Since my son has not returned to college, he has been working as a server and is in the process of taking one class at our local college. It is off-season so his serving job is not providing enough hours to maintain his earnings to pay back his college loans.
We have been adamant that he needs to get a second job, and he has been draggin his feet. My husband makes my son go to work with him to do various jobs such as sweeping, pressure washing, etc. without pay (though we feed him and he has a roof over his head) to try to motivate him to go get another job...all this to say..
He shared with me he is upset living here. He feels we are "ganging up on him" about getting a job but he hasn't found anything that interests him and is "waiting til something clicks". He said it makes him not want to be here and he wants to move out. Then he gets together with friends and uses marijuana to "relax". There has been no yelling, or stern talking, just suggestions, newspaper ads, and questions a couple times a week. We do see him searching indeed.com
I tried to explain to him that a second job is not about a life's decision or career, that he needs to do anything that brings in money. I made him promise that this week he would actually walk in to a building and talk to people about getting a job. I don't understand why he can't understand that he needs a second job! I do understand that he is lost about a career direction but I do not get how he can keep going on day in and day out without making any progress.
On a good note, he is passing College Algebra this semester. He got a 91% on his first exam.
Just sharing because when he hurts and I hurt. If anyone has any ideas on how I can better deal with this situation, please share.
I think I would find out if he needs help applying and help him get the job. I know this might sound painful. But he is showing you that he is more than willing to work and is doing well in his class. Maybe he could work at the college he attends. I think it might be the steps to really getting the job that is hard for him. He could find a better job so he would not have to have 2 jobs. Maybe ask about his "dream job" then help him get it.
I started sending him messages today with possible jobs. He actually did fill out an application today and stopped at one place to inquire if they were hiring. I have considered putting him in my car and driving him to places...
"Dream job" - that's the problem. He doesn't have a dream job in mind.
So maybe the COIN assessment? It is a paper question and answer about careers. He college has a career office, bring him in there and ask if they can give him a career assessment. It's simple and fun to think about, when I was younger it told me I should be a butcher.. they you guys could look in an area he is interested in.
I hope this ends up good for him.
Best of luck,