My 10 year old has behavioral issues .

[Minijoy555]

my 10 year old has behavioral issues . Is temperamental. I do role play with her all the time . She likes to annoy other children . Immature for her age . If I praise her she melts and if I try to correct her she becomes very defensive . She is very sensitive . Her main problem is unable to keep friends and gets upset fast she is always trying to tease other children when she doesn’t get attention . I am debating whether to start her on medication. She is a very good student and gets good grades . She is a fast learner .

the issues I am having with her

1. She enjoys annoying other people .

2. Has issues in a group if she doesn’t get attention .

3 . she acts very immature and looses temper fast .

please advise

[Willowbee37]

Has she tried therapy? Does she have an ADHD diagnosis? Sounds like it could be anxiety related as well. She might be just trying to fit in and doesn’t have the social skills to figure it out on her own. I would talk to the school counselor and see if they could help with that as well. Getting a referral from your pediatrician and finding a counselor would be my first thought. How about sports? Is she on any team sports? Maybe something like softball where it’s a team sport but you are alone a lot of the time so it’s not constant interaction. It’s a great way to build social skills and let out some extra energy.

[Lillianmcmcl]

Having social situations with structure like sports, an art class or a club like girl scouts could help. Or maybe martial arts. They have a code of conduct that could spell out social expectations and maybe create a safer situation that may help prevent her lashing out at others (via teasing). It might help to get her a an older teen mentor if her school or another group like Big Brothers Big Sisters, since it helps so much to have someone other than a parent to talk to.

[Aspen797]

You might want to have her evaluated by a speech pathologist for pragmatic language/social skills. She might benefit from a social thinking/social skills group run by a speech therapist. Sometimes our kids struggle with theory of mind/perspective-taking and simply can’t intuitively know how to speak or act to get the result they want. As much as we want to help our kids, sometimes having another person work with them on developing these tough skills is better, as it helps preserve your relationship. Also social skill groups tend to be more game oriented and less “preachy”

[Onthemove1971]

I am curious, what are your fears of trying medication to help her?People who have tried medication and have been successful often say they wished they would have started earlier.

What helped us the most was watching our son not struggle with self control when taking medication.

It's not perfect, but when it's the right type, dose and timing it really makes a difference.

Good luck..