What happens when you have done all the "try this"

[mfala]

My 16yr old daughter with adhd is constantly defiant, lies and manipulates. She was diagnosed with ODD many years ago however, she does not do anything in anger. She is not aggressive , does not yell, doesn't really argue unless trying to justify her point. I reinforce pos. behavior and it still goes on.. help.

[Onthemove1971]

Thanks for your post. We have a 15 year old so we know what you are going through.

For us the only thing that worked is 2 types of medication ( non-stimulant and Stimulant), consistence therapy ( I am in the session telling them the issues) and a 504 plan at school. We also give him sports which balances the school and tons.. and tons of exercise. I also feel we are not supporting his need for 'hobbies".

All of the issues you talked about are really important to change because they will impact future relationships/work.

I wonder if your daughter needs to gain more maturity. This has really helped our son, who sees how inappropriate his behavior was in the past.

Hope this helps.

Good luck.

[Sabrousal]

I have 16 year old son. Things do get better with therapy. But also as they age, hard conversations need to take place. Like how their actions are viewed by others, how these actions hold them back from opportunities, etc. It hurts, it's uncomfortable but the reality of it is they will so be adults. I would definitely look into exercise. My son always feels better after physical activities.

[spookyscaryskeletons]

I am in a similar boat with my 14-year-old son. He has never been diagnosed with ODD, and these behaviors have just recently gotten worse with puberty, but his lack of caring about the things he says and does and the consequences is mind-boggling. I hope and pray there is a light at the end of the tunnel. We are all in this together. <3

[anirush]

So, my 17 year old grandson's therapist says lying and manipulation are common traits of teens not just ADHD teens. Not that there should not be consequences. You are lucky there is no acting out. My 15 year old grandson still periodically breaks things when he gets really angry.

Sometimes we feel they have no empathy, but teens are so self-centered. Their mom never grew up until mid 20's.

A good counselor can help you both see what is important to get serious about and what can just be let go.