer, I am one who favors a decision for a shorter, but higher quality of life, over one that extends a painful, miserable life - often for no more than several days or weeks at best. As one of the hospice nurse commented during the final days of one of these family members, "While modern medicine may not yet offer cures for many cancers, it does provide powerful drugs that can control the pain terminal patients have at the end of their lives."

May you find peace and solace in the knowledge that your father lives on in the lives of those he knew and loved. I'm sure his memory will be with you every day for the rest of your life. Best Wishes to You and Your Family. Be Well - cujoe

hospice is fine to a point. once they connect to the family they control the meds and the family member totally. also they aren't free medicare gets charged over 5,000 per month we got a bath aide a couple of times and a nurse maybe 1x per wk. if the family isn't medically experienced then hospice is better then nothing. if they have $$$ private duty is cheaper and does the same.


Hi - have had four experiences with hospice care at home - all remarkable.


in reply to Fox2018

With all due respects to CharlesMyers, like Fox, I have also had four (three at home, one in a hospice facility) that were all remarkable. Be Well - cujoe

I’m terribly sorry for your loss. I’m glad your father found relief in hospice. As you look back over his life, I hope the happy moments sustain you.

So sorry for your loss. Hospice is amazing and can’t thank those who choose that line of work enough. May you find comfort in your memories of him soon. 🙏


in reply to Tub111

So sorry for your great loss. Glad there is no more pain for him. God bless!

We all feel the loss when one of our own is lost.

My sincerest condolences for the lost of your Father :-(. We all mourn the loss of another brother in this fight, Rest in Peace Sir and suffer no more

Love/hugs - Randy

so very sorry to hear of your loss. Gods speed...….

So sorry. Will pray for you and your family.

May he Rest In Peace!


So sorry for your loss.

Sorry to hear of your loss.

My condolences on the loss of your Dad. I think he was courageous to choose life on life’s terms for his last months. Surrender is not giving up but acceptance. Your love and support for your Dad shone through your posts. May he rest in eternal peace.

Peace to your father..


Bless you and your father. He has peace.

Sincere condolences, and very best wishes to you and your loved ones.

There really are no words to describe a loss of anyone close to you. It is hard to see them suffer. I think that it is more difficult than the suffering itself. The relief that comes from letting go of what has been so hard for so long is good, even when you may feel guilty and be incredibly sad at his loss.

There is so much that you and your dad have shared over the course of your lives that will always be there, even if faded and perhaps becoming a whisper over time. The memories and warm hugs, funny situations and sad ones too, that will pop into your head and make you laugh or cry. It means you are alive and well!

May your joy be greater than your grief and may you smile a little bit more each and every day from this day forward.

The best to you and your family and friends.

in reply to dmt1121

Karmj, everything dmt1121 just said. No one can say it any better. I too wish you the best going forward. Monte

Dear Karmj

I’m so sorry for your loss

I’m very glad your dad had quality time before the last few weeks

I wish you and your family all the best

So sorry for your loss Karmj .

My sincere condolences to you and your family. Good to hear your dad had a good quality of life until the end.

Sorry for your loss, and best wishes to you. Know that your father was very greatful you were able to be there.

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending my condolences to you and your family! May he RIP.

So very sorry for your loss, may he Rest In Peace and your heart be comforted by the Holy Spirit

So sorry for your loss. Thank God hospice took away his pain. I'm sure his quality of life up till the last few days was amazing because of his wonderful family.

Be comforted in knowing that every life is precious to all of us fighting this battle and that we share in the sorrow of your loss.

So very sorry for your loss. Thankfully he was made comfortable at hospice care.

So sorry for your loss. I’m glad Dad did not have to suffer long. Amen for pain meds and the love of a family. 🙏

Sorry for your loss. Glad he passed away in peace.

Condolences on your father's death. As others have said choosing quality of life can make all the difference. Peace to you, as well.

My God Rest His soul, And Yours

So sorry for your loss.


So very sorry for your loss. May your dad rest in peace!

Prayers of comfort for you and your family. He was a warrior who faught the beast well. 💕

Praying for you and your family

i am so sorry.🙏

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. If there is any consolation it might be that he had a good quality of life right up until his passing, and now his suffering is behind him.

I respect his choice and am glad he not longer has to live in pain. I hope that your grief lasts only as long as it is needed.

I get so sad after we loose another warrior, against this disease. Anything I say cannot be but a drop of water in a big ocean. I can just pray for you, and the rest of your family for your loss, and that your father, has moved on to a place where there is no pain--only Shalom.


I’m very sorry to hear this:( God bless you.

You have my very deepest condolences. Peace and blessings.

So sorry to hear 🙏🙏🙏🙏

I am sorry for your loss. Glad that his QoL was good till the last few weeks. God willing my ending will be quick too. Am praying to the God the Father that you and your family were able to share his joy during the time he was fighting this illness. Stay strong and seek peace and comfort from the Lord. He promised that someday you will see your father again.

So sorry for you and your family. Wonderful that you were there to with him. My his memory comfort you.


So sorry for your loss.

May he rest in peace.

My condolences on your loss. God bless you and family. He rests in peace now.

Sorry for your loss.

"He had a good quality of life right up until the last few weeks."

Good to hear this, take some comfort in that.

My deepest condolences to you and your family.

wishing you peace and serenity.

my sincere condolences as well Karmj.

I am so sorry to hear of your lose and thank you for sharing. My peace be with you and your family. Peace and love/hugs.

I am so sorry. May he rest in peace.

Very sorry to hear this news. My heart goes out to you and all of his friends and loved ones who helped him along the way and gave him love.

To the Karmj family, I'm guessing that the name is an East Indian name and probably Sikh. If it is I will try my best to say "Sat Shri Akal" in my Gringo best. I know that in the Hindu religion the eldest son must place a fire on their deceased parents head at the funeral pyre. That is a tough thing to do, but it must be done. May your Dad be blessed and in peace with his God. May your family cherish is memory and remember him for the rest of your lives. The Greeks have a saying for surviving family members, Η ζωή στους ζωντανούς (life to the living). Peace.

J-o-h-n Thursday 03/21/2019 2:05 PM DST

My sincerest condolences.

I'm so sorry for you loss, Karmj, and that your dad had to be in any pain. He is a model for all of us to live a good quality of life until the end. Blessing for you in the grief journey.

I do not know how many of us are on this site. The numbers change with time. This is the second time in 4 weeks I will level off at flight level 410 and look at the sky and say a prayer for you and your family ....

in reply to pilot52

410...Dreamliner? That's the only commercial plane I know of that cruises that high.

Sorry for your loss. May your father Rest In Peace

I'm very sorry to read of the loss of your dear father.


Blessings of peace to you and yours

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