Trying to do normal!

[INTPADHD]

Hi, first post! Weird to be honest. I've struggled so much with doing everyday things, I just give up on them and dont get it done until it's what feels like last possible second. My life is falling apart I'm in my head so much I get nothing done

[johnfamilyman]

Sounds just like me, You’re in the right place with people like you to lend a helping hand encouragement, we learn about things we can do to change our behavior or actions and our attitudes from each other be patient and trust the healing process you’re about to begin. It’s an inside job Hope you’re willing to do the work it’s a lifelong effort

[johnfamilyman]

Sounds just like me, You’re in the right place with people like you to lend a helping hand encouragement, we learn about things we can do to change our behavior or actions and our attitudes from each other be patient and trust the healing process you’re about to begin. It’s an inside job Hope you’re willing to do the work it’s a lifelong effort

[RenewedAt42]

You have found your people! I am currently a 45 yr old full time student trying to change careers. I have 2 part time jobs and everything except my grades are a big ole mess. I hyper-focus on school because a) it is actually very interesting to me and b) it's my one shot at having a career that I love rather than one I tolerate. Which, to a big ole ADD brain like mine is the only way to have a successful future.

I can suggest that you somehow trick yourself into doing the necessary things so that you set yourself up to make it imperative that you do them. If you like to entertain, but your house is in shambles, plan a dinner party, or just ask a friend over so you have to pick up enough to make it presentable. Or start small by making yourself clean out the car by offering to drive someone somewhere. I can't tell you how many times I have shut down my life because I was too overwhelmed (by in my own head, not actually busy with too many other things to do). Do what you can, when you can, but also don't beat yourself up about it. I guess it comes down to making the decision to either spend your time dreading the action of doing the day to day tasks, or starting with one thing and feeling a little better when the clutter in your world starts to clear away.

I do not say this from any place of criticism to you... it is something I constantly struggle with. I do not find the motivation until I get disgusted enough to make the first move and pick up that pile of clothes (or boxes, or dirt) off the floor that I have been looking at and stepping over for weeks (maybe longer) and realize it only took 5 minutes to put it away or clean it up. Then the hyper focus kicks in, I furiously clean until everything looks great. I vow to never let it get so dirty again. And by the following week I am back to the same clutter. The only thing we can do is keep trying and keep inventing tricks to make ourselves take care of the small details that are painfully tedious.

[SleeplessinMaryland]

I too need the rush of last minute action to get anything done. Non-ADHD people do not understand and some of them even doubt such a condition exists. If they could only spend fifteen minutes in our heads seeing the world through our eyes. I agree with RenewedAt42 about the time and energy spent dreading the task. Once I get started I cannot stop and get a lot done. I then realize how much time I wasted thinking about, and avoiding thinking about, what I had to do. The thing is, once I have taken action and accomplished something, I am back where I started from the next day. Taking forever to get started on something until I get so fed up I start it. Sometimes it takes months between not being able to get started and actually feeling the frustration enough to get something done. Exhausting.

[gettingby]

Can definately relate. I find I bury so much of what I need to do and get stuck behind the 8 ball constantly. Always seem to make my life more difficult, exhausting and feel like I'm running out of steam. I avoid anything mentally challenging for fear of fucking up and being exposed..been my struggle my whole life. So afraid my kids will eventually inherit and I feel so bad for them..all 4 of them suffer with confidence issues. So hard to fix when I cant even fix myself. Thank heavens I married a strong confident woman. Feel like Im not pulling my weight and tend to soothe by self medicating..nasty cycle