Teenage son with ADD

[K0205]

Hi. My son’s Dad was diagnosed ADD as a child & his symptoms were probably a direct result of not being able to function in a loving & honest marriage. I’ve always known my son has it too since he was a baby. Yes, a baby. He screamed & cried all the time & became happier when he could talk. Did not sleep through the night until he was 4. When he could walk I took him in to his doctor because I thought he was deaf. Would not listen to me when his back was to me. He would go from one activity to another with in 10 mins, getting bored with an activity. The impulsiveness & not listening or paying attention have been his issues. Not so much hyper activity. It is frustrating raising children that are defiant, angry, & disorganized. He breaks & looses things repeatedly. Very careless. I’ve been raising my son basically on my own since he was little, even when I was married. Amongst these negative & disrupting things he has so many good God-given strengths. He’s highly intelligent & retains information that is important to him, has a love for others including autistic kids at his school. Kids with special needs love how full of expression he is. He’s always conversing with the adults at the school & other parents love him. People don’t realize what I go through on a daily basis just to help get him through the day. I worry about what kind of employee he will be or if he will be able to go to finish college if he chooses to go. He is interested in the airforce but upon reading about ADD & the military they are not likely to accept him. 4th grade was the worst year as that is when teachers pushed for me to get a diagnosis. We went through the steps but the psychologist felt he didn’t need meds at the time because he was coping & keeping his grades up. We had random behavioral issues all through middle school & then by high school his grades slipped & his teachers were noticing him not being focused & so was he. We got a diagnosis for meds & a 504 plan. He has been on Vyvanse which we are trying to find the right dosage now. Driving has been ok but he is not consistent with his responsibilities. Sometimes he stays on task & then other times he does what he wants to do. Having given him some freedom in choices on how consequences should be handled & giving him more independence has challenged him where majority of the time he figures things out. “His” way may not be the path I would choose & sometimes is more chaos & disruption but he feels the confidence in the independence. I am still trying to find local support for parents of ADD/ADHD teens but have not found that. I came across this forum & hopefully I can be of support to others & receive the same. I believe these children are gifted and it’s helping them discover what their own gift is.

[Dadvatar]

My 16yo daughter has found her gift. Spending my money on clothes shopping!

She had just been diagnosed 2 weeks ago so just started meds last week.

I dread the driving as she loves speed , is very impatient and has no fear.

It’s good to here from other parents as my wife is struggling to come to terms with the diagnosis.