Doctors just aren't listening and know so little about adult ADHD

[Ruby444]

My own journey with finding a doctor to even discuss ADHD with me was miserable. I've had several diagnosis and several doctors all miss the very blatant signs of ADHD. It took 6 years before I stumbled onto my depression being secondary to my ADHD. It took a whole other year to convince any doctor and to get on a treatment plan for it.

I thought all that would be worth it if I could shortcut the pain of this for someone else. Well it doesn't seem my experience is enough.

I was lucky that my neuropsych exam came back conclusive that I had ADHD and didn't have a mood disorder (which frankly I bet I do actually have comorbid depression and ADHD) .

For my partner his came back with no indication of ADHD and only anxiety. I'm not a doctor and I'm not trying to say I have more experience than a doctor... But I can tell you I love with this human and see his struggles daily. I can see how his anxiety is even more secondary than my depression was. We can't even get a doctor to TALK ADHD with us. They just keep throwing the results of the eval at us (despite evals often not being enough to conclusively flush out an ADHD diagnosis. Russell Barkley has made mention of this several times).

We're not even saying he has it (even though I'd bet my life on it) or that he needs stimulants, we just want to find a doctor that will actually listen and not think we're stimulant seeking druggies. I'm at my wit's end. I've been to every doctor in the city that claims to be an adult ADHD specialist, even the ones that don't take insurance... And they're just not good enough. They don't actually listen or even consider ADHD outside the realm of a hyperactive little boy. Honestly, I've had much more luck with nurse practitioners.

Anyone have an advice on how to find a way to actually get treatment? Ive been to so many of the psychs around town or know someone who has and it just seems like we can't find anyone who really gets ADHD or will consider diagnosing an adult without a neuropsych eval.

[Lovinit]

They’re not all that way

[Ruby444 in reply to Lovinit]

Of course they aren't, but we've been to several and I'm asking how to find the right ones without just spending even more time and more money.

[Lovinit in reply to Ruby444]

For me I found the right doctor my second try, he has his own private practice. Maybe what you can do to save some time is before you make an appointment with the doctor you ask a few questions so you can determine if you want to make an appointment or try someone else

[QuirkyCookie]

Have you sought a knowledgeable therapist to get involved? After several sessions, they would have more than a small snapshot of your daily struggles and be able to relay information and recommendations to a doctor. My son's therapist has been in communication with his pediatrician and psychiatrist from day one. Perhaps your symptoms would carry more weight with a mental health professional's opinion to back them up. I realize this is more time and money. It's unfortunate what some of us have to go through to get the help we need:/ I have inattentive ADHD, as does my 13yo son. We're lucky to have health professionals involved who understand that not all males have the hyperactivity aspect.

[Ruby444 in reply to QuirkyCookie]

Thanks for the advice! Yeah, we think his therapist now is coming to the conclusion that it's definitely ADHD. He's using phrases specifically from the dsm criteria so that's definitely a hopeful point! We're just worried even the therapist won't have enough weight over a neuropsych eval that suggests he only has anxiety. Around here doctors seem to get a whiff of mood disorder and think "nope no way it can be ADHD". And then you're just labeled as a stimulant drug seeker when you bring it up but nothing could be further from the truth. I am happy to hear you have a professional that is informed and willing to listen! I am always happy to hear good experiences. It gives me hope.

[Ndfarg]

Did this comment get posted in a wrong thread? This doesn't seem like a sensible response to the original comment, surely?

[Hidden in reply to Ndfarg]

I don’t see why any doctor would make a big deal about giving an ADD med. it’s not like your asking for Percocet. See for me after just being with me for 20 minutes or less it is obvious I have ADHD. And like you I suffered from severe depression and anxiety. Two questions is your ADHD much more obvious than your partners?? What r his signs? But still like I said why can’t they just try him in the med. it can’t hurt??

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

What is a Neuropsych exam?

[Ruby444 in reply to Hidden]

My mother has ADHD and that diagnosis helped carry some weight for my own diagnosis. And I still had to fight for my diagnosis! No my partners ADHD is every bit as clear as mine. It is just that his family was diagnosed with anxiety when they have clear adhd symptoms. I think it's likely a comorbidity - for his mom at the very least.

A nueropych exam is a battery of psychological tests. They measure different parts of the brain that make up IQ. Unfortunately some doctors still believe having a higher IQ means you can't have ADHD. There are other tests to guage impulsivity and such but in general it should be supportive information rather than the sole diagnostic criteria when it comes to ADHD.

It's okay to have different experiences than others. Just because it's easy for some people to get medication (which still completely blows my mind) doesn't mean that's the case for everyone. I don't know why I would post looking for help if I wasn't having trouble? (This is more in response to the get over myself comment) Doctors won't even discuss the possibility of adhd, let alone even getting to the medication discussion. They just shut him down. I've watched it happen to several of my friends. I've had it happen to me and my mother has a diagnosis for crying out loud. I'm not sure what it is with doctors around here but they are very very cautious of prescribing and even diagnosing ADHD. My suspicion is that it's because it's Kentucky and we have the highest diagnosis percentage of children and with the crack down on prescription stimulants many doctors here have become overly cautious. I don't know that is what it is but that's the only thing that makes sense to me with how many doctors just aren't willing to talk about it.

[Frustrated2019 in reply to Ruby444]

Interesting. I am in Kentucky too and you would think I was I asking the doctor for her kidney. It has been a very long process and I am still battling with them. It’s frustrating. I hope you guys find someone that will advocate for you soon!

[Ruby444 in reply to Frustrated2019]

He just got the official diagnosis of adhd I predominantly inattentive yesterday!! It's amazing how when he stopped focusing on mood issues when talking to doctors, how quickly they decided it was actually adhd. We're looking into next steps now. It's frustrating as all get out, but thankfully it's able to be done.

[jdelmonaco19]

I feel your pain and have gone a similar path. I agree...there are not enough practitioners who understand and/or know anything about treating a person with ADHD.

My search still continues to try to find one and to be able to live a better life.

Best

Jim