I’m new to this forum but would love some feedback/suggestions on studying tips and completing homework assignments. Do you think a tutor is helpful? And, if so do you think they should be specialized to work with students diagnosed with ADHD? My son lacks motivation to do anything school related. Over the years his joy for school has faded and he dreads doing his work. He was diagnosed with adhd a couple of years ago but I find I am still struggling to find a routine that works best for him. He is 12 years old, in the seventh grade, and he does take ADHD medication. Some days he does great with little to no reminders but other days I feel like we are starting from scratch. I have to constantly repeat myself to keep him focused and on task. Right now he is doing school virtually online but even when in person at school he tries to fly under the radar and will not ask for help. He lacks confidence to speak up for himself and ask for guidance. He will literally sit their and struggle with assignments and not say anything which ultimately makes classwork/homework time longer and more miserable for him. I am thinking he needs a tutor to help reinforce the lessons from class and improve his organization and time management skills. Right now I feel like he is not consistent and I feel like at this point no matter what I try he doesn’t follow through. Sometimes I wonder will he always need reminders or checklists to be successful. I’m trying to help him become independent so that he can do these things on his own but I’m not sure where to begin....
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
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I have the same executive functioning issues (son 13), plus dreadful handwriting-(dysgraphia). I feel your pain and am seeking similar answers. I have read that occupational therapists can help with dysgraphia, but also need the homework support and instruction in methods for homework etc. I cannot afford 2 extra professionals alongside an expensive private school!Are there instructional videos for ADHD ( Inattentive) teens on this sort of thing?
Thank you for the reply, I felt the same way regarding paying for private school and still having to pay for added professionals. Throughout this week I reached out to some tutors and I have settled on one to meet with him twice a week. I am hoping she can help him with the struggle subjects as well as organization when completing his assignments. As for videos, I looked up several videos on YouTube from professionals regarding ADHD and it seems the common theme is consistency and routine. If you have time maybe check out some online and see if you find any suggestions that may be similar. It’s been helpful for me hearing other parents suggestions as well as some expert opinion in dealing with children diagnosed with ADHD.
I feel like I was reading something I could have written as I read your post! I’ll try to answer some of your questions. I have a college son and high school daughter who both have adhd.
love some feedback/suggestions on studying tips and completing homework assignments. Do you think a tutor is helpful? And, if so do you think they should be specialized to work with students diagnosed with ADHD?
Yes yes yes a tutor is necessary. At first before covid my daughter just had a math tutor because she did manage to turn things in when they were in person but she would never ask for help in math. It was a math teacher from a different high school. They met once a week and she was in the special education department.
Now in distance learning all the rest of the wheels fell off the train too even though she’s advanced now in both math and English! Ugh. So now she has reduced assignments through the school and if she doesn’t have them all done by Friday afternoon she meets with a private SAT tutor who is experienced with adhd. They finish and turn everything in together. All virtual.
He lacks confidence to speak up for himself and ask for guidance. He will literally sit their and struggle with assignments and not say anything which ultimately makes classwork/homework time longer and more miserable for him. I am thinking he needs a tutor to help reinforce the lessons from class and improve his organization and time management skills.
You are right! Yes, he is struggling and needs a tutor. My daughter never will ask for help (she also struggles with social anxiety disorder).
Sometimes I wonder will he always need reminders or checklists to be successful. I’m trying to help him become independent so that he can do these things on his own
Yes. My question is does he use them now? My college freshman son is only now seeing the value of reminders and checklists. I have to tell you that until they buy in to this, they won’t follow any system you set up — at least that’s how it was for me. If he does show interest let him use whatever system he wants (calendar book / dry erase board / electronic). The one he is attracted to is the right one for him. My son ended up liking old fashioned note cards and a cork board.
Unfortunately adhd doesn’t go away. He will always need a way to keep himself organized but with maturity he will discover this for himself.
I agree it is amazing! I persevered in not giving up the search for help for my daughter. You ASK and ASK and ASK. Someone may know someone who knows someone! Ask teachers in your schools special education department (if your school has one). Do online searches that include “ADHD” and “TUTOR” or “SAT TUTOR.”
In my case I wasn’t asking around because I didn’t know such help was available. I found our tutor in an unlikely place — through volunteering for our local animal rescue. Before meeting her it hadn’t occurred to me that someone like her even existed! More importantly, I believe in the power of prayer and had been praying to the Lord for help and direction and He delivered in a way I wouldn’t have come up with on my own.
Yes, agreed nothing like the power of prayer. It is prayer that has allowed me to get through so many tearful battles with me son. It’s been so hard just trying to find what works and supporting him with what he needs to be successful. Also, I was doing the research to find a tutor because I thought he really needs the additional support from a professional. Even more, why I asked my question to all of you. Thank you all for the kind words and feedback. And, as you mentioned I also found my tutor from a family member whose son also has ADHD and can relate to my struggle. Her son has seen progress and she felt really confident about the tutor so I am hoping the same for mine.
I searched online for adhd tutors and it seems some companies offer it. I think some may have professionals that are trained in special education and have some knowledge in dealing with students who need accommodations. However, I actually didn’t get much info from them as I decided on a tutor recommended by a family member instead.
Thank you so much for your feedback! I needed that encouragement. I have secured a tutor for him and we start next week. I will continue to support as much as I can and reinforce the systems we have in place. I used to have a written schedule on a dry erase board but he didn’t check it as much. Now that we are distance learning, I’ve created an entire calendar reminder system in his phone for classes, band lessons and practices. It seems to work well and I don’t have to give him a million reminders to log into class. There are days here and there when he may forget once the chime goes off on his phone to actually log on but for the most part it’s working. Now I just need to get him organized with assignment completion. But I can definitely tell this is working better than the schedule on the board.
As for always needing help, reminders, and checklists... I am slowly coming to terms with this. I am starting to understand that my approach for him will need to be different and that’s it’s ok. Or, that a challenge in certain areas in his life may continue to exist. I think for a long time I felt so bad because things were so hard for him or that he had issues socially with others. I felt helpless like I couldn’t safeguard him from bullies, help him make friends or succeed at school and sports. Now I remind myself that he can have those things and succeed but it may take him a little longer, with hard work and added support. Prayerfully things will turn around and he will positively progress with maturity. But hearing from parents who’ve been there makes me hopeful especially when they have sons in college.
I am so encouraged by your spirit of hope! There will always be those down days but the good Lord sees you and is always working in the background. We just have to step back, breathe (hard for moms especially!) and watch for His work or we’ll miss it. Hugs.
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